Redefining My Happy & Taking the Stage

In searching for my next “big thing” in life, I have been redefining my happy. One of the hardest things to do, but the most necessary.

In life, we experience a myriad of things that truly help define who we are. We learn the things that make us happy, sad, angry, and indifferent. Life gives us things that we may or may not be able to change, but we can control how we react to it all. I sit back and remember my 2010 and realize that God allowed me to become greater than ever before. Never would I have imagined facing some of the trials that I have, but certainly, I have become a better version of myself.
I have slowly learned how to process each crisis I am faced with and try to walk away with a lesson. Don’t get me wrong, it is NEVER easy to press through a tough situation. I probably cry just about every day, but I dry my tears and get to the next moment. I don’t ever sugarcoat how I feel. While I don’t take my frustrations out on others, I am very transparent about the emotions I am experiencing. I think when you’re honest with true friends, they can help you walk through it. Many people may not understand your journey, but it is ok. God knows you better than anyone. I always take at least 30 minutes to an hour to spend alone with God. Whether it’s through worshipping or reading the word, I always make an effort to be ministered to. Intimate moments with Him fill you in ways you can never imagine. Many times, all you need is a quiet moment to recharge.

Today I had the opportunity to speak to about 300 kids about bullying, following their dreams, and helping them to define their passions in life. As I stood on stage, I literally had an out of body experience. I have spoken to youth for many years, so this was no new thing for me. Something about this day was very unique. I simply was not by myself up there. I felt the presence of God and my earthly father all at once. It hit me! This is where I am supposed to be. This is where it all came together. This is what God wants me to keep doing. Everything I had experienced up until this very moment prepared me for the stage. God’s ultimate goal was to prepare me to push others to their places of excellence.

My dad would always urge me to accompany him to his speaking engagements, made me read certain books, and even gave me scriptural assignments. I would fight it all tooth and nail. As I stood on the stage, like so many times before, I realized that I was being prepared to be the same motivator as my father. Simply amazing! There is no greater moment than when you experience purpose live and in action. Better than that, there is no greater moment than when you feel close to someone you will never see again. For some reason, I felt him when I began to engage with the youth. The very same man that I weep over losing is the one that pushes me to excellence while I am on the stage. I knew the moment I put my hand on the mic, my father had his hand on my shoulder and my Heavenly Father was covering us both.

The loss of him propelled me to gain a greater understanding of who I am in Christ and in the world. I possessed my father’s humor and wit while channeling the intellect and insight my mother continues to instill in me. In that very moment today on stage, I felt at home. Because I was operating in my divine assignment, I had no free moments to weep because I working. I knew in that very moment that if I wanted my tears to stop falling, I had to continue to keep operating in purpose.

I have learned that in every life defining moment, there is a hidden opportunity. God employs unconventional methods to push us towards who He desires for us to be. He wants us to be great not matter what! Just because you feel lost, it doesn’t mean you can’t be found. God allows life’s defining movements to evoke: Visions... inspirations… opportunities… Sometimes it takes getting knocked off track to get you right back on track. What you need, you sow. If you need inspiration, be the one to sow it. It may be your destiny to push someone to theirs. That is my purpose, I am sure of it. God wants me to push others to higher heights while He is further cultivating me for the Kingdom.

While I am still healing and learning I am continuously seeking God. I know that I will not be the first person to feel lost or to lose a loved one. I refuse to let my pain serve as my “crutch’, it will act as my catalyst instead. I will be propelled further into my destiny by my defining moments. God will never take you to a place that He cannot dwell in. I know that I will always be covered no matter what I experience. So I take everything that I have experienced up until this very moment and I use it to bless others. I know that God is the ultimate author and finisher of my story so I will continue to let Him write it. It simply has to get better….He promised so.

Redefining my happy while allowing God to redefine who I am….

~Mel

Yesterday is Gone Now.....

I can remember vividly February 25, 2010… a year ago to this very date. I had recently decided to relinquish my ties with my old job, I was battling over my health insurance coverage, and debating on my next step. I sat at the breakfast table with my mom & dad and just wept. My tears were from a very, very deep place. They came from place of confusion, hurt, and misdirection. I simply did not know what God wanted me to do. After years of being that “somebody” to so many people, I was now the person that needed somebody. I can still feel my father’s hand on my shoulder assuring me that it was going to get better. I can hear his booming voice telling me that I just needed to keep believing. I looked in my father’s eyes and saw years of holding on to God’s promises. I saw a man so full of faith that it frightened me. I saw a man that held God to His every word and boldly approached the throne. I saw a man that knew that I was going to be ok as long as I kept holding on to what God said and what I had been taught. I was looking at a man that knew on February 26, 2010, that he would suffer a massive stroke and would never return to us.

You see, it took me a whole year to even write this. I can vividly remember everything about that day. My dad’s voice, his phone ringing, the TV being loud, making him a smoothie, him hugging me and saying “I love you”, him looking me directly in the eyes. Something about that day still shakes me to the core. The last day I would ever interact with one of my verfy best friends, confidant, and spiritual advisor, and Man of God. My dad was the type of man to love without limits. He wasn’t afraid to cry, show emotion, or let you know when he was hurting. He certainly lived every moment like it was his last. On this day, he knew that February 26, 2010 would be his last normal day on earth. I remember my phone coming alive with his ringer and his voice being slurred saying, “help…home… help”. As I helplessly asked him what was wrong, all his brain would allow to come out was “serious, home…help…my heart…”. My entire life came to a halt. My worst nightmare was my current reality. I couldn’t keep my composure My mom & I were 20minutes away from the house and couldn’t make it to him in time. I had to call the fire rescue to break in the house to get him. The remains of the broken door would be symbolic of my broken heart that still remains. It would be symbolic of our broken family structure. Symbolic of the broken pieces that would remain of our lives that we would have to find a way to put back together. The shattered pieces that would now belong to us forever. My best friend was taken from me in an instant and would never, ever return.

The devastation of losing a family member is something that is simply unexplainable. Losing the person who was ½ of reason why I was in earth was a tough reality to grasp. The pain of moving forward with life often halts me from flying. Feels like I have gorgeous wings that have been clipped. Having all the equipment to fly but somehow finding comfort in staying on the ground. Day by day I have been less and less afraid to fly high, but it’s the hardest trial I have ever had to face. When you can’t hear your biggest fan cheering in the stands, it feels like the game isn’t worth playing. I can still hear him saying “kill ‘em baby girl” whenever I would get dressed up to go speak or merely hang out with my friends. He always knew that I would one day have to fly without him. Wish it were just that easy to do.

While I know I will never be with him physically on earth again, his spirit lives on forever. Whether it is through his innovations, his sermons, his businesses, his jokes, through my mom & sisters, he will forever be a part of us. I can still hear him faintly when I find quiet moments to remember. My #1 fan now has the best seat in the house, in Heaven. He can now see it all (that’s pretty scary…lol). At this point, it’s all about moving toward his dream for me to be great and to make this grandson named Michael Anthony that we each promised we would give him. Lol. Well, that is after I marry this man that he kept talking about. My daddy was a true man of God. He described my husband to a T. Now if I could only meet (and marry) this man who remains a fictitious character at this point. (That’s a totally different blog post, so let me save that discussion before I go OFF!)

As I move forward with everything I have, I know that I have to rightfully claim my place in life. It would be a disservice to his memory and ultimately disrespecting God. I know that I need to cry and get through it, but I must steadily move. The thing I have learned about life is that it truly goes on. No matter the circumstances. The sun rises at its scheduled time and sets just the same. People die, more are born, and the cycle continues. People cry, laugh, get angry and get sad. Life moves forward with or without us. As I sit here a year later, a piece of me is still missing but I know I am going to be ok. God promised I would be.

What would you do if the yesterdays you possessed with someone would be all you had? What if you knew the last moment you shared with them would be your last moment you would ever share? I wish I knew. Maybe I would have said more, or even less, but I would have tried to capture everything I could and hold it all forever. At this juncture in life, I can’t live in what I thought yesterday should of possessed, I can only move on to make this very moment greater than the one before. Once we all have the courage to let those yesterdays go, we can maximize the tomorrows that will come.

Realizing My Yesterdays Are Gone And My Tomorrows Aren't Promised....

~Mel

Ode to 2010: Post 11 of 12

Lesson #10: Art of Letting Go

Letting go is one of the hardest lessons in life, but the most essential. -Me

There is great power in letting go. I think this is the most powerful lesson I had to learn totally against my will. I am often and transported back to March 12, 2010 at 3:50 pm at Emory University Hospital. This is where I witnessed my very best friend, prayer partner, spiritual father, laughing buddy, role model and father, be zipped up into a huge white Ziploc bag and shipped off to the morgue. (I have to be vivid because this paints my reality.) I stood there and watched this as an out of body experience. This moment was one that I dreaded all my life, but God saw fit for it to happen as a 27 year old woman a journey. I stood there and realized that all the memories I had were all the ones that I will ever have. I realized that all the stories, sermons, and pointers I would get to be a wife had already been given. I realized that transfer of favor was now a final transaction. I realized that his dreams were now mine to spread to the masses. I realized that I was no longer daddy’s girl, I was daddy’s woman. I had to realize that everything I was taught from 1982 would count in this very moment. I just stood there as God began to whisper in my ear, “Let go Mel, the time is now.” I had to turn around to look to see who else was in the room. I could feel my father’s spirit in the air. It was no longer in that white bag. That was just his peanut butter colored space suit (as he would call it). Man. This was the moment he prepared me for.

In that very poignant moment in my life, not one tear fell. I was still in somewhat of shock. I went through the motions of planning his funeral, picking out his 3 suits, calling all his friends, setting up accounts, choosing our wardrobe for all the services, coordinating with all the churches & funeral homes, cleaning out his car, and ironing out all the details for our new life. You name it, I did it effortlessly, still with no tears. This was probably one of the most defining moments in my life. This is where I knew God can give you the strength when you need it. I had to realize that daddy’s woman now had a lot of things to take care of. I had to let go of him on this side so he could get to kingdom business.

My life now is one that is not filled with a lot of rhetoric and foolishness. If I say it, I mean it. If I want it, I get it. If I love you, I love you for life. If I need a moment, I take it. If I believe it, God will make sure I receive it. If I need it, I already know it will be taken care of. I have let go of what I think normalcy is required to be. While I desire those rose colored glasses to view life from, I have chosen to put on the amour of the Lord and look towards the bigger picture. I am going to use every gift to the fullest extent, go on every trip, and live life to the edges of the earth. I am not afraid to love 100 times over. I have let go of what people have thought of me and (re) convinced myself of all that I have been destined to be. I have let go of the alleged singular path to greatness. I have let go of the idiosyncrasies of mediocrity and complacency. I have let go of the disappointments of love lost and love that still remained in my hand & heart. I have had to let it all go.

I now understand why eagles take their young to the highest peak to learn how to fly. Even if they fall short, they are still above so many others. I get it now. I see why my parents did all they did. I get it. I know why daddy transferred his anointing to me, why he gave me all of his passwords, why he constantly wanted to make everything a teaching moment, why he made me VP of his companies, why he shared all his dreams with me. He wanted me to fly….on my own. He took me to the highest peak and prepared me to fly. When I look up in the sky, I can see two huge peanut butter colored thumbs up and his saying, “That’s it baby girl”. That’s all I really need anyway.

Letting it all go so I can get what I need next,

~Mel

Don't Forget to Remember

Well, today is July 8, 2010, which would have been my father's 54th birthday. Needless to say that today was a little rough, initially, but I got through it. I think the comfort in knowing that my father was such a good man helps me daily. Knowing that he lived his life helping others and living life to the fullest, is pushing me to do the same. Days like this force me to remember and that's something that I vow never to forget to do.

So many times we go through life living in fast forward. Living for the day, not remembering where we've come from, what God has delivered us from and who we once were. We forget to remember. We forget those moments that have shaped us, those defining moments that were instrumental to who we have become, those moments that are forever in our hearts and minds.

Initially, I wanted to spend the day crying about missing my daddy and all the things I wanted to do, but God just wouldn't let me. I felt him all day. I could hear dad saying it was going to be ok and that I had all I needed to move forward in life. That's the thing about memories, they are more than moments in time, they are moments that create who we are today. When we tap into those moments from the past, those good moments, it's like an energy recharge. Wonderful feelings come rushing back in.

I know that I have to release my dad spiritually to the Heavens, but I will forever have him in my heart. All the teachings about being a dynamic woman of God, a wonderful wife, and an individual will forever resonate in my heart and mind. Days like today make me realize my memories are so rich that I have everything I need for the future. When I cry, it is not out of sadness, but out of celebration. Celebrating the memories that I was blessed with, as well the hope I have for the future.

I won't forget to remember all that I've had because I know it will prepare me for all that I will have :O)

Never forgetting to remember,

-Mel

Here is a video of my dad last year saying Happy Birthday to himself. Speechless every time I watch it.....

Someday may never come.....

I really didn't have much of a "theme" for today, but more of a talking point. I woke up this morning thinking about what I dreamt and all I could remember was the smell of my dad's cologne. In my dream, my dad was telling me that he missed me and that he wanted to share how to continue the business. By the time I woke up, it was all a blur. I just laid in bed and thought about all the moments we once shared and how he constantly wanted to make everything we did a "teaching" moment. It's like everything he taught me I am now in the midst of living out. Everything I've learned is everything I am.

In life, we collect experiences, capture images, and record conversations and they stay in our minds. They eventually shape our beliefs, our understandings, and our opinions. What we do becomes who we are. Everything that we go through is pivotal to who are. I think about all the people I've met, dated, loved, befriended, disliked, had issues with, and learned from, and it seems that I have taken a little bit of each of them with me. Each time I've walked away from a situation, I made sure that it was a "teaching" moment. That is what daddy taught me. It's important that you go through life as a student because eventually you will become a teacher.

This morning I texted a good friend of mine about my dream and he got excited for me. He said my dream was merely a reflection of what an incredible woman my dad raised. I was so touched. It's amazing how someone can see such greatness in you that you are often blind to. The most profound thing he shared was, "someday is another word for never". #message.... It's the truth. If I keep saying that I will "someday" carry on my dad's legacy, then I may never get to doing it. We always hope that "someday" finds its way to us, but many times it doesn't.

I just got off the phone with my mentor of almost 20 years and she was in tears. She told me that she was in Atlanta and wanted to get with me. I asked why she was in town, since she was from Miami, she said that her son-in-law had suddenly passed. He daughter and son-in-law were celebrating their 20th anniversary on Sunday and were preparing to go out on the town. He went to the couch to lay down for a sec while she got dressed. As she was in the shower, she heard him yell out her name. She ignored it the first time, but them heard it again. By the time she came in the living room, she found him face down on the floor. He had died of a massive heart attack on their anniversary. He was only 39 years old. They had been sweethearts. The doctors report said he had an enlarged heart and it decided to explode on that day. This was nothing short of heartbreaking.

I promise this was the saddest story I had heard in a very, very long time. It almost made me more at peace with my dad's story. At least I got 2 weeks to say good bye to him everyday instead of coming home to see him face down on the floor.

In life, you may not get another chance to say I love you, or good morning, or I miss you, you have to say it time you feel it. The next moment is not promised and we don't have forever. Say it right now.

Someday may never come, so relish in the day you have right now.

Hoping that my days make a difference.....

-Mel

Tribute to Big Poppa

(I can't really write this post without falling out on the ground, so bear with me. )

I wanted to take a moment to say I miss my daddy. Not for all the reasons that people may think. Well, maybe so. Yes I miss him being my prayer partner, my Dave Chappel/ Paul Mooney partner, my Tiny & Toya watcher, my late night riding homie, my fried fish confidant, my voice of reason, my laughing partner, my smoothie partner, my tennis/basketball/gym/walk around the neighborhood partner, my man of God. I think what I miss the most is his spirit to press forward. His spirit of holding on. His spirit to see the good in people. His ability to see straight through to the heart of a man.

I miss that so much as I get closer to becoming someone's wife. Someone's virtuous woman. Someone's "good thang". Someone's mother. As I become all that God has destined me to be. I just wish he could of seen where I am. Even in the past 4 months, I have become someone totally different. Nowhere near the same. The strength that I possess, I don't even know where it came from (well, I know it's from God). The ability I have now to see things that are to come, I wish I could talk to him about. I just wish I could say 2 or 3 more things to him. Ask him a few more questions. Have like one more deep conversation and walk away with a wealth of knowledge.

I will never understand God's timing, His reasoning, His way of thinking, I can only ask for a way to press forward. I pray that I someday am thought of as much as daddy is.

I look back over the 27 years I had with him and I can do nothing but cry. Tears of laughter, memories, prayers, and breakthroughs. I have had some great times with dad. He confided in me like I was one of his homies. To never have him again feels like I've lost an organ. I miss him more than words can ever encompass. I pray that God heals this pain and allows me to still be a blessing to others.

It's crazy, as soon as dad passed, I received a tsunami of proposals and interest from men that I have never imagined. I pray daily for dad to send some sort of sign that he has approved the man I decide to settle down with. I think that's the biggest thing right now. Not ever having him walk me down the aisle or helping me write my vows. Goodness, I just have to pray now for the strength.

Through my veil of tears, I see daddy smiling and saying, "I'm proud of you baby girl, go out there and kill 'em".

And that's the plan... to do it just like he was standing right behind me cheering me on, instead he's above.

Pray for me y'all. Today is going to be rough. ( Yup, my face is covered in tears)

-Mitch's Girl

Gone too soon.... On whose watch?

Disclaimer: Yeah, I know I am on this death/life talk a lot, but this is what happens when someone so critical to you leaves the earth. This is my way of healing, and plus, it's my blog, I can write about what I want.... so anyhoo, here is it...

I was talking to some of dad's friends the other day and they are still so very broke up. Saying daddy was "gone too soon", that he didn't deserve to die, and that they didn't know how they were going to be able to move on without him. I was like, "That was MY daddy, and I'm not saying any of those things, why are yall so broken?" So many things came to mind during these conversations. Did daddy get a glimpse of heaven and decide not to come back? Did he talk to God prior? Did he want to leave earth for paradise? Did he know?

All these questions have been answered through dreams, conversations with God and reading the word. You see, we are so caught up with our earthly assignments that we forget that we are merely on loan from heaven. Our eternal destinations. While we are all puzzled about the timing of dad's earthly departure, his expiration date had come up. It was merely his time to go back to his maker. It is the craziest thing, but its the only solace that I find in daddy being gone. He gets to go to a place that we can merely dream of. Imagine a place you envision as paradise times 1 million? Wouldn't that be incredible? Well, I think daddy saw that and threw up the "deuces" to us earthly folk.

I have been in a state of worship lately and in that time, I can literally feel the presence of my father. In the midst of my hands lifted up, I can feel,smell, and almost reach out and touch my dad. Yeah, it sounds weird, but its true. That's how I know he made it in. In the midst of praising God, I can feel my dad's spirit, which is what he exists as now. "To be absent from the body is to be in the presence of the Lord. " I used to hear people say that all the time, but honey, it' s real. God is so good. I can only imagine the great work daddy is doing up there. God must have some MAJOR stuff going up there he had to call home one of his generals to take up a new mantle.

That is why I can't be totally mad about him leaving to go be with God. My timing and God's timing are totally different. Where I watch the clock, God makes the clock tick. While I am flipping through a calendar, God allows the days and months to come and go. To gain understanding of why people leave earth too soon is really a way for God to urge us to get closer to him. In seeking answers, we merely need to seek his face.

The reason I cry is because I will forever miss the presence of my daddy. I can't hide that fact or that pain. But I know, in God's timing, will come healing and understanding. In the meantime, I will continue to press forward and be the woman I was ordained and set aside to be.

I miss you daddy, but I know you are in heaven sending some "hook-ups" my way.

In love and understanding,

Mel

My Father's Business

So, these past few weeks have been tough to say the least, but time has revealed that there is a great work that needs to be done in the earth. I have had the opportunity to have my dad the longest out of all his daughters and I have truly been blessed as a result. In my 27 years, I have witnessed my father dream without measure. He would think of something and immediately be able to execute it. Above all his dreams, talents, projects, and ventures, he just wanted to be remembered. To be celebrated. It came to me as I was going through all of his tapes, his jerseys, his designs on his computer, and all of his stuff he left behind. Goodness. How will I be able to carry his legacy on? How can I assure that the world never forgets my daddy? It is so much. God began to speak and this is what He said..... "He may be gone in body, but he left some great works to be done in the earth and YOU have to do them."

-pause-

"Me.... God, you can't be for real. I can't do all the things THE Michael Mitchell did. He was a genius."...

I could literally hear God laughing out loud, weirdest thing. You see, so many times we get caught up in the abilities and success of a person, without giving true regard to the person who gave them the ability to do all these things. I kept hearing Philippians 4:13 resonate throughout my mind, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me". Every time I looked at one of dad's many inventions or innovations, I was in awe. All the things he was able to accomplish was simply a result of having an intimate relationship with God. Not because he went to Harvard, not because he trained at Julliard, not because he went to MIT, but because he took the time to be before the Lord.

You see, as we are afforded a new mornings daily, and God's mercies are renewed, we should make it our business to give God the glory and ask for ALL that we need. Whether it be a parking space at the mall, to a cancer diagnosis being turned around, to getting approval on a new house or scholarship, or even the finances to survive during a so-called recession. God can do all things because he's BEEN doing all things. God is not a man that He should lie. ( And Lord knows there are a bunch of lying men... that's another post... lol)

Tomorrow will make 1 full month since my father went home to the ultimate paradise. Where there is no pain, no lies, no guilt, no disappointment. Where my grandmother and my great grandparents are, his best friends that left too soon, and even people that he dreamed to one day meet. Man, one full month without Michael Mitchell on the earth. You couldn't have told me on January 1, 2010, that I would only have 3 months to soak up all the daddy I could. I would of told you that you were a bold face lie. lol. But it seems as though daddy knew. 2 weeks before his stroke, he transferred his anointing to me ....DOUBLE. It was so random that it took me off guard. He rubbed both of my hands and prayed over me. He kept stressing to me the importance of time and precious moments. He gave me all of his passwords, names of his best friends, favorite songs, and how to run all of his businesses. Yea, he knew.

So, in these next critical days in my life, I must continue to carry on my father's business. His business of changing lives, loving God's children, being creative & innovative, making "out of the box" jersey & t-shirt designs, and doing the works of the Lord. My dad has prepared me to be heir to his throne as a baby. He sowed countless hours in prayer and special moments in me so I could spiritually move forward with all that he has left behind. I will now: act as President of his companies, be my mother's full time backbone, be a great parental support to my little sisters, and definitely step up my intimate relationship with God.

For you see, it's not all about the earthly education and training that prepares you for your destiny, but instead, it comes from being set aside and spending countless hours before the Lord in prayer and praise. At 27, I will be able to stand amongst giants in the body because I know that is who my father prayed for me to be.

Fast forward 1 year from now, who knows what God would have done. As I continue to carry out my father's business by doing the heavenly Father's business, I know that I am walking in purpose....

In steadfast prayer,

Mel

You Can't Take It All With You: Rest in Piece...

Well, it seems as if I am getting more and more revelations as I sleep. Honestly, I think its my dad working in cohorts with God. Those two are NOT letting me sleep... lol. Guess that's a good thing, I have an insider's tip on life now more than ever.

As I was laying partially awake, I kept hearing "rest in peace". I was like, yeah, rest in peace daddy. Then I heard, "no, not PEACE, but PIECE". Rest in PIECE. -pause- Piece. Let me reveal what God has told me....

Our lives rest upon the legacy that we choose to leave in the earth. Whether we are allotted the seventy plus seven years God promised, or if God decides to call us home a little earlier. We have to maximize the time we've been given. When God began to reveal to me "rest in piece", he told me that we are only to leave a "piece" of ourselves to be placed in the ground, the rest should be left throughout the world, the people we meet, the projects we complete, and the works we've done.

In 1 Timothy 4:14 it says, "Do not neglect your gift which was given you through a prophetic message when the body of elders laid hands on you." Now that gift (or gifts) that has been placed in you is for all of those around you. God has given a portion that is to bless others. What's the use of possessing an angelic voice if all you do is sing in the shower. Should you not sing in a choir? Visit nursing homes & hospitals to sing? To write music to change lives? You see, when you have a specific gift, there is a specific need for the Kingdom that only YOU can meet.

I look back on my father's life and marvel at all he was able to accomplish, all the people he was able to meet, and all the dreams he was able to live out. It's amazing. He was able to reach the drug addict on the corner, all the way to the rich man's widow. There wasn't a soul he didn't feel he couldn't reach. He was able to write over 500 songs, create jerseys the world has never seen, and see things in the spirit that only God could reveal. It was because he chose to not bury his talents in the ground. He chose to surrender. Totally. He knew that when the March 12, 2010 (his death) of his life would come, he would hear job well done my son.

Dad did not use the excuses of having a non-existent father, being the product of a single mother struggling, being mistreated or misunderstood, or even feeling lonely. He knew that all his brain possessed, the world needed. He knew that when his trumpet was sounded to come back home, God would have done a complete work in him.

Two weeks before my dad suffered his massive stroke, he pulled me to the side and said he wanted to pray for me. I was like, "Dad, I'm headed to a photoshoot, what's up." He kept saying, "we don't have a lot of time baby girl, I need to impart some things to you." As we sat at the breakfast table, I saw something behind his eyes, the earthly life he lived was coming to an end. At that moment, I didn't know what I was beginning to witness, but God was increasing his spiritual man, while decreasing his earthly man. Dad did something strange, he said, "I want to anoint you before you leave. I want to decree and declare a double portion of my anointing. All that God has given me spiritually, I want you to have double that." I was at a loss for words. I didn't understand it, but now I do. Dad knew. In that very moment, he knew that his clock was ticking and it was only a matter of time before he would go home to be with his heavenly Father. He knew he couldn't take that anointing to the ground with him, it would be of no use. He knew more souls needed to be saved. He knew more music needed to be made. He knew more jerseys needed to be designed. He knew more speeches needed to be given. He knew.

You see, when we all close our eyes and rest in "piece" we don't need to take anything with us. None of our ideas, our innovations, our songs, our business plans, our anointing, and our giftings. There are things that God has placed in us that are meant for earth. These things are meant to bless people and bring them to the kingdom. It is not a coincidence that Dad was able to impart his anointing on me in his final days. It is no coincidence that you are reading this right now. God is a God of RIGHT NOW! He wants us to make a change right now and he wants us to begin to live right now. No longer is it ok to sit on our talents, ideas, and giftings anymore. We must make use of them right now.

When you lay down each night and ask for forgiveness of your sins, ask Him what you are to leave in the earth. Ask God to show you what He saw you doing. Begin to envision yourself changing lives one person at a time. Make it your business to be a blessing to someone, from a baby in the nursery, to a mega millionaire, to a difficult client, to a loved one that you have been estranged from, or even your boss that you know doesn't care for you much. You will be amazed at what power love possesses. Leave pieces of you all along the way, so when you rest in peace, you are merely resting in "piece", because your spirit will resonate all throughout the world.

I leave you with this quote:

"Hide not your talents, they for use were made. What's a sun-dial in the shade?"

- Benjamin Franklin

Living in peace by leaving pieces all along the way...

-Mel

Rest in Peace Big Poppa: Daddy Died So That I May Live

Well, I guess everyone has been wondering where I have been and what's been up. Well, long story short, my father passed on March 12, 2010 at 3:42 pm. My life has been changed forever. I lost my best friend, my teacher, my pastor, my prayer partner, and my daddy. Forever. Words cannot express the amount of emotions that I have experienced during this time. From sadness to despair to depression to frustration and even anger. I've asked God 1,000 times why. I even asked dad why. No answer came. All I can do is keep living.





So, dad's death has taught me 3 things.....

- Reflect

- Move Forward

- To live....



Journey with me for a moment.



In reflecting, Ive realized so many things: What I once had and what I know how to do. What Ive learned. What Ive remembered. What I now possess. What I must perfect.

I now look back on all my dad has taught me and realize that Ive somehow captured it all. I can vividly remember the talks we've had, the late night drives we've taken and the lessons he has taught me. In remembering who my dad was, I know who I must become. Attending his memorial services, hearing what people had to say about him, and reading all that was written, I was in the presence of greatness for 27 years. For that, I praise the most High. I am eternally grateful.



As I look back over my own life, I have reevaluated what I spend time on and with who. As we race against this clock called life, we cannot spend precious moments on trivial people and things. We must make conscious decisions to be who God has called us to be. No longer is it ok to waste time on things that don't bring us closer to our destiny and to God. When your number is called, what do you want to be caught doing? Reflect on that.



Funny how it takes death for us to live......



Secondly, I've learned that you must move on... From people, things, hurts, pains, places of confusion, all of that. Time is not given to be wasted. I look back on what is considered to be Daddy's last days and all I can remember him saying is, "Baby girl, don't let those people rent space in your head, you're too valuable to the kingdom for that." That makes so much sense. Many times our breakthroughs come from letting go. How can God fill our hands with anything new when we are still holding on to the old stuff?

Death hasn't served as an epihpany for me, but merely as a reminder.........

We can't keep expecting a breakthrough when we refuse to let things go. Since about January, my dad would pick up the phone and call random people in his phone book. He would call them to encourage them, speak into their lives, pray with them, and get things right. The moment he did that, his speaking calendar began to fill up, people began to sow into his life, he began to feel better than he had in years. All because he chose to surrender to God's will and bless others. Letting things go gave him freedom. Gave him life. I'm trying to do the same. Trying.

Just because I want to transform, doesn't mean it will happen over night. Change is a process that I must actively pursue and participate in.

I look at the people that did daddy wrong. (I've even confronted a few... so what... lol). Lied to him. Mistreated him. Gave him broken promises. You name it. And I have to manage to let it all go. The funeral was my true test. I think I probably got a B-. I'm still a work in progress. I have to let it go. I know, I know. For daddy's sake and for my own breakthrough. I have to be honest, this is tough. Somewhere along the way, I have to leave it right there along the way. Just not worth carrying. The weight of carrying on a legacy is far more than enough on its own. So I must keep moving. You only add value to a negative person/situation/memory by holding on to it. It's almost like they won if you do. But if you release it, guess what? You WIN!

Lastly, daddy died so that we, his girls, could live. He showed us that within the years you've been given, you have to end each day on zero. Which means you've given 1000% to the day. No matter what was thrown dad's way, he always gave God the glory. He knew that at the end of the day, God would have the final say. Dad found a way to make every experience a teaching point. He believed what you didn't have in money/influence, God would double in favor. And he lived his life that way every day. He didn't just talk about being saved, he WAS saved. He did it. He didn't just teach us how to make a marriage work, he showed us. He didn't just teach us how to live out our dreams, he showed us by doing it himself. You see, dad lived to the point where each day had its own story. He showed us what living was. So even in his death, he's forcing us to live. When you get a glimpse of that invisible clock on the wall and you begin to hear the faint "tick-tock", you know that this thing called life is no longer game. At least not a game that you should plan on losing.

I think, all in all, I will never, ever forget my very best friend. My daddy. All that's he's taught me, all that he's shown me, all the prayers he's prayed over me, the dreams he had for me, his encouraging smile, and his legacy that I must press forward to carry. Most of all, I will cherish all that he has taught me just by living. Even the last day I talked to him he asked me if I had enough faith to believe God for a massive miracle. I said yes, and he told me that it's already been done, God was just waiting on me. That was the last time we would ever speak. On February 26, 2010 at 2:38 pm, my dad suffered a major stroke, and was never the Michael Anthony Mitchell I knew. He came back for a moment at the hospital, looked in my eyes, and I saw his spirit go back towards the heavens. Right then I knew that was it. My daddy had handed over his mantle and it was time to be a big girl. I will never be the same. Man **pause** I am still living as if I will wake up and my life would be different. That daddy would still be here. Im in total disbelief that I won't hear my name being hollered across the house. Or that I will never get an encouraging text from him. Or that I will never get a huge bear hug. Or that I won't have my best friend to walk me down the aisle. Wheeew, I just can't believe it.

But, reality is what it is and daddy would want me to rise up like a Spartan and continue carrying on the legacy he's already made. my mantle feels heavy, but he knew I would be able to carry it. Now I have two fathers looking down on me.

Lights! Camera! Action! Time to truly live, because daddy died. Time to do the things he has instructed and the things he desired to do. All I can do is live.....

-Mel