::::: House of Flyness :::::

Please Visit My New Site--> www.houseofflyness.com

2011-03-21T21:04:00.000-07:00

Hello lovely followers, readers, supporters, and all others. I have been wondering why I haven't heard from a lot of my favorite people. lol. Clearly I forgot to announce the launch of my new and improved site----> http://www.houseofflyness.com/. I have about 25 new posts that you all would absolutely love and identify with. I pray that they will minister to you and encourage you. 2011 has been an interesting year that I thank God that I was able to witness it. I know that they are great things to come. Please follow my journey so I can share my stories with you.

Let me know what you think of the site.... be encouraged :O)

~Mel

Redefining My Happy & Taking the Stage

2011-02-24T18:24:00.000-08:00

In searching for my next “big thing” in life, I have been redefining my happy. One of the hardest things to do, but the most necessary.

In life, we experience a myriad of things that truly help define who we are. We learn the things that make us happy, sad, angry, and indifferent. Life gives us things that we may or may not be able to change, but we can control how we react to it all. I sit back and remember my 2010 and realize that God allowed me to become greater than ever before. Never would I have imagined facing some of the trials that I have, but certainly, I have become a better version of myself.
I have slowly learned how to process each crisis I am faced with and try to walk away with a lesson. Don’t get me wrong, it is NEVER easy to press through a tough situation. I probably cry just about every day, but I dry my tears and get to the next moment. I don’t ever sugarcoat how I feel. While I don’t take my frustrations out on others, I am very transparent about the emotions I am experiencing. I think when you’re honest with true friends, they can help you walk through it. Many people may not understand your journey, but it is ok. God knows you better than anyone. I always take at least 30 minutes to an hour to spend alone with God. Whether it’s through worshipping or reading the word, I always make an effort to be ministered to. Intimate moments with Him fill you in ways you can never imagine. Many times, all you need is a quiet moment to recharge.

Today I had the opportunity to speak to about 300 kids about bullying, following their dreams, and helping them to define their passions in life. As I stood on stage, I literally had an out of body experience. I have spoken to youth for many years, so this was no new thing for me. Something about this day was very unique. I simply was not by myself up there. I felt the presence of God and my earthly father all at once. It hit me! This is where I am supposed to be. This is where it all came together. This is what God wants me to keep doing. Everything I had experienced up until this very moment prepared me for the stage. God’s ultimate goal was to prepare me to push others to their places of excellence.

My dad would always urge me to accompany him to his speaking engagements, made me read certain books, and even gave me scriptural assignments. I would fight it all tooth and nail. As I stood on the stage, like so many times before, I realized that I was being prepared to be the same motivator as my father. Simply amazing! There is no greater moment than when you experience purpose live and in action. Better than that, there is no greater moment than when you feel close to someone you will never see again. For some reason, I felt him when I began to engage with the youth. The very same man that I weep over losing is the one that pushes me to excellence while I am on the stage. I knew the moment I put my hand on the mic, my father had his hand on my shoulder and my Heavenly Father was covering us both.

The loss of him propelled me to gain a greater understanding of who I am in Christ and in the world. I possessed my father’s humor and wit while channeling the intellect and insight my mother continues to instill in me. In that very moment today on stage, I felt at home. Because I was operating in my divine assignment, I had no free moments to weep because I working. I knew in that very moment that if I wanted my tears to stop falling, I had to continue to keep operating in purpose.

I have learned that in every life defining moment, there is a hidden opportunity. God employs unconventional methods to push us towards who He desires for us to be. He wants us to be great not matter what! Just because you feel lost, it doesn’t mean you can’t be found. God allows life’s defining movements to evoke: Visions... inspirations… opportunities… Sometimes it takes getting knocked off track to get you right back on track. What you need, you sow. If you need inspiration, be the one to sow it. It may be your destiny to push someone to theirs. That is my purpose, I am sure of it. God wants me to push others to higher heights while He is further cultivating me for the Kingdom.

While I am still healing and learning I am continuously seeking God. I know that I will not be the first person to feel lost or to lose a loved one. I refuse to let my pain serve as my “crutch’, it will act as my catalyst instead. I will be propelled further into my destiny by my defining moments. God will never take you to a place that He cannot dwell in. I know that I will always be covered no matter what I experience. So I take everything that I have experienced up until this very moment and I use it to bless others. I know that God is the ultimate author and finisher of my story so I will continue to let Him write it. It simply has to get better….He promised so.

Redefining my happy while allowing God to redefine who I am….

~Mel

Yesterday is Gone Now.....

2011-02-24T17:58:00.000-08:00

I can remember vividly February 25, 2010… a year ago to this very date. I had recently decided to relinquish my ties with my old job, I was battling over my health insurance coverage, and debating on my next step. I sat at the breakfast table with my mom & dad and just wept. My tears were from a very, very deep place. They came from place of confusion, hurt, and misdirection. I simply did not know what God wanted me to do. After years of being that “somebody” to so many people, I was now the person that needed somebody. I can still feel my father’s hand on my shoulder assuring me that it was going to get better. I can hear his booming voice telling me that I just needed to keep believing. I looked in my father’s eyes and saw years of holding on to God’s promises. I saw a man so full of faith that it frightened me. I saw a man that held God to His every word and boldly approached the throne. I saw a man that knew that I was going to be ok as long as I kept holding on to what God said and what I had been taught. I was looking at a man that knew on February 26, 2010, that he would suffer a massive stroke and would never return to us.

You see, it took me a whole year to even write this. I can vividly remember everything about that day. My dad’s voice, his phone ringing, the TV being loud, making him a smoothie, him hugging me and saying “I love you”, him looking me directly in the eyes. Something about that day still shakes me to the core. The last day I would ever interact with one of my verfy best friends, confidant, and spiritual advisor, and Man of God. My dad was the type of man to love without limits. He wasn’t afraid to cry, show emotion, or let you know when he was hurting. He certainly lived every moment like it was his last. On this day, he knew that February 26, 2010 would be his last normal day on earth. I remember my phone coming alive with his ringer and his voice being slurred saying, “help…home… help”. As I helplessly asked him what was wrong, all his brain would allow to come out was “serious, home…help…my heart…”. My entire life came to a halt. My worst nightmare was my current reality. I couldn’t keep my composure My mom & I were 20minutes away from the house and couldn’t make it to him in time. I had to call the fire rescue to break in the house to get him. The remains of the broken door would be symbolic of my broken heart that still remains. It would be symbolic of our broken family structure. Symbolic of the broken pieces that would remain of our lives that we would have to find a way to put back together. The shattered pieces that would now belong to us forever. My best friend was taken from me in an instant and would never, ever return.

The devastation of losing a family member is something that is simply unexplainable. Losing the person who was ½ of reason why I was in earth was a tough reality to grasp. The pain of moving forward with life often halts me from flying. Feels like I have gorgeous wings that have been clipped. Having all the equipment to fly but somehow finding comfort in staying on the ground. Day by day I have been less and less afraid to fly high, but it’s the hardest trial I have ever had to face. When you can’t hear your biggest fan cheering in the stands, it feels like the game isn’t worth playing. I can still hear him saying “kill ‘em baby girl” whenever I would get dressed up to go speak or merely hang out with my friends. He always knew that I would one day have to fly without him. Wish it were just that easy to do.

While I know I will never be with him physically on earth again, his spirit lives on forever. Whether it is through his innovations, his sermons, his businesses, his jokes, through my mom & sisters, he will forever be a part of us. I can still hear him faintly when I find quiet moments to remember. My #1 fan now has the best seat in the house, in Heaven. He can now see it all (that’s pretty scary…lol). At this point, it’s all about moving toward his dream for me to be great and to make this grandson named Michael Anthony that we each promised we would give him. Lol. Well, that is after I marry this man that he kept talking about. My daddy was a true man of God. He described my husband to a T. Now if I could only meet (and marry) this man who remains a fictitious character at this point. (That’s a totally different blog post, so let me save that discussion before I go OFF!)

As I move forward with everything I have, I know that I have to rightfully claim my place in life. It would be a disservice to his memory and ultimately disrespecting God. I know that I need to cry and get through it, but I must steadily move. The thing I have learned about life is that it truly goes on. No matter the circumstances. The sun rises at its scheduled time and sets just the same. People die, more are born, and the cycle continues. People cry, laugh, get angry and get sad. Life moves forward with or without us. As I sit here a year later, a piece of me is still missing but I know I am going to be ok. God promised I would be.

What would you do if the yesterdays you possessed with someone would be all you had? What if you knew the last moment you shared with them would be your last moment you would ever share? I wish I knew. Maybe I would have said more, or even less, but I would have tried to capture everything I could and hold it all forever. At this juncture in life, I can’t live in what I thought yesterday should of possessed, I can only move on to make this very moment greater than the one before. Once we all have the courage to let those yesterdays go, we can maximize the tomorrows that will come.

Realizing My Yesterdays Are Gone And My Tomorrows Aren't Promised....

~Mel

Ode To 2010: Post 12 of 12

2010-12-22T21:00:00.000-08:00

Well, what can truly be said about a year that has singlehandedly changed a course 27 years in the making? So very, very much MUST be said. When I approached this year, I was filled with an uneasy level of expectancy, trepidation, and millions of butterflies in my stomach. I looked at my dream board from this year and read the letter I wrote myself. All I kept saying was, “This is my year. This is my year. This is my year.” Nowhere in that letter did I mention that I would sever ties with my job. Never did I mention that I would lose my dad the second month of the year. Never in that letter did I mention that I would meet some of the most incredible men. Never in that letter did I mention that I would see people for who they really were and eliminate many from my life. Never. Never did I mention that I would be the beacon of light for so many others while enduring some of my life’s toughest trials, never. Somehow, God knew and He prepared me for 27 years.

2010 has been a year of many lessons, trials, tribulations, triumphs, and moments of clarity. My account of this year would be severely jumbled up if I didn’t categorize them to some extent. I have decided to pick the top 10 lessons that I’ve learned this year. Take out your pen & pad, tissue, popcorn, and your phone. This will be enlightening, emotional, entertaining, and fill you will epiphanies. When you finish reading this, you will truly know why I will never be the same. Here goes it……

Flying High Above It All....

~Mel

Ode to 2010: Post 11 of 12

2010-12-22T20:57:00.001-08:00

Lesson #10: Art of Letting Go

Letting go is one of the hardest lessons in life, but the most essential. -Me

There is great power in letting go. I think this is the most powerful lesson I had to learn totally against my will. I am often and transported back to March 12, 2010 at 3:50 pm at Emory University Hospital. This is where I witnessed my very best friend, prayer partner, spiritual father, laughing buddy, role model and father, be zipped up into a huge white Ziploc bag and shipped off to the morgue. (I have to be vivid because this paints my reality.) I stood there and watched this as an out of body experience. This moment was one that I dreaded all my life, but God saw fit for it to happen as a 27 year old woman a journey. I stood there and realized that all the memories I had were all the ones that I will ever have. I realized that all the stories, sermons, and pointers I would get to be a wife had already been given. I realized that transfer of favor was now a final transaction. I realized that his dreams were now mine to spread to the masses. I realized that I was no longer daddy’s girl, I was daddy’s woman. I had to realize that everything I was taught from 1982 would count in this very moment. I just stood there as God began to whisper in my ear, “Let go Mel, the time is now.” I had to turn around to look to see who else was in the room. I could feel my father’s spirit in the air. It was no longer in that white bag. That was just his peanut butter colored space suit (as he would call it). Man. This was the moment he prepared me for.

In that very poignant moment in my life, not one tear fell. I was still in somewhat of shock. I went through the motions of planning his funeral, picking out his 3 suits, calling all his friends, setting up accounts, choosing our wardrobe for all the services, coordinating with all the churches & funeral homes, cleaning out his car, and ironing out all the details for our new life. You name it, I did it effortlessly, still with no tears. This was probably one of the most defining moments in my life. This is where I knew God can give you the strength when you need it. I had to realize that daddy’s woman now had a lot of things to take care of. I had to let go of him on this side so he could get to kingdom business.

My life now is one that is not filled with a lot of rhetoric and foolishness. If I say it, I mean it. If I want it, I get it. If I love you, I love you for life. If I need a moment, I take it. If I believe it, God will make sure I receive it. If I need it, I already know it will be taken care of. I have let go of what I think normalcy is required to be. While I desire those rose colored glasses to view life from, I have chosen to put on the amour of the Lord and look towards the bigger picture. I am going to use every gift to the fullest extent, go on every trip, and live life to the edges of the earth. I am not afraid to love 100 times over. I have let go of what people have thought of me and (re) convinced myself of all that I have been destined to be. I have let go of the alleged singular path to greatness. I have let go of the idiosyncrasies of mediocrity and complacency. I have let go of the disappointments of love lost and love that still remained in my hand & heart. I have had to let it all go.

I now understand why eagles take their young to the highest peak to learn how to fly. Even if they fall short, they are still above so many others. I get it now. I see why my parents did all they did. I get it. I know why daddy transferred his anointing to me, why he gave me all of his passwords, why he constantly wanted to make everything a teaching moment, why he made me VP of his companies, why he shared all his dreams with me. He wanted me to fly….on my own. He took me to the highest peak and prepared me to fly. When I look up in the sky, I can see two huge peanut butter colored thumbs up and his saying, “That’s it baby girl”. That’s all I really need anyway.

Letting it all go so I can get what I need next,

~Mel

Ode to 2010: Post 10 of 12

2010-12-22T20:51:00.000-08:00

Lesson #9: Keep Dreaming and Believing

The thing about dreams is that at some point we have to wake up and live them….. -Me

Do you possess the ability to dream without measure? Do you think you possess the power to dream when everyone says your dream is not going to happen? Do you think you’re able to hold on to what God promised when it looks like it will never happen? Do you think all your believing has been in vain? Do you think what you want is too much to ask? Do you think you’re worthy of all your dreams coming true? Can you believe? These are some of the questions that I often ask myself.

I think about the numerous dream boards I’ve made, the promises God has told me, the things I have been told by prophets, and I’m like, “God are you sure?”. Sometimes my reality doesn’t always directly correlate with my dreams and I am often baffled. In my moments of doubt, I immediately have to rebuke the enemy. That’s often when breakthrough comes. When I feel like I am about to fail, I have to go to God in prayer. I have to find a way to ignore what I see and understand that what I don’t see is working on my behalf. I literally have to repeat out loud “Walk by faith and not by sight” over and over again. Once I get this mantra back reprogrammed into my spirit, God shows up.

I have really, really had to walk by faith this year. Leaving a job, having to survive, wanting to still bless others, and just trying to remain significant, I have had quite a journey. Through all of my struggles, I can say God is good. When God says He will grant you your daily bread, He is not a man that He should lie. I really, really wish I could tell you everything that I have triumphed over and been able to get the victory in. Every time I needed a bill paid, or a sign, God wasn’t slow to move. I can recount numerous times where I said, “mom, God is about to send a check in the mail”, and within days it came into fruition. I know God is real. The moment I try to doubt His ability to work it out, I am reminded of how He showed up before.

My spirituality has been heightened in the midst of my life’s greatest storm. I have seen God move in the spiritual realm right before my eyes. Words cannot express the way I feel right now.
When you are at your lowest, God should be lifted the highest. Nothing is too hard for God, nothing. If something doesn’t work out the way you thought it would, then God has a different plan, He has to.

I have learned to not stop dreaming and believing. Yes, I will be disappointed. Yes, I will have to leave some people in my past. Yes, I will have to walk about from situations that seem ideal. Yes, I will encounter doubt. Yes, I will want to throw in the towel in more ways than one. Yes, I will feel like the weight of the world rests on my shoulders. Yes, people will think I am crazy for believing beyond what I see. But honey, let me tell you, none of that matters when God is in the driver’s seat. I have learned that I have to stop listening to what others say and even some of my own thoughts. The best way to get answers is to be silent. I have had to find a way to get to God through prayer and supplication. I pray about it, write about, and wait on it. Some answers are more explicit while others take a little longer to come. I know that when God has told or showed me something I have to move in that direction or everything else will fail. With God, I am ok. I have learned that when everything else fades away, we will always have God, and that’s more than enough.

Not going to stop dreaming and believing,

~Mel

Ode To 2010: Post 9 of 12

2010-12-22T20:43:00.000-08:00

Lesson #8: Perspective

Sometimes you just have to let go of what's in your hand to see what you were holding on to. It's worth will be revealed in time- Me

It’s not about what you’re looking at, it’s about how you see it. Life is all about perspective. The moment you change the way you look at something, you possess the power to change it. While you may not be able to change having a job just yet, you can definitely view it as the possibility of having freedom to live out your dreams and truly decide what you want to do with your life. While you might not be able to change the fact that someone didn’t see greatness in you, you can see the possibility of working to become even greater. You may feel that you are not exactly where you want to be, but you have to see the possibility of dreaming above the possibilities that currently exist. Of course it is always easier said than done, but why not use your time wisely?

I believe struggle is by design. God doesn’t want us to suffer, but He wants us to get the lesson. It is important that we view our journey as class in session. We should constantly evolve and be open to learn something new. Each experience we encounter is designed to make us better. Whether it is the loss of a loved one, a loss of a love, a loss of a job, a loss of a desire, whatever it is, God can use it all for His glory. Believe me, I have taken each one of these paths and I can tell you that there is always a silver lining.

I often speak of my dad being gone because it is a part of my daily journey. While he is gone in body, I can feel him in spirit. I have had to take the loss of him in stride, but with my head held high. In the most defining moment in my life, God placed me on a platform for others to see. For some reason, I have been the beacon of light for so many others. Never would I imagine ministering to people all over the world, but somehow God saw fit. It is often in your place of hurt where your calling can be found. When you’ve been to your life’s lowest moment, you garner an uncanny ability to be transparent and an ability to speak with a different voice.

Understanding your seasons is key to transitioning to each new level in life. This is a concept that I have had to grasp quickly, especially when dealing with love. I think about how I’ve loved and learned and had to move on quickly. I think about the men I’ve dated, the things I’ve learned, and how I’ve grown as a result of our time together. I’ve had to take all that we were, record the lessons to memory, and move quickly. It is important to understand what God is doing in your life and who He may send on your path. A person’s purpose in your life may merely be to show you all that you deserve and what you should demand. Someone may come in your life to merely show you that what you desire exists but may come in a different package. Someone may come in your life to help you through a difficult season. Someone may come in your life to keep your spirits held high. You may never know the true purpose of a person’s season in your life until their season has ended. Some reasons come days later, some weeks & months, and some even years. Once you grasp the concept of seasons coming and going, you can move fluidly through life.

It’s hard to move on when you’re constantly living in regret, so don’t. Understand that the decisions you’ve made have been made and the only ones you can control are the one that you will make. See life as a chess game. Move strategically and understand the weight of every move. While you are not able to take months and years to make some decisions, you still have the ability to make the best ones. The way I look at life now is totally different. I have decided that each step I take has already been ordained. The closer I stay to God, the easier decisions are to make. I look to God for answers. If God is in me, then I don’t have to look very far.

Seeing things in a different way changes what I see,

~Mel

Ode to 2010: Post 8 of 12

2010-12-22T20:32:00.001-08:00

Lesson #7: Fear

"The key to change .......is to let go of fear" - Rosanne Cash

I remember when I was younger I had a laundry list of things I was fearful of: the dark, certain animals, losing someone I loved, tall trees, dark alleys, failing, being alone, and not being happy. Well, as I got older, I had to face a lot of those fears, well, all of them. While losing my dad was something I thought I could never face, I managed to persevere through it. Amongst all the other things on my list of ‘fears’, I realized that they were all mental. Once I decided that my fears were no greater than me, I was able to rise above them.

One of the greatest lessons I have learned in life is that, fear is the opposite of faith. My mom, who serves as my BFF and my spiritual advisor, always stresses that fear cancels out faith. Why pray when you’re going to dwell on what on your issues all day? Why place something on the alter if you keep going back to get it? Why tell God that you are trusting Him but you’re laying awake at night fretting over what you’ve given Him? Fear sends the message to God that you don’t trust Him to handle it.

Facing your fears allows you to move forward. Within the last 12 months, I have had to look my fears directly in the face. I’ve look in the mirror and said this daily, “No matter how big or small, the God in me is bigger than them all.”

I look back over the things I have triumphed over and I am overwhelmed at how God has kept me. He has literally carried me from faith to faith. Every time I thought I would easily crumble or not make it, He has rescued me. I always say, “God will give you what you need when you need it.” Whether it be a person, place, situation, or decision, whatever you have need of in that very moment, God will send it. So we must fear not, everything has already been taken care of.

Knowing fear is the opposite of faith,

~Mel

Ode to 2010: Post 7 of 12

2010-12-22T20:20:00.000-08:00

Lesson#6: Time

Ecclesiastes 3:1-15

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:
A time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot,
A time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build,
A time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance,
A time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
A time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away,
A time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak,
A time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.
What does the worker gain from his toil?
I have seen the burden God has laid on men.
He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end.
I know that there is nothing better for men than to be happy and do good while they live.
That everyone may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all his toil--this is the gift of God.
I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that men will revere him.
Whatever is has already been, and what will be has been before; and God will call the past to account.

The thing about time is that it keeps moving whether you are or not. The world keeps spinning. People keep moving. Life continues to forge ahead. Whether you decide to stand in the very same spot or not, the world will continue to move on without you.

Time doesn’t always heal, it merely pushes the reality of when a moment happened. The more I live through my life’s trials, I realized that time doesn’t (always)heal, but God does. The more you live, God will begin to do a special work through you. Indeed, everything takes times, but above all, it takes God to complete that work in you. So healing is merely a decision and I’ve decided to let God do a great work in me. God doesn’t operate in the measure of time that’s common to us, so we need only find the strength day to day to make it to that breakthrough .

This year, I have learned that “me time” is essential to survival. You have to find a place where you can be with just you. If you’re like me, the world can sometimes be louder than your own voice. It happens to the best of us. I should be married, I should have kids, I should live here, I should make this, I should be with this type of man, I should be doing this, I should know this, I should be going here, etc. All of these preconceived notions that are frivolous in the grander scheme of things. I have had to stop holding on to what I think, to understand what I am to know. I will let that marinate. Lol. Stopping holding on to what you think and hold on to what you know God has promised. Many times we think we have it all figured out and then God shows us a total different, uncharted path. The times where we receive this top secret blueprint is during those quiet moments with God.

I have truly learned the art of loving God in silence. I just sit very still, read His world, and just let Him work me over. Like with any intimate relationship, it doesn’t take a whole lot. The quiet, still interaction let’s Him know it’s all about Him. In that very moment, you let God know you are open and ready. I have had to moments while I am in the car just to go iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin for some good worship. I’m talking about tears streaming, hands up, heart pounding, some real encounters with God. In those very moments, I see myself making it. I see myself preserving through my challenges. I see myself as great as He said I would be.

Prayer and praise are life’s secret weapons. It doesn’t take long for God to show up either. Many times He’s leaning on your door post waiting to knock. All He is waiting for is your open heart. He wants to know if He can trust you with the next level. More importantly, He wants to know if you’re ready.

I have learned to trust God’s timing. I literally just bought my first watch in a few years. I have been so set on trusting God’s timing that I didn’t even want to wear a watch. Well, until I just found this fly watch with orange diamonds. Lol. But really, God’s timing always reigns supreme. Now I have been applying to jobs ALL year. It is unreal. I have been overqualified for most, but still believed God. When I let go of wishing, hoping, and fretting over job opportunities, they began to come in like a flood. Phone calls, emails, random messages, like something out of a movie. Every time it happens, I just to look up and shake my head. God is so faithful. He will always cover you. Whether you verbalize it or not, He is well aware of what you need.

One of the most unique things I have learned about life is that sometimes people have expiration dates and shelf lives too. This is one of the toughest things I have had to come to realize. This is one that we all have to come to realize one way or another. Many times we are fighting to hold on to something that is covered in baby oil, mineral oil, and every other type of oil. Lol. It constantly slips through your grip. These are things that are not meant for us to hold on to. This goes for jobs, people, situations, memories, emotions, etc. We have to understand that there is a time limit on everything. I know I am guilty of holding on to unnecessary things, whether it be love or an old pair of shoes. Lol. I have learned to let people run their courses in my life and move forward. The best thing you can do is let people serve their time and then free yourself of when they are gone.

Knowing that I must trust His timing and not my own,

~Mel

Ode to 2010: Post 6 of 12

2010-12-22T20:11:00.000-08:00

Lesson #5: Friends & Family

You don't choose your family. They are God's gift to you, as you are to them. ~Desmond Tutu

Sometimes our hearts get tangled. And our souls a little off-kilter. Friends and family can set us right. And help guide us back to the light.~Sera Christann

Let me just tell you there is nothing more important than the people God has connected you to. I can really say that after the year I’ve had, that if it had not been for my friends & family, I would be on serious meds and/or in an institute. The late night prayer meetings, skype chats, texts, FB messages, tweets, phone calls, they made all the difference in my surviving this tumultuous journey.

My (immediate) family is comprised of some of the most incredible women I know. My mom, my 2 sisters, and my god mom Ana. I think about the year we have had and I am simply amazed at how we managed to survive this year’s course of events. Aside from my dad passing, we have REALLY faced some challenges this year, things that I cannot even blog about. In areas of love, health, finances, battles of the mind, jobs, relationships, you name it. We have faced SO much this year and came out like pure gold.

I thank God for my mother, I really do. *cue the tears falling* I cannot think of a more incredible woman of God. A woman who single handedly planned her husband funeral from a laptop in the hospital waiting room while the breathing machine was being unplugged. A woman who made sure her husband was buried like a king amongst family, friends, and foes who gave little or no support. A woman who stood in all white to salute her husband being placed into a marble wall. A woman who has kept the faith in the midst of her greatest storms. A woman who has lived day to day believing God despite what it has looked like or how she felt. A woman who has shown herself strong in the midst of wanting to lay in bed all day to mourn the loss of her best friend. To the woman who has shown me that God is real. My mother. I cannot even fully describe in words what it has been to witness my mother persevere through these past 3 years. Before my dad passed it has been a journey. From leaving a six figure job, to moving to a foreign city, to fighting for what she knows is right, to transitioning to a life of retirement, to making major financial decisions on pure faith, to waking up every morning in pure expectation. Nothing has been more rewarding than seeing my mother laugh or smile. It has been a year of the unexpected, but my mother has done nothing but expect the absolute best from God. When I look at her, her journey, her story, her courage, I know God is real.

My sisters have really stood strong. My baby sis has shown me that my efforts have not been in vain. From winning queen of her school, to passing critical tests with flying colors, to making smart choices, to not succumbing to peer pressure, to facing tough challenges with a smile, to watching our daddy go in that marble wall, she’s become such a big girl this year and I am so very, very proud. My middle baby sis has shown that she is not interested in anything but greatness. From vindicating the Mitchell name, to carving her own path, to making sure she keeps our fabulous legacy alive on campus, to dreaming without measure, to understand her purpose, to not allowing the way people treat her dictate who she is to become, she has evolved and I am proud. Nothing has been more rewarding than watching my sisters blossom into incredible little women. I am so blessed to have built in BFFs and riding partners. It’s amazing how we’ve grown up to become such great friends and closer than ever.

Anyone who knows me knows that my family is my core. It is all that I have. I have gotten closer to one of my favorite cousins in the entire world. It’s sad that it takes someone dying for you to get close (or closer) to your family, but it is essential. What amazes me is how family traits and history always seem to flow throughout your family lineage. It is important to know your family’s plight so you don’t repeat the same unnecessary steps. I am grateful for the way things have transpired. When I look at the people I am NOT close within my family, I am not even hurt or disappointed. God just showed me that there will be less people with their hands out when I become a millionaire and very few can take credit.

Sigh….. my friends. What an incredible set of friends I have been given. Whether I have known a person a lifetime or a short time, I have grown to love and know some truly wonderful people. When I faced my greatest challenge this year, I made one phone call and my girl was at my house within moments to cook for my entire family, no questions asked. You would have thought we were having a birthday party. I hadn’t even realized that we were in the midst of planning a funeral because the house was filled with so much love. But that’s just it! With every loss of love or a loved one, God always finds a way to fill that void.

I have learned that it is essential to be transparent on your plight to greatness. It is ok to be a little vulnerable. It is ok to show who you are (just enough, not all of you). It is ok to let your mascara run a little. It is ok to cry and get it all out. It is ok to say you’re sad or having a bad day. It is ok to say you miss someone and genuinely mean it. It is ok to say you love someone and not necessarily be in deep, deep love. It is ok to be just who you are. You never know how a small statement of truth will alter someone’s course. I think it is essential to tell it all so you can move forward. I am at the point in my life where I really don’t care what people think or say. If someone one truly wants to be free, they choose to be. I choose to be me, no matter the cost. At the end of the day, someone wants that same freedom and may be looking to you for guidance.
My blog has been my medicine this year. Well, the cyber world in general. I have connected with some incredible people. From love, to friendship, to support, to just a few simple words, people have been amazing. Sometimes it’s ok to let new people in your life. Actually, it is very necessary. I think when you are raw and open about something you think you’re the one only struggling with, someone will come along your journey to let you know you are not alone. You become the beacon of light for someone else who is struggling with the same issue. You would be surprised at the people I have met, loved, and befriended this year. All in the midst of what I thought was the worst year of my life. These people made this year go smooth. Really. I know it is nobody but God to have me meet these people along my journey.

I have made friends overnight. It’s funny. I am not the multiple “BFF” type of person, but I have truly become more open to befriending people. Not to the point where we are all meeting up for coffee and joining the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, but enough to say, “hey, so and so is cool”. God has connected me to people through tears not necessarily years. It only takes a moment to connect to a great person. If not only for the moment, the purpose has been served.

Speaking of purpose, you cant over think a person’s purpose in your life, eventually they will show you. I truly mean this. I am currently in the process of trying to determine why God connected me to a certain individual. For as quickly as he fell for me, he has fallen completely off the radar. I have no idea why or how, but it has just fizzled. I ask myself, “God why send a new ‘him’ if he has no intentions of staying”. I have cried about it, tried to talk about, and done thinking about it. I cannot allow something to rent that kind of space in my head because the real estate is entirely too expensive. If he wants to stay, he knows how. The sad thing is, when he comes back to where he left me, I may be in a new location. It’s unfortunate, but it’s real.

If God grants you one opportunity, what makes you think He won’t do it again? If He is the provider, what is provided is trivial to Him. So, to think that love won’t find its way back to you is asinine. Nothing is without purpose and timing in your life. For every great thing you experience, another one is ready to find its way to you. Keep believing and know that the cycle must and will continue.

Loving who God has bonded me to and who He sends my way,

~Mel

Ode to 2010: Post 5 of 12

2010-12-22T20:03:00.000-08:00

Lesson #4: Forgiveness

"When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free." - Catherine Ponder

Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. It’s a gift that keeps on giving. Since dad passed, I have personally confronted people. I have become this pit bull in a skirt when it comes to him or anyone else in my family. Because his passing exposed so many counterfeit friends and family, I have not been timid when it comes to telling it like is. I let folks have it and keep it moving. While I have definitely toned it down a little since March, my intentions are the same, I have to let people know how I feel.

I don’t allow the way people have treated me or anyone in my family to dictate how I live my life. While folks have pissed me off in one way or another, I have had to move forward. I recently sat down with one of my line sisters who I have always been cool with but for one reason or another we grew apart because of some BS I heard. For a while, I just wouldn’t speak to her and she started to noticed. I said, “you know what, let me call________ to have lunch and let her know my issue”. We ate, we talked, we laughed, we cried. She was like, “Mel, I didn’t even know you were mad for real, I just thought you were going through something that day.” Honey, all that time I was going out of my way to have an attitude with someone who didn’t even know I had one. Now what if something happened to one of us and we left that issue unresolved? Most importantly, we simply missed out on time we could have been building upon our relationship and ultimately working in collaboration. It was such a waste of time to have an attitude about something that could have been easily resolved.

There are some other people I wouldn’t mind backing my car over, but I am really, really praying about them. When the opportunity presents itself, I will make sure I make the situations right. I promise I will. The crazy thing is they probably don’t even know for real. Unforgiveness is merely like drinking poison and thinking the other person will die. You have to know that not forgiving a person will merely hurt you, not them. Unforgiveness might be blocking your breakthrough. While I have let the offenses go, I need to remove the way I feel about the people. It’s unfortunate because they really might be great people, but I may never know it. It’s funny because people will have a preconceived notion about you and when they meet you they have to laugh because they were so off! The same goes for people who have hurt you. Many times their actions were out of immaturity or lack of knowledge. A mere conversation can clear up years of wasted time.

That’s my mission as I close this year out and usher in the next. I am not letting anyone get in the way of my next level. If it means forgiving people who have hurt me greatly, then so be it.

Forgiving so I can be free,

~Mel

Ode To 2010: Post 4 of 12

2010-12-22T19:50:00.000-08:00

Lesson #3: Favor

"For His anger is but for a moment, but His favor is for a lifetime or in His favor is life. Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning."

- Psalm 30:5

Let me just let you know that favor will give you what money can’t buy. I have held firm to this belief all my life, but I have TRULY seen God move in this area of my life. I have always been accustomed to living a certain way since I was small. My parents worked hard to give me the life that they were not privy to, so I have always enjoyed a comfortable life. While my parents instilled the belief that hard work should always be rewarded with nice things, they always stressed the fact that favor trumps it all.

This year I have literally been on 20 trips all over the United States. Miami, Vegas, Houston, Dallas, New Orleans, NY, Chicago, Mountains of Tennessee, Alabama, all over Florida, you name it. Now this is someone who didn’t have a traditional 9-5. I don’t even know how I did it. In the beginning of the year, I had a dream where I was in the airport with lots of luggage all around me. God told me “this is your year to travel”. Of course I was like, “God how? Where am I going to get the money?” God showed me better than He could whisper. He made a way out of no way. I received a companion pass to travel whenever I wanted, wherever I wanted, for a minimal cost. I found Swiss luggage marked down to $19.99 at Target. I was connected to clients in Texas that were willing to pay for my time and talents. Oh, and they flew me to whatever city they were in. I have done more this year than I could have ever imagined and it’s all because I have been favored.

I have learned to stop doing the math when it comes to God and money, He always makes the difference. I can vividly remember walking into H & M this summer and the clerk was marking the entire clearance area down to $5. It was something out of a dream. Follow me camera… (*Messy Mya voice*) Can you imagine walking in the store and seeing ALL your favorite pieces for 5 bucks??? I mean, I was in complete tears. I am serious. I know it was nobody but God. I spent like $50 and got pieces that totally transformed my wardrobe. This might seem materialistic, but when you pray, you need to pray specifically. More than anything, it was a desire of my heart. Whether it is as menial as a parking space to having a successful marriage, I don’t have any boundaries when it comes to prayer. I even started thrifting this year. I was always one of those really finicky people that was adamantly against going to Goodwill or Value Village. Now people are giving me gift certificates to both for Christmas. Lol. It is all about perspective and style. If you are constantly evolving both, it really doesn’t matter.

They say favor ain’t fair, and they are partially correct. Favor belongs to those who believe and those who sow . It may seem unfair that someone is experiencing success and moving quickly up their ladder of success, but we often don’t know their stories. It is really not our role to speculate. We must press towards our own destiny and not be concerned with how much they have and what we don’t. The bottom line is that we must understand this whole thing called favor. If we are diligent on our own journey, we won’t have time to sit around and question the plight of another's. Believe me, I have questioned God a time or two, but then I have to repent. There is someone sitting on the sidelines thinking the same about me. There is no way they can know how much I tithe, how much I pour into the youth, how many nights I cry myself to sleep in prayer, how much I have sacrificed, or even who I truly am. Truth to the matter is, no one ever stops to find out your story, they just see your glory. That’s cool, it’s by design. God has it where your glory will be so magnificent that people will seek you and want to hear your story. The favor on your life will be so great that your story will motivate others to believe in their own dreams and support you in yours. Favor is meant to over flow so you can be a blessing to all of those around you.

Understanding that favor makes up the difference,

~Mel

Ode to 2010: Post 3 of 12

2010-12-22T19:43:00.000-08:00

Lesson #2: Faith

"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see"- Hebrews 11:1

More than anything, I know that without God, I am nothing. This year has taught me that I have to be oblivious to what I (physically) see and focus on the things hoped for. Everything I’ve stood on faith to believe, I have received. The things that have been slow to come are obviously not finished being worked on. I’ve had to truly stand on His word with every step.

I think about why certain relationships have ended the way they did or why certain job opportunities have or haven’t presented themselves, and I merely have to stop dead in my thoughts. I have to go back to realize how God has rescued me before. There is nothing more I can do to change my future but to believe God for what I desire. More than anything, I have to realize that God will not give me more than I am capable of handling. It’s like a 3 year old asking for a new (real) car for Christmas. No parent would give a toddler a 10 ton machine right? So why would God give me things that I am not ready for?

I think about leaving a job that I thought was carved specifically for me. This was such a defining moment for me. I was a part of a dynamic management duo that was set to take the Atlanta schools by storm. Once we got wind of shady businesses practices, we began to ask questions. As you know, the moment you try to stand up for something right, you because the person that was wrong. In order to not further be a part of foolishness, I simply walked away without a fight. I didn’t put any energy into it. While I had some free time to dream, I spent some very valuable moments with my father, soaking up some valuable knowledge. Within a month, he was gone. I didn’t know why God wanted me to leave that job until I watch my dad leave the earth. I knew in that very moment that God wanted me to take time to do things that were most important, and that was to be with my dad. That one small step of faith turned out to be the best decision I ever made. Months later, my organization lost all government funding, folks went to jail, and the entire operation foiled. God wanted me out of the way.

Since the day I have left, I have had numerous opportunities to travel, work on high profile projects with celebrities, work on contracts that I would have never been able to work on, meet incredible new people, and live out my dreams. Now this my friend, is a life of faith. Not knowing if unemployment will be renewed. Not knowing if the money in my savings will be enough. Not knowing if a client’s check will clear. Not knowing if the next client will become available. Not knowing if I will get the interview. My life has truly been founded on “give us this daily our daily bread”. I have had to make myself understand that it only takes a one phone call, one moment, one person, one day, to change your entire life. (For the good). God can take everything you’ve been praying for and give it all to you in one singular moment. When I stand firm on this very belief, I am not pulled into a whirlwind of depression and fret. I just have to know that if it is to work out, then it will. If the answer doesn’t come in this very moment, then it will have to come in the next.

Finding comfort in living from faith to faith...no other choice,

~Mel

Ode to 2010: Post 2 of 12

2010-12-22T19:33:00.000-08:00

Lesson #1: Love

"Love....so many people use your name in vain...." -Musiq

Sigh….. love…. I guess I had to get this section out of the way early so I would just get it all out of my psyche. I remember watching Dave Chappelle numerous times and my favorite episode was when Rick James said, “Cocaine is a hell of a drug.” Well, I am here to add to that list, love is a hell of a drug. Lol.

While I am one of those quintessential dreamers when it comes to love and the pursuit of happiness, I always try to remain somewhat realistic. I have dream boards that date back to the 80’s. I have always had this image of a knight in shining armor to rescue me from my reality and woo me away to our own little world. Every man I meet I’m like, “Ok…is this it God? Show me a sign! What’s next?” (Always doing waaaaaaay too much… lol)

Love is a tricky thing. While someone is ready to love, they have to be ready to love you. I have learned that love is not a forced emotion; it is one that comes effortlessly. You can’t make someone love you if they don’t have the capacity to love you. While I know an individual has the capacity to love, they may not be capable of loving me in the capacity in which I need them to. This thought gives me the comfort that I need to move from situation to situation. I take each love, like, and lust as lessons, some more or less intense as the next. More importantly, I hold on to the lesson, but not the person. This is essential to protect my total being and who I’m destined to be. You can’t allow a situation to redefine all that God has created you to be. Sure, you are supposed to be a little different from each experience because you have garnered a new level of understanding and a new way of thinking, but never are you to change who God intended for you to be. After every tear dried, I realized that when I looked in the mirror, I saw the same aura of greatness. With tear filled eyes, I used to ask God why, how, when, where, what, and He merely said, “Soon”. With that, I love forward in pursuit of Him and I know somewhere along the way I will find what I’m looking for in life and I will be found for someone who has been searching for me all of his.

This year, I have met and dated some incredible men. While most of them were out of town, I have been so blessed to meet such incredible human beings. No matter how the situations ended up, I thank God for the glimpse of my final product. I didn’t think a man existed that could laugh at the same silly jokes, loved the same soul stirring music, loved his family to the end of the earth, knew what I was saying when all I was doing was crying, and could give strength merely through a touch. Yeah, this man is actually real. Why am I not with him right now you ask? Well, because out of all that greatness, I know that he is not who God wants me to be with forever. But I do know that he was everything I needed at that very moment in life. I get tears when I think about the genuine spirit of this man. He flew down to be with me in one of the hardest moments in my entire life. I will love him forever for that. He knows who he is.

When I let him go, I met an incredible man on my same journey to be all that God wants me to be. While it seemed to fit like a perfect puzzle, it still didn’t flow seamlessly. I am not ruling it out, but I am not willing to lose my mind about it. At the end of the day I am me and no one else can be. The same goes for every individual. While we are all great alone, we are magnificent when we are partnered with who God has destined for us. My perspective is that if God can send me one wonderful man after the next, surely the next can be just a magnificent. I have retired from mind reading and second guessing. When God shows or tells me something I move in that direction, and that direction only. This is sometimes hard to decipher from my female intuition and silly insecurities, but I have to constantly be in prayer.

I am very candid about my accounts because I want people to know that every situation and person is meant to push us closer to our final product. Sure I want to hold on to the “one” I thought was my ideal mate, but for whatever reason, it didn’t work. When things don’t work or find a way to fizzle out, I leave it alone. I cry about it, get mad about it, scream about it, but have to move on. If I have learned nothing more this year, I have learned not to stay in one place for too long. This is essential when loving. Love is such an encompassing emotion it can derail your course to excellence if you don’t move in wisdom. You have to be careful who you love and how you love. You can love with your total being and realized that you a) have nothing left for yourself and b) you are giving away more love than they are even willing to give back to you. Even through my disappointments in love, I have decided that I’m going to release it all into the atmosphere. If it’s meant, then it’s meant. I used to hate that saying because I felt like it was a lazy way to view what you know you want. God showed me that it is essential to let go of what you THINK you want so you can ultimately get what is promised. Don’t get me wrong, I dream and have preferences, but I am still open to what God has. I have to be open in order to make it to my final destination.

Still loving freely,

~Mel

Ode to 2010: Post 1 of 12

2010-12-22T19:30:00.000-08:00

Close out letter to 2010......

So, as I say goodbye to 2010, I sit in silence. Like I am waiting for my named to be called for an academy award, or like I am waiting to jump out of an airplane to sky dive, or like I am about to give my first trial sermon over in Africa before 1 million people. I am waiting to walk into the next level of my life with great expectancy . I expect my favor to be increased. I expect my love to over flow. I expect to be a blessing to others every day that I live. I expect to be a secret millionaire that funds people’s dreams. I expect to be debt free. I expect to show people that God is real and that my path was not in vain. I expect to shatter all preconceived notions. I expect to be greater than ever before. Above all, I expect to be in the will of God, doing exactly what He has destined for me to do. With all of these expectations, I am not above God changing the plan totally. I am willing to give up what I know to have what God says I am to have. I have just that much faith.

So, Ms. 2010 I say goodbye and goodnight. I thank you for your lessons, but I don’t ever want to meet anyone quite like yourself. While I have been strengthened through this journey, I don’t think I would choose to do a repeat performance. I am grateful for the lessons, but I am even more grateful that this year is gracefully bowing out.

The time is now to usher in a new season of jubilee. The time is now to prepare for all the promises that were written. The time is now to live out the dreams that keep me up at night. The time is now to do something different. The time is now to live. That’s exactly what I plan to do.

~Mel

Faith is refusing to stop looking beyond....

2010-11-30T19:02:00.000-08:00

I refuse to stop believing. I refuse to stop dreaming. I refuse to stop looking beyond what I currently see. I refuse.

Over the past year I have seen God work miracles that I literally never thought possible. I've replayed the chain of events over and over in my mind and I realized that God had me in his hands all along. No matter what I wanted or thought, He was in total control. The more I doubted, the longer it took for manifestation. Miracles are triggered by belief. Mere faith. That's all.

One of the most intriguing passages in the bible is "without faith it is impossible to please God". (Hebrews 11:6) Sounds simple enough right? All you have to do is have faith and keep it moving right? Right... easier said than done. Faith is easy to exert when everything is fluid and moving smoothly. Faith is that back up against the wall type stuff. Faith is the nothing left in your account and you still manage to write a faith check when the pastor calls for it at the alter. Faith is believing that God will provide healing when 3 doctors tell you that you won’t make it. Faith is looking in the face of death and saying you know your God will take care of you. Faith is knowing your unemployment benefits will expire soon, but sow a seed into the life of someone else. Faith is waking up every morning believing God will provide fresh manna from Heaven like before. Faith is moving to a new city with no sight of a job and knowing that God will open up a door. Faith is saying that you will be debt free by the end of the year and not believing anything different. Faith is that radical level of thinking. All of that makes God's heart full. He becomes so overwhelmed with emotion at your exertion of faith that He finds extra ways to bless you. It's called overflow. When you please God, you receive things that you don’t even ask Him for.

The wonderful thing about faith is that is starts within. You don’t have to order anything special online, or talk to one of the world's top experts, or even have a conference with others. You can begin operating in faith with a mere thought. It can all be done within a blink of an eye. Last week I was lying in bed and couldn't sleep. I flipped the TV on to Mike Murdock and he was talking about sowing a faith seed. He spoke about when he first began in ministry and God blessed him with his first $50. As soon as he got that money, God told him to sow it into a family in the service. He said he fought tooth and nail, but he eventually sowed that seed. On the way out of the service. A man walked up to him and shoved $50 dollars in his hand. God told him to sow the money he JUST got and he did. The next day, someone came up to him and sowed $100 to him and another couple sowed a whole new wardrobe to him. So you know what I did right? I immediately got my check book. I said, "Ok God, let me see what you're talking about. I need a sign". I wrote a check to my mom for $50 and wrote her a note to say that I was going to one day turn that $50 into $500,000. She was in tears and said she blessed the seed. So I leave to go run errands the next day and I see a small envelope addressed to me in the mail from DC. I looked at it like, "who in the world is writing to me?" I opened it up and it was letter from one of sorority sisters/spiritual partners telling me what a blessing I have been to her life and enclosed was, I will let you guess, yes, a $50 check. Within 24 hours, God had already replaced what I thought I was sacrificing. When she gave me that seed, I immediately resowed that seed into my mother. Instead of paying to get my hair done, I went and had hers done. So the next day I went to my favorite consignment shop to look for winter coats and cute pieces and I was able to get everything I wanted for $20. If I showed you what I bought, you would think I was a professional liar. lol. No one can beat God in a math game. He's a master of it all.

You see, it was never about the $50 for God, it was all about the faith. It was the faith that God would replace all that I have sown above and beyond what I could ever ask or think. No matter what the numbers look like, God's math always reigns supreme. Regardless of what I may have wanted to happen, God has always been in total control. I have seen God take the little that was in my hand and make it much more in His. It didn’t happen until I let go though. All the things I have ever wanted have come from believing. Whether it has been something material like a coat, a car, or a pair of shoes, or something more substantial like a scholarship, a spiritual breakthrough, or healing in my body. God has shown me that when I totally surrender, He can truly go to work on my behalf. I think about when I was little and I wanted my dad to fix something. I never doubted that he couldn't do it. I would be like, "Here daddy, you fix it," and he would say "ok baby girl, daddy's got it". No doubt, I knew it would be done. Not one worry.

The same thing with God. We can’t say God fix this marriage, this relationship, this job situation, this pain, and then keep looking over His shoulder to make sure He is working on it to our liking. That's not how He operates. He wants to know that we trust Him totally. No sense in giving it to God if we still have our hands on it. That's not how the mechanic works is it? Does the watch repair man ask you to come behind the glass counter to work on your watch with him? Does the doctor allow you to be awake during major surgery? No. Surgery is his area of expertise and you trust him to work it out right? Right. The same with God. God's most earnest desire is to do a complete work in us. From start to finish, He wants us to be all that we can be. He already believes in us, it is up to us to believe in Him. Once we line up with what He believes, even the sky won’t be the limit.

After the year I've had, nothing really shakes me like it used to. I know that God has a total plan for my life. A plan that I have nothing to do with. After witnessing my father take his last breath, I know that God has a total different plan that I have ever imagined. On March 12th, 2010, I totally took off my rose colored glasses and looked at life for what it was. No longer was I consumed with the shoulda, coulda, and wouldas. I knew in that very moment that the purpose was in me couldn't end up in a white bag, being shipped off to a morgue. I knew that if I didn’t trust God totally, I could end up living life in circles. I refuse to be that person. If no one else had faith, my daddy did. That's how I know God is a God that operates on His own plan. Some things can’t be explained or put into words. But in the very moment my father died, something in me began to live. My faith took a life of its own. I began to see God in a totally different light. I saw God as this massive figure with a plan of His own. Every dream board, dream book, and dream book mark I had made for 2010 didn’t have my dad missing from it. In that very moment, God showed me that just because things happened that weren't in my plan doesn’t mean they weren't a part of the overall plan. From that day on, faith was all I had because faith was all I knew. Many people thought my faith would waiver, but instead it started to get stronger as the days went on.

The Word says faith without works is dead right? (James 2:20) So everything we do should show our faith in action. So if I believe God for a trip, I should always have my luggage ready. If I believe God for a job, I should already have my work clothes separated in my closet. If I believe God for a husband, I shouldn't be giving my body away to every man I meet, right? Right. I should still be moving according to what I believe God wants for my life. If something is not in His plan, then it won’t come together. If it is, then it will be. Can't fret over things I can't change, that's the bottom line.

Faith is one of the most powerful, underrated tools we possess as believers. We must hold on to what God promised and never stop believing. If you do nothing else... keep holding on...!

Moving in faith and looking beyond my right now...

~Mel

Silence is not good bye forever....

2010-11-30T18:16:00.000-08:00

Lately I have been quiet y'all and I'm sorry. It has just been one of those months, well...years. Now, I have had my share of ups and downs in relationships, but God has shown me once again that I can never get too comfortable. In everything, always expect the unexpected and stay prepared. God is always allowing curve balls. Good thing I am well equipped for the ride.

Recently, someone close to me decided that he needed a moment of silence to hear from God for a while. *sigh* This has been tough for me. Very. But how can I argue with that? He became my refuge from all the craziness in my world. In my quest to make us work, I never considered that it might be a little overwhelming because he is on his own journey. Is it just me or is this "silence" thing enough to derail your whole train of thought? lol. A much as I love to talk, not talking (as much) has been tough. Silence is merely an interruption of regularly scheduled communication. Not good bye forever..... I guess...

Throughout my relationships and life, I have developed the mindset that, 'what is meant will happen and everything that doesn't come together, just wasn't meant'. You simply can not make love happen where it wasn't meant. It's like planting a tree in soil that's not equipped for its growth.

Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires-Song of Solomon 2:7

Man, Love is a funny thing. Easy to say, harder to show. The moment it leaves your lips, you're immediately held doubly accountable for your actions. Have you ever said, "well if you love me then...." Yeah, I have to. Really, if its truly love, there's no need for 'if ,then' statements. Actions should speak loud enough for you. If you love someone, you have to love them enough to help them grow, even if that means getting out of the way.

I have gone through points in my relationships where I had nothing to say. Not that I wasn't happy, but I felt like we were taking a trip with no destination. If we were going to pursue it any further, it had to be marriage or just 'homies'. Nothing in between. And then... there is that gray area where you just don't know what's next.... that's where God is REALLY in control.

I think a lot of my girlfriends and I are experiencing the same things right now. Men that seem ideal for our 'forevers', but there seems to be one thing. We often find ourselves questioning whether 'this is it' or if God wants us to go the other way. I've talked to a few friends in general terms and they say the same things. Out of no where, their loved one took a sabbatical from there routine. That particular lapse in normalcy really derailed their emotions and they felt lost, without explanation, not sure about what to do next. I have learned that with love, it doesn't have to be complicated. Either you're in it for the long haul, or it will end as quickly as it started.

It's ok to be invisible to others as long as the one you love sees you. (GOD)

I recently found myself in a situation where the person I cared for deeply started to pull away. I found every reason why it was my fault. I really couldn't figure out what I did. I cried so many times to Eric Benet's "Sometimes I cry" that I cant even play it without my mascara ending up in my lap. I pleaded with God to reveal what was going on. The only reply God sent was to "let it go".... You know those were fighting words for me... lol.. As hard as I fought to make this "right", God told me to let it go. I just couldn't come to grips to what God was saying. But as time progressed, God showed me it takes greater power to let something go than it does to hold on to it. It has nothing to do with settling, it has everything to do with having faith. If something belongs to you, it belongs to you.

The moment I didn't have any answers, I began to search for them... in the Word. -HOLD ON A MINUTE- You see, it was all by design. God wanted me to take a break from wanting that to work to refocus on what He wanted for me. Now, I am not ruling out this man as my mate, but that's irrelevant in the grander scheme of things. God's plan for me reigns supreme. Whether he or whoever is standing next to me. My purpose in life still remains. God wants me to see if I can trust him to send me another just as great or to make him greater for me. True indeed, I feel like we were carved for one another, but I cant waste these moments in trying to figure that out. If he's mine, he will return. No other woman will quite fit the bill if I'm made just for him.

About a month ago I went to my college homecoming. Let me just say that while I consider myself saved and filled with the holy ghost, it is something about being back on that campus that wakes up every carnal fiber I have left... (which I could of sworn was all gone). Well anyway, my infamous ex was there, along with a slew of other past loves and potential "buddies". It took EVERYTHING in me to remain saved. Now before I left home for homecoming, I prayed for strength to make my current relationship work. While it is long distance, I have never thought of being with anyone else. I am(was) determined to make it work no matter what. I am not, nor have I ever been, a cheater, so I wasn't going to make this weekend an exception. Of course, I was rocking my cheetah print and was feeling "some type of way". I guess that animal print gave off the "hot and ready" signal or maybe it was my soup coolers piled with ruby red lipstick. Who knows? But anyway... my ex.. hmmmmm... let's just say he wasn't acting like he was with anyone. I laughed it up for a minute, but I knew nothing would come of it. I mean, he chose her and not me, what would I look like? As the weekend progressed, every time one of my potential flings tried to hit me up, my phone shut off or the battery died instantly. It was the craziest thing ever. I was like, "what is going on"... I could do nothing but laugh because I knew it was nothing but God. I had no intentions of slipping away with anyone, but the fact that the opportunity never transpired was even more of a miracle. Of course, I checked in every few hours with the boo to let him know I was being a good girl.. he was proud, so was I. I came back from homecoming just as "good" as when I left. And then....the plot thickens....

I get back from homecoming thinking everything was perfect when I was hit with a 180 degree turn around . Here I was thinking there was going to be some golden surprise for being a good girl during a hedonism weekend filled with wanton desires. I wasn't. Out of nowhere, it felt like everything we were working towards was in vain. It all changed. He got really quiet with no explanation and I had no earthly explanation for it . Of course, I was left thinking a million different things. I ran back to my first love ... the Word. I knew I wouldn't go wrong falling back in love with tried and true promises. The moment he stopped talking, God's voice began to resonate louder than ever before. I began to have these wild and vivid dreams. I began to foresee things that were to come. I began to speak things into existence more than ever before. I realized that his moment of silence might have been ordained by God. It was like I was cheating on God and He was no longer having it. If it meant taking my honey away for a brief period, then so be it . I was left to wonder why God wouldn't just let me have both. When will the balance between the 2 be enough? That's an answer that I am still on the quest to find.

So now what am I doing in the meantime? Becoming a better version of who I already am. I think this year has been so tumultuous emotionally that I need a break to decide what's important. After being the backbone for everyone, encouraging people even in the midst of my own storm, waking up every morning to give someone a fresh word, I need a few moments of silence. I've always been the type of person who used love as an escape from reality. A place where I could hide. But when the covers are drawn on that whimsical hiding place, I am once again faced with the reality that if I don't deal with the things I've run from, I will eventually end up running in circles. Right back where I started.

During these past few weeks of depth self discovery, I have realized that God isn't finished with me yet, if fact, He's just getting started. Every miracle that has been performed this year has shown me that God merely wants me to seek Him daily. As a result of my life's twists and turns, I have had no other choice. One of the best things that has happened to me was an ignored phone call/email/message. God was telling me that the only person that had the answers I was seeking was HIM. I could scour the earth and come up empty every time until I realized that God is the way, the truth, and the light.

As a lover of love and all things related, I think it's worth the wait. No matter the battle struggle, or war. Love is worth it. God has a love for each and everyone of us that trumps any love we can find on earth. He gives us an extra treat by allowing us to find our soul mates. In the event that you haven't been as so fortunate, don't lose hope, it does exist. The moment you stop believing, is the moment that you stop attracting it. It's out there. Listen, if I can hold my head up and keep believing, surely you can. I know that my purpose is in line with my significant other, so I can't play any games when it comes to who I bond with. If I have waited this long for the "right" person, it's no use in half stepping, and you shouldn't either.

Don't take offense to silence, it might be the best thing to have ever happened to your love. Only time will tell.....

~Mel

In Case You've Missed Me....

2010-11-30T18:05:00.000-08:00

Hello All!

I have been in one of those moods lately where I have had the need to hear from God directly. A mental break if you will..... In the meantime, I wasn't really writing to the magnitude that everyone was accustomed to. Nevertheless, God would give me small revelations along the way and I would post them on my twitter and facebook accounts. I clearly left my blogger family out, so I compiled them all here for you all. I have 2 blog posts that I wrote up today as well. I promise not to disappoint, I have missed you all....

Be blessed...

~Mel

Life is too short to keep tab on all of those who have hurt you. All that baggage will keep you from your destiny. Bitterness is born from repeated unmet expectations. No one owes you anything, God has everything. You can't look for something in someone that only God possesses. LET IT ALL GO!... He will restore you double for your trouble ~ Melissa A. Mitchell © 2010

Just because you don't see it, doesn't mean He won't do it. Don't allow your past sufferings to serve as the barometer for your future. Your glory is greater than your story. We must hope for our breakthrough(s) patiently and that is when He will strengthen your heart. God keeps all of His promises, but we must be willing to wait. ~ Melissa A. Mitchell © 2010

No need to cry, beg, shout, or pout, if it were a dire need, then God would have supplied it. As we mature we realize that God answers our hearts' desires within His timing and His will. If He hasn't granted it (yet), then you simply don't need it. Don't be consumed by unmet met desires, instead focus on seeking the kingdom. The closer you get to Him, the more clearer things will become. ~ Melissa A. Mitchell © 2010

Many times when you're on the edge of a breakthrough, it may seem like the world is closing in around you. Don't be fooled by the ploys of the enemy. You are almost there. Though you may cry, don't let your dreams die. God will be your strength and your redeemer. If you just hold on, God will reveal His total plan and you will be the victor. Tomorrow might be the day, press to it. ~ Melissa A. Mitchell © 2010

One of the best things you can do in life is to 'keep it moving'. If you stay in the same place too long, you lose momentum and you waste time. Most importantly, the enemy knows exactly where to find you because he succeed in pushing you there. Don't give him the victory or the satisfaction... Keep it moving people! ~ Melissa A. Mitchell © 2010

God covers you in his blood while you're a work in progress. No need to be ashamed. God will do a complete and total work in you. Rest assured that your tomorrows shall be greater, just get through today. ~ Melissa A. Mitchell © 2010

We often find ourselves discouraged when it seems that all of our efforts have seemingly gone unnoticed, but know that God is all seeing and all knowing. He does not intend to cause us pain, but wants us to be in constant pursuit of Him. Sometimes He has to take dramatic measures to get us to that place of continual pursuit of him. Don’t take it personal, get personal with him. ~ Melissa A. Mitchell © 2010

What you permit is what will always continue. You have to demand to be treated what you're worth. God doesn't want it any other way. Its clear when you're not appreciated and its you're role to make a change. Do it today, it will be worth it in the long run. ~ Melissa A. Mitchell © 2010

No matter where you've gone, what you've said, or what has happened in your life, God's plan for you never changes. The plot of your story remains the same, you are merely adding depth to your chapters. Don't ever think you're too far from your purpose to get it right. Its still apart of your story. Trust God to know that it can and will get better ~ Melissa A. Mitchell © 2010

When God calls you to do something, let Him figure out the details. He only requires you to have a willing and pure heart. Once you walk in obedience, things will naturally fall into place. ~ Melissa A. Mitchell © 2010

If you made it to today, then you have another chance to get it right. Stop focusing on your failures and start focusing on our future. You can't change the past, but u can certainly have a hand in the future. Today is the perfect day to start fresh in the right direction. Never too late. ~ Melissa A. Mitchell © 2010

Just because its comfortable, it doesn't mean its right. Or for right now. God doesn't want you to stay in the same place for too long. He wants you to constantly evolve. This may mean walking away from what/who you love only to return as a better, new & improved version. Well, get to packing...might be moving time. (Again)..... ~ Melissa A. Mitchell © 2010

Visionaries focus on their goals and are willing to do something they hate, to pave the way to do what they love. Don't despise your meantime, it 'means' something. The next level will be upon you sooner than later. Keep pressing. ~ Melissa A. Mitchell © 2010

It takes great faith to treat a frustrating relationship the same as you would a calm, fulfilling one. If its meant to be and rooted in God's will, this will merely be a teaching moment. Allow God to work it out and stay out of it. Watch a breakthrough come forward. ~ Melissa A. Mitchell © 2010

Don't settle for the pain and not wait for the breakthrough. The enemy wants you to forfeit what's rightfully owed to you. Keep pressing. Not much longer. Can't be! ~ Melissa A. Mitchell © 2010

When you choose to focus on your life's obstacles, your choose to ignore your life's significance. ~ Melissa A. Mitchell © 2010

Don't be so busy working for the life you want that you forget to live the life you have. ~ Melissa A. Mitchell © 2010

Stop asking God for signs when He's already provided billboards. His message is clear. ~ Melissa A. Mitchell © 2010

Slow to choose, then you lose. Demand your value and your worth. You owe yourself that much.... ~ Melissa A. Mitchell © 2010

Looking at Life From Different Lenses

2010-10-21T17:47:00.000-07:00

When you change the way you look at things, you transform what you see.

As you all have journeyed with me this year, you have certainly experienced my life's up and downs right alongside me. What I've realized, every moment I've experience had an adverse effect on me when I chose for it to. And each moment got better because I chose to get up from being pushed down. Every life's trials and triumphs I went through, I had to change the way I viewed things. The moment I did, things began to change right before my eyes.

When I decided to leave my other job, I really had no real plan in mind. I just knew it was no longer where I needed to be. I knew I would miss my students and my freedom, but I just couldn't sit idle and let the foolishness happen around me. I finally got the guts to let it go and then I was left with all this time on my hands. Initially I was like, 'omg, I am such a waste right now, I need to be at somebody's job. I am not doing anything with my life!'. I used to sulk and complain about having so much time on my hands instead of looking at my free time as moments to dream. When I started to realize that God wanted to isolate me to dream, I began to cherish my quiet moments. This was during the time where my dad was still alive, so I was able to be with him for hours on end to laugh, talk, and run errands. The time that I thought was just idle, ended up being the last few moments I would be able to share with him. Those alledged idle moments ended up being moments I would never see again. Moments in my life that would last forever.

I was able to collaborate with friends of mine to open a foundation, I traveled more than I ever have. I was able to devote more time to family, to God. I was even able become a little more creative. God allowed me to view my idle moments as moments of clarity and freedom. The very moments I thought were holding me back, were moments that I was able to fly. I just had to change my view of them. Those same moments ended up being the stepping stones for my next level. The one I am entering now.

The moment I changed the way I looked at things, the moment the things began to change.

I think about my current job opportunities and partnerships that I've formed and I simply sit in amazement. God knew that I needed some time to regroup and re-dream because life would be moving at the speed of light. God knew that if I didn't take a moment to get closer to Him and truly define who I was, I would eventually crash. And Lord knows, I needed a break. He knew that if He didn't make it happen, there was no way that it would of happened.

I think about the past few men that have truly held my heart captive. EVERY single one of them have been in a different state. And I'm not talking about 50-100 miles away, I'm talking at least 500 miles away. I'm like, 'God, for real?' Whhhhhhhhhhy does every boo end up being millions of miles away? The answer is always simple 'To focus'. I'm like, whaaaaaaaaat? Am I not focused enough already Lord? Lol. I literally can hear God laughing. He knows that if the opportunity presented itself often enough, this whole abstinence thing would be an even tougher torch to carry so he HAS to keep the boo at a distance for a while.

I've always prayed for a quick work when it came to love and eventually marriage, so the time it will take for us to fall in love and make a solid effort will NOT take very long. ( It better not, I'm about to COMBUST!! lol) God is going to make it fall into place like a perfectly shaped set of puzzle pieces. I'm not even concerned. In the meantime, God is showing me who I am to be and who I don't need to be. I am learning more about my potential mate, his true motives, and what kind of heart he has. The whole 'absence makes the heart grow fonder' belief has a lot of validity to it. Every time we see each other, we value the moments more. Every phone call means a lot. Every mode of communication is utilized. It has forced both of us to decide if this is something we both truly want. Instead of viewing a long distance relationship as a chore, God has allowed me to view it as a blessing on hold. Kind of like a gift under the Christmas tree. I know what I want, I've asked for it, I'm almost sure I got it, and I'm literally looking at it under the tree, but its for an appointed time. In due season, the unveiling shall take place. If its what God has promised, every moment I wait, it is only going to get greater.

I've had to change my perspective on so many things. Especially with losing my dad. I've tried to find the silver lining so many times that my head spins. The one thing that I can truly say, is that I know he was able to claim his kingly rewards in heaven. No longer does he have to put up with the lies and wicked ways of this world. He can truly be at a place where peace resonates and joy is the way of life. Everything he deserved, he finally received. I can still feel his presence here on earth. He finds me in my dreams to tell me stuff and I even sense him when I go through my day. I know he left a lot of his spirit in me to continue his work on earth. Sometimes the mantle gets heavy, but someone has to do it right? I don't look at his death as a tragedy, just the timing, but who am I to question it.

There is never a perfect time to say goodbye forever, so that's why God controls that.

I've really come to grips with that. I've had to look at it differently to keep my sanity.

I think the most important thing I've learned along this journey is to never underestimate the power of God's favor. While you may think you're sitting idle, God is busying himself to create you something worth your while. I can't be consumed by things I don't know or can't control because I waste valuable moments that I could be living. When its all said and done, I want it to be known that I was obedient and I was faith filled. All the moments that seemed to be out of my control, are those where God was most in control.

I'm just going to keep holding on to what he promised and let the rest fall in place. I just have to look at things differently so they will look differently. The rest has no choice but to get it together. Lol.

Look at it differently and see it differently,

~Mel

Motivation Is Found In Frustration

2010-10-19T07:52:00.000-07:00

What's my motivation? What makes me go the extra mile? What keeps me going? I ask myself this time and time again.

It is not until something throws me off that I truly become more motivated. Weird huh? Often times I find myself frustrated by one thing or another. Whether I can't figure what direction my relationship is going. Or whether the job I really, really want will call me back. Or what I've been praying for will come to pass. I just get so worked up over the smallest things. I simply reach a point of frustration that is even embarrassing to admit. The funny thing is, in my times of the frustration is when I become the most motivated! I soon realized that my motivation is found in my frustration.

I look back over the moments where my love life was the PITS! I was dating guy after guy, picking them apart. Getting into relationships where I wasn't appreciated. Settling for men that were far beneath what I knew God promised. I just got to a point where I was simply too frustrated for words. For whatever reason, none of those relationships panned out to be anything legitimate, so I went back to focusing on self. I worked out more, I put more effort into being fly, I went over board making sure I always looked my best, I stepped it up all around. My frustrations in the 'love' department made me want to become a better version of myself. I was motivated to push to the next level.

It's funny that the thing that frustrates you, motivates you. I recently went to see Social Networking, the story of Facebook. I was SO inspired after leaving that movie. Not necessarily to go start a new version of Facebook, but to use my frustration to motivate me. Mark's (the founder) whole impetus for starting Facebook was to prove to his ex-girlfriend that he more than a genius a-hole and to get the attention of the prestigious clubs at Harvard. He wanted to prove to so many what couldn't be done. He broke all types of barriers and ideals. He was never really about the money, he was about proving people wrong. His whole premise for starting a $25 Billion company was because he was frustrated. Don't you wish your frustrations would warrant you that type of money? Well it just might.

Many times I find myself upset or in tears over things I can't control or simply perplexed over. Every time I am brought to tears, I use them to write. When I can't find the words to say, I find a melody to sing. When I don't know where to run, I open my bible. Each time the devil tries to throw a road block my way, I do my best to use those road blocks as mere stepping stones. My frustrations become my motivation.

I've been on this "daily bread" kick a lot lately because each day has literally been a new journey. I could start the day off being happy as pie and end it on my knees in tears before God. Or I could start the day in fervent prayer and end it in jubilee. You just never can tell. I think what God has taught me above all with my day to day journey is to make conscious decisions. I have had to make the decision to be happy or sad, regardless of what is thrown my way. When I am faced with bad news, I have the choice to process it however I want. I make the choice to fall down on my knees in prayer, or to wallow in tears. The next day could very well hold the explanation for yesterday's woes, but I can't stay in those moments. Those very frustrations can be the gateway to my breakthrough.

I think the most profound lesson I have learned over this past year is that I hold the key to my happiness. I decide whether I rise or fall. I am the keeper of my own destiny. I have to trust God whether I'm up or down. I can never lose sight of what He has promised. I have to trust and know that He is not a man that should lie. (And boy do men LIE! lol). I have to make the decision to see my frustration as motivation and keep it moving.

At this point, I have no other choice. God gave me another day to figure this thing called life out, and that is what I plan to do.

Allowing my frustrations to motivate me!

~Mel

The moment I let go....

2010-10-18T10:43:00.000-07:00

Monday already? Seems like it was JUST Monday... lol.. Last week went by so fast that I don't even remember it all. God moved last week on my behalf like never before. I was just about ready to throw in the towel for the 1 millionth time, but I had to keep remembering God provides us each with "our daily bread", so I had to keep pressing my way. I started this post off with a different topic in mind, but God seemed to have steered me in another direction. I want to talk a little bit about "letting go".

Well, I was a little quiet last week because God was operating swiftly on my behalf. Let me rewind to last Tuesday. As many of you all know, I am the master networker and I never meet a stranger. I am always invited out to events and private parties, but I rarely go. But this night, something in me told me I needed to pull it together and get out of the house. The first event I went to ended up starting about an hour late. I initially wanted to have an attitude, but God wouldn't let me. I ended up sitting with two wonderful people. I started talking to this lady about my life and she began to open up about hers. She revealed that she had a life full of abuse, hurt, confusion, and despair. She said she saw the movie "Precious" and said that it was a fairy tale in comparison to what she experienced growing up. She had been through numerous relationships, heart aches, and disappointments. It wasn't until 10-10-10 that she finally decided to let it all go. She said she woke up one morning, went to a church and decided to totally rededicate her life. She said she was baptized and cleansed herself of all the things she battled with for almost 50 years. She said, "I just decided to let it all go".

Wow. No matter how many times I hear the phrase, "let it go", it never ceases to amaze me how much power it truly possesses. This lady had endured a lifetime of pain and abuse but found the strength somewhere in her to simply let God have it. She said she's always had a relationship with God but she was seeking something different. All that she had experienced up until that very moment was holding her back from that next level. She said that meeting me that day further confirmed that she was on the right path. She is now going before several agencies to shop her life story and other original writings to be turned into movies. Because she found the strength to let go, God has unleashed the next level on her that she has never seen. And her journey has yet begun.

Funny thing is, the event that I was originally scheduled to attend that evening ended up being pushed back to a later time and I left before it even got started. I know that I was supposed to have that conversation with her. I was supposed to be a part of her journey and she was supposed to be a part of mine. It was in that very moment that I further understood the ideal of ordered footsteps. When you truly trust God every step of the way, you trust Him enough to know that even the moments that seem "off course", are still ordained.

The whole drive home, my mind was racing. What's holding me back? What's keeping me from that next level behind the veil? What must I do? I just have to let go. Even more than I already have. I have to be willing to give it all to Him. I have to trust that the outcome will be in my favor. Even when it looks like isn't.

I left that one event to meet my friends at this second event. I went to the venue and I was kinda unimpressed. I love the "black Hollywood" concept, but some events just don't do it for me. I ended up running into one of my sorors/friends. When I tell you I KNOW God had me to speak with her. I parked rather far from the venue so she drove me back to my truck and we ended up sitting in the car for an hour talking about letting go of past pain, embracing change, understanding your purpose, and truly learning how people operate. We discussed a few misunderstandings from earlier this year. I was pissed about somethings that were trivial, but I had just never verbalized any of it. I just kind of withdrew. We then talked about how the loss of our loved ones changed our lives forever and how God kept us sane, and how much we were alike. It was one of the best conversations I've had in a very long time. She then realized that she needed my help with a lot non-profit projects and of course I gladly accepted. All because I chose to let go of what the past had held.

And that's not all. Yes, there is more. Last week I saw God move like never before. Right now I am literally living day to day trusting God for the right career move and the right position. Well, let me tell you how God works in the most mysterious ways. About 3 weeks ago, a good friend (and former co-worker) called me about applying for this position. I was like, "Girl, that doesn't pay what I want, I need something different". I honestly hadn't even remembered sending my resume package to the organization, but apparently I did because I was one of the first people they called for an interview last week . But wait, not for just one, but two positions. In addition to that position, another girl friend of mine linked me up with another opportunity to make some additional income. This was literally ALL IN ONE DAY. I kid you not. All on last Tuesday. I was so blown away that I could do nothing but lift my hands.

I could hear God say, "All you had to do was let go. Let go what you thought was supposed to be of your life and let me do it. " I am literally sitting here in tears. I have been crying before the Lord all year about what I wanted to do, where I wanted to go, what I thought I should be, and He has simply reminded me that He is in control. Not one bill unpaid. Not one meal missed. Not one trip missed. Still fly. Still managing to smile. Still able to be a blessing to so many others. Even in the midst of my valley experience, God has used me. So this whole time I've been holding on to His hand, He has been working on something on my behalf.

The art of letting go is not the easiest to do, but the most rewarding. It's a 2-part process. You have to let go of the things that hurt you and/or made you upset. Forgive and move forward. You also have to let go of what you think the "perfect" plan is. Life is subject to change and we have to be able to flow with it. I think the most important thing to understand is that your life is your life and your journey is unique to your purpose. You have to trust and know that it will all come together. When you look back on it all, it will make better sense. Just keep living day to day and watch God work it out.

Letting go to see what God has in store....

~Mel

Fear-> A Figment of Your Imagination

2010-10-07T19:43:00.000-07:00

Fear---->Figment of your imagination

Many times we put so much time and effort into worrying about the unknown that we forget to live for the right now. I know I have been guilty of this, especially this year. I can be in the middle of a great trip or vacay and I find myself wondering, "Lord, when will I be able to do this again." Then I immediately pump the breaks. -PAUSE- The nerve of me to trust God only in increments. If I am to trust and believe Him, I must do it always, not just when it's easy or convenient. I am directly slapping God in the face by thinking He wont take care of me in the future like He has done in the past. That's when I realized that fear is often a figment of my imagination.

One of the first scriptures that we master as children is the Lord's prayer. Read it with me:

Thy kingdom come.

Thy will be done,

On earth as it is in heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread.

And forgive us our trespasses,

As we forgive those who trespass against us.

And lead us not into temptation,

But deliver us from evil.
For thine is the kingdom, and the power,

and the glory, for ever and ever.

Amen.

Now, I've highlighted one line in particular, "Give us this day our daily bread." I will wait while you re-read that one with me. Our DAILY bread. Did you understand that like I did? God is saying that each day we would get a new allotment. Our DAILY bread. "Daily" means it would be replenished on a regular basis. So day to day He would renew His mercy, grace, favor, understanding, love, etc. You name it. All that He promised us would cover us day to day. Isn't that incredible to know? Your 'daily bread' has been allotted for your daily triumphs and struggles. You have JUST enough to get through today, why try to solve problems for next week when God has only allotted you enough for this 24 hours?

Funny thing is, the thing you fear the most is probably what you need to worry the least. Like if your man will propose or if you will get that job. Or if you're friend is really mad at you or if you will be able to catch that sale. Trust me, if that man knows what best, he will lock you down forever. If that job is for you, no one else will fit it. You're friend is probably so consumed with their own lives that they forgot that you pissed them off earlier that week. And that sale will be there. You just can't worry about the unknown, you will lose strength for what you do know and what you do have.

One of my favorite scriptures talks about not using today's energy for tomorrow's worries. Matthew 6:34 says, "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Honey, isn't that a relief? (lol) You can trust and know that God has it under control. Each day God's mercies are renewed. It's like being able to drive a certain amount of miles to and from work in your car. Nothing more. Instead, you decide you want to take a road trip on that same tank of gas. That's not what that tank of gas was equipped for, but you chance it anyway. And you know what will eventually happen? You will run out of gas and you simply won't have enough. God gives you just enough for day to day. So the unknown that exists can't be stressed over because God already has a remedy for it, you have to trust him to get to that moment.

Often times we stress over the most menial things that we forget all that we currently have been given. It almost comes off as ungrateful. Yes you want a promotion. Yes you want your own house. Yes you want a new car. Yes you want to travel. Truth to the matter is that you have what you have and you must master that. God wants to see what you will do with what your given. This is not to say you shouldn't desire more, but that desire shouldn't overshadow all that God has already done

I think the best thing to do is to enjoy the very moment you are in because you will never see it again. The funny thing about life is that just as soon as things can turn for the worst, it can certainly turn for the best. It's all about the journey and trusting God from faith to faith. The rest will just have to take care of itself.

Not letting fear cloud my view....

~Mel

It's Not Always What It Seems

2010-10-07T19:10:00.000-07:00

The other night one of my girlfriends and I were discussing relationships and how men communicate. You know that conversation was 2 words long, 'They don't'. (Lol) Well they do, it's just how they deem necessary. Men have their own way of doing things and we just have to be willing to learn them. ( And who has time for allllllllll of that? lol) Many times we think their actions are revealing or saying one message and in actuality, it's a total different one. Sometimes you just have to wait it out. It really isn't always what it seems.

Don't you hate when you don't get an immediate call/text back from your significant other? ( I'm still pissy about a particular situation, but whatever.. lol) If you're like me, you always have your phone glued to your hand and you assume they do too. So when minutes lapse in response time my mind goes to work. I'm like, 'I know this fool sees my text, where is he at'. Meanwhile, when he finally responds he's like, ' babe, I was on the other line organizing a trip to Africa to save lives'. (Ok, maybe that's a little exaggerated, but you get it right? Lol). While I'm sitting by the phone with smoke coming out of my head like a cartoon character he is looking at the phone like, 'oh, I will hit her back later, she will understand'. Men are so funny when it comes to that though. Let me leave my phone in the car and have a few hours lapse between text messages. Honey, there will be a swat team surrounding my car because he reported me as missing. Lol. They cannot take their own treatment at all.

I think the interesting thing about being distinctly a woman and a man is our art of communication. We each have our own unique way of communicating issues. For instance, if I'm having a horrible day I will call and talk your ear off about it. Meanwhile, a man could be on the verge of a nervous breakdown and merely say, 'I'm ok babe, just tired, got a lot going on. I will be fine. I promise'. Many times we are saying the same things but in different languages. So while I am pouring my heart out trying to express my need to be supported, he's essentially saying the same thing by saying absolutely nothing. I know, I know, it sounds crazy, but some men operate that way. They just choose to operate in silence until they can determine their next move. No, it doesn't mean he's talking to someone else, it might just mean that he needs to be in a place of silence. He knows you love him and want to help him, but the best help you can offer sometimes can be found in silence. Men sometimes want you to keep the perception that they are superman, that they rarely lose control. The moment they feel that control slipping, an internal panic alert goes off and their minds completely go into overdrive. The last thing they need to do is answer a million questions from you. They don't even know the answer to the questions themselves. It's not you, it's them, don't let your mind start running rampant. (Clearly this entire paragraph is for ME. I am the queen of 21 questions. Had to learn the hard way though o_O ..lol )

As women, our worst enemy can be our imagination. We text him, he doesn't text back, we automatically play the 'assuming game'. We think just because we send a 6part text and he sends back 'ok' that he's just not into us or that he is dismissing our concerns. Many times a man has a million things running through his head and he's just trying to keep it all together. Men don't always want to show that they feel like they are losing control. They want us to be secure in the fact they are simply 'THE MAN'. But of course, we like to know all the details so we pry and pry until we think we are getting the answers we want.

Honestly, the best way to deal with communicating with a man is to listen to him when he talks. Every man has their own unique way of processing stress and dealing with conflict. Just because there is a 10min lapse between texts or a missed phone call or 2 doesn't mean your relationship is in the red. He might actually be doing something that requires more of him at the moment. I know it's hard to believe that something is more important than the texts you've sent him saying, "Babe, are you watching Oprah", or "Did you see CSI, wasn't that crazy?" or "Wait, your favorite color is blue right?". *side eye* Calm down, don't get pissed from a simple unanswered text. It might not be what you think. Just wait before you unleash the dragon. ( I currently have one more latch on the cage of my own personal dragon, pray for me...lol)

All in all...its important to love a man through his growing pains. The grander scheme of things is for you to learn more about yourself. You should walk away from every relationship with a newer understand of who you are. Whether he is your 'forever' or your 'for right now', you must allow life to takes it course and enjoy the ride. Stop stressing over what you can't control and spend time on building something solid. Truth to the matter is, if its meant, its meant. Nothing can change that. God has a way of revealing things to you. Don't disguise insecurity with 'women's intuition. God doesn't operate in confusion and wants the best for each of us.

So relax, and let love have it's way. Stop looking at the clock and the other people around you. Things will happen as they are supposed to. It's obvious that God has it all under control anyway. :O)

Looking at things for what they are and not what they seem...

~Mel

Don't Lose Sight of Who You Are

2010-10-05T14:58:00.000-07:00

October 5, already. 2010. Man. Time waits for no one huh? I swear, 10-15 years ago you could not tell me I wouldn't have been married to the man of my dreams, living in my dream home with a white picket fence, working a perfectly suited job and have 2.5 kids. It's funny, that fantasy world was so real for me for so long that I lost valuable moments that I could of just been 'living' in. I soon realized that I couldn't lose sight of self and I couldn't neglect the journey.

Honey, I abruptly woke up from that dream years ago only to realize life owes me nothing. The man I feel in love with in college turned out to be a mythical character. A story I obviously only believed. My white picket fenced home quickly turned into a room in my parents' lovely chateau. That 'ideal' job turned into a career of service, grant writing, and community activism. And those 2.5 kids turned into kids all over GA and FL needing my mentoring and coaching. At 28, all the things I wanted at 18 seemed to be warped in some type of alternate universe. Boy did I ever get a wake up call!

You see, I'm not saying I stopped dreaming or for you to even stop, but I don't think its necessary for you to throw in the towel on what God promised you. I think in life, it's important to understand the journey. Now, I'm no expert, but I KNOW that its necessary not to resent your path. No matter where it takes you. This has taken a lot for me to realize. I look at all of my contemporaries and what they've achieved and I look at my list of accomplishments and I've realized that we all have had our highlights. As much as I think I'm off course, there is someone that wants my reality. So I've learned to value mine all the more. At this point, it helps me to maintain my sanity. (lol)

I've met so many young professionals that ultimately have all that they desire but may be lacking that ONE thing they deem as the icing on the cake or their sense of 'completion'. Like marriage, a mate, a house, kids, different career, more traveling, etc. In pursuit of that 'ONE' thing they begin to lose sight of self. Who they really are and all that has gotten them to this point. Say for instance a relationship is ALL they want. They will do whatever it takes. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm 100% in when I have a man that I'm into but not at the expense of isolating myself from my family and friends to appease my new suitor. I'm not going to forge this super religious lifestyle to make it appear that I'm different than what I am. I'm not going to totally adapt to ALL of his ideals and abandon my own. And I'm certainly not going to stop being myself because he deems it as needing to 'change'. Sad thing is, I've been there before. I wanted a 'him' so bad that I started to lose me. I really thought if I did all I needed to do to get him, I would be set free. But honey, what a fool I was.

I wasn't fulfilled at work. I wasn't happy with my home buying quest. I was tired of having to be the 'someone' for everyone. Booooooy, did God kick me in the butt. The job I was 'over', turned into one of the most rewarding career tracks. Although the place ended up crumbling because it turned out to be ran by criminals, I truly went home in peace knowing I made a difference. A former student of mine had someone to contact me to tell me I changed his life. And the efforts of buying a home kept failing because God knew I would need to be home to help my mom with the loss of dad. These are tracks in my life that I definitely wouldn't have chosen for myself, but they have all been defining moments. They have all made me better, stronger, and wiser. So, apparently, they were all necessary. God knew all of that on (and before) May 11, 1982.

All in all, when I took of my rose colored glasses, it all made sense. Life is what you make of it. And the 'it' part happens to be all the things you experience. No matter what, your journey is unique to your purpose and it's a part of a bigger picture. No longer am I concerned with what 'seems' right or what I 'want'. I have had to totally abandon all of my idiosyncrasies. All my tantrums and rants about life have long stopped. Who cares what it looks like? Who cares where I am? Who cares who has something to say? It's a reason for it all and I am content (mmm, for the most part.. lol). This doesn't mean I stop pressing towards my goals, it merely means I stop thinking I have it all figured out. Honey, it's obvious I don't. Nothing has to make sense to me. God has total control. All that matters.

So when making my dream boards, dream book, dream collage, dream flash cards, and just plain dreaming, I am not going to be mad when God does what He wants. ( I have clearly had a lot of time on my hands to make all of those.. lol) He is well aware of my desires, but most importantly He knows what I require. I am confident in knowing that I am going to be ok. He is gonna work it out like HE'S BEEN DOING! (<-----one of my favorite things to say...lol)

Looking at the reflection in the mirror and knowing I'm still me :O)

~Mel

When You're Off Track, You're Still On...

2010-10-05T14:28:00.000-07:00

Whenever you're in Him will, you're never off track. From time to time I fall out of sync with my religious routine. Whether its a missed Sunday service, I forget to watch Joel Osteen one night, I may not write a blog post, or I may not call in to a prayer line. No matter how far off I may think I am off track, I'm still somewhat in line with what God wants for me.

When I finally get myself back in line, I walk into church and there is a message just for me. I turn on Joel Osteen, he is delivering a tailor made message. I write a blog post that provides healing for not only me, but many of the people I hold dear. And when it's prayer time, I am the one that delivers a prophetic word that encourages the people of God. Because I still have God's covering, no matter where I go, I am still on track. Despite what it may feel or look like.

You see, God has every single moment in our lives accounted for. The ups, the downs, the trials, the triumphs, the lonely nights, the mornings u wake up in tears, the nights where you're staring up at the ceiling. All of that. In the midst of my life's misstep or my sleepless nights I know its all somehow going to come together. I have to trust and believe that it's all bigger than this very moment.

I think about moments where I was literally living moment to moment, not knowing where I was going to work, where life would take me next, falling asleep with tear stained pillows, wandering aimlessly. Just existing. These were the moments where I grew closer to God. He was my only true hope. No my momma and daddy. Not my man. Not in a bottle. Not in a club. Not in my friends. The answer I sought could only come from God. In those moments, I had to fall on my face. Remember the old folks used to say, 'Baby, you just need a good fall on your face cry"? Well, I definitely have had my share of those moments. I was weak when I went down, but there was such relief when I rose again. The yearning for "what's next" could only be fulfilled by Him, and it was. When I was strengthened, I had a better appreciation for what I had and valued my journey.

Just recently a close friend of mine from high school messaged me to tell me she goes to my blog every time she gets on line and when she doesn't see any new posts, she is hungry for one. She went on to say that when I get back to writing, it seems that the message is specifically geared towards her situation. She said she could do nothing but cry after reading what I wrote. Even when I thought no one was reading my blog or that my messages were just for me, God always sent me people to confirm that my efforts were not in vain. More importantly, my obedience provided a breakthrough for some of God's other precious ones. I have been humbled to merely been used as a vessel for someone else. In the end, that's all that will matter. Who you have helped get closer to God and how obedient you have been on your quest to pursue your purpose.

Just like with your current situation. When you look back on this type of moment in your past, you can see God's handiwork just as clear as day. It took some time and reflection to see it, but it was there. God wants you to trust His judgement with this moment in your life like you always have. Its imperative that you let Him have it. Worry is not only the opposite of faith, but it can kill you. Don't let the enemy make you think you are not going to get your breakthrough. Many times, its the battle in the mind that's the greatest. God is just waiting for us to trust Him. Would you be willing to do that today? I think you should hold on to see what the end is going to be. This can't be it. You're story is NOT over. ( Believe me, I have to tell myself this OVER and OVER. My faith worked before, so it HAS to work now)

We have to be ever so careful to understand our purpose and know that He has our best interests at hand. We have to grasp the concept of reflection and appreciation. Reflect on what we've needed and how He's provided in the past. Every time it seemed like you were down to the wire, an unexplainable chain of events occurred. The grace necessary for that moment was granted. It was like money was being released from a hidden account just in the nick of time. Don't u think He can do that again? I do... As a matter of fact, He will.

Understand that the race is given to the one that endures until the end. Keep pushing, pressing, and persevering. Its not easy, but necessary. Know that you're not alone. Ever.

Even when I'm of, I'm on....

~Mel

Fly Spotlight: M-Red Designs

2010-10-03T16:12:00.000-07:00

Ok, so I don't often do this, but a lovely young man of God hit me up on Twitter and asked to be featured on my site. I said, "Hey, why not?" A young person following their dreams is pretty inspirational, it might wake something up in one of my readers. Please enjoy and be inspired my loves...

Stay Fly...

~Mel

Bio:

M-Red Designs is a clothing line that is centered around the art of fashion. This is the line that steps outside the box and add a touch of life to every piece of art work focusing on Urban/ Vintage Apparel.

At 12 years old, Mustafa Reddick started M-Red Designs. M-Red Designs uses creativity and loud colors to bring life into everyday wear. We have serviced many churches, youth groups, and social organizations. We create hand-painting, screen printing, air-brushing, and heat transfers items to wear and body art.

Seen on Neffe and Solo photo-shoot with DUDE and BStar. In addition, M-Red Designs is supported by V-103 Greg Street, Bishop Eddie L. Long, Yung Joc, John Gray, Edward Long, Comedian John Gray, and many entertainers.

M-Red Designs features in My Magazine 4 Girls, African American Lifestyle Magazine, Trendsetters 2 Trendsetters Magazine, 14th and Atlanta Talk Show, YGEA Awards 2010, 46 CBS Atlanta News, Mixx Masters Lounge Show, TBN, Gospel Channel, and more.

M-Red Designs was originally a hand-painting clothing line. Then introduced to airbrushing by an airbrush artist, Stan Zeigler, and taught to screen print by BStar and DUDE clothing. Now with other avenues this is a clothing line full of art and creativity.

What makes this line unique are grand hand painted imprints that are crafted exquisitely on every product we sell. We put a message in every piece, and creativity to it so no two will look the same. Our designs are apart of our line that will surely be around for generations to come. "People love to wear M-Red because they know it is one of a kind, fits the body just right, and makes them feel good," says recording artist Emi Morris.

M-Red Designs plans to become one of the best hand-painting/ screen printing lines because of our innovation and dedication behind our art. It is more than a drive, we have a passion for what we do; putting our heart and mind into the designs of every t-shirt making them please-able to everyone.

We are able to creative a professional t-shirt and use hand-painting skills to give it an abstract look, in that we are your #1 source for a creative design.

~M-Red Designs, 2010

Contact information: Mustafa Reddick ->mreddesigns@gmail.com

Who's Going To Iron My Cape?

2010-10-02T06:22:00.000-07:00

During my brief hiatus, my friends (and fans) were like, when are you going to blog again? What is up with you? Every time I went to the computer I drew blank. It was like I needed a jump start. What happens when the person who inspires needs inspiration? Then it lead me to the question of, "Who irons Super Woman's cape?".

Funny way to put it huh? But think about it, after Super woman and Super man get home, there was never anyone there telling them that everything was going to be ok, no one to inspire them to keep fighting crime, no one really to push them. I think about all the mega pastors, motivational speakers, and inspirational people in the world whose daily job is to motivate. How do they keep going? I mean, the answer may seem obvious, the bible, God, Jesus, His goodness, but sometimes you need something to push you ALL the way over the edge. You know what I mean right? I want to know what makes them wake up every morning to keep pressing towards the mark? What fuels them to excellence daily? The answer is simple, purpose.

( Going in a different direction huh? yup...) In my time of "silence", I really did some soul searching, "what is my purpose Lord? It's got to be bigger than this moment in time." And truth the the matter is, no matter how far you run, you will always operate in purpose. As I go through life, I always find myself talking to strangers, offering life advice, coming up with witty ideas, inspiring people that I have never met, you name it. Sometimes while searching for your purpose, you end up operating in it by default. Again, I go back to my dad. (sigh... I miss my teddy bear). He was a pastor for 27 years. When we moved to Atlanta, he didn't have to preach every Sunday, but honey, that didn't stop him from changing lives daily. I remember one day coming home and he was prophesying to a bill collector. Ended up calling out the lady's husband name out and told her she would be healed in her stomach. The lady dern near fell out on her job. All because my dad decided to operate in his gift regardless of the platform.

Many people say that what you do when no one is watching is deemed as your character. Can God trust you to change the lives around you just because? Are you willing to be in a place in your life where it is no longer about you? Do you feel that your purpose keeps you up at night? Are people drawn to you for no reason at all? You might have found your purpose. No matter what it is. Or maybe it has tracked you down and found you.

Back to my original question, "Who Irons Superwoman's cape"? The truth the matter is, that can be easy to determine in your own life, well, somewhat. I think it has a lot to do with the company you keep and the people you decide to pursue relationships with. You have to surround yourself with people who continuously remind you of your gifts and push you towards greatness. Of course you will probably do the same for them, but that's how it works. You have to find people with kindred spirits and are willing to be a blessing in your life.

Just last night,I posted 4 new entries and here I am thinking no one really reads this. Well, boy was I mistaken. One of my sisters in purpose was up all night in prayer needing an answer and found it in my blog. From me? It is always so incredible to be used as a vessel. No matter how many times it happens. Because of my obedience someone was able to get closer to God and closer to who God ordained them to be. You know they always say you're one person away from your breakthrough. You never know who God will use you as a conduit for. To be a blessing to one of God's chosen is enough for me. When you operate in the gifts God has given you, it doesn't really matter what kind of earth adoration and praise you receive. It makes God proud to see you operating in obedience. When you look back and see the lives transformed, it will all be worth it.

I think all in all, it is not easy to be one of God's chosen. You are held to a higher standard and you can't do what others do. But on the flip side, the favor and grace you are granted is like having a VIP card that not just anyone can obtain. Being on earth is merely temporary so we have to be wise with everything we do. God knew that this very moment you are in would exist. Isn't that amazing? He knew EVERY up and down you would experience. He also knew the victory dance you would doing at the finish line. Truth to the matter is, when you're on God's side, you really can't lose. You may have a tumultuous ride, but it's worth it in the end.

Regardless of who is ironing my cape, I'm all yours God.....

~Mel

The Power of Release

2010-10-01T09:23:00.000-07:00

Now, this is a post that is a LIFETIME in the writing. *sigh* .....Release. The power of release is incredible. Whether it is releasing someone who has hurt or disappointed you, someone who has purposely broken your heart, a job that turned you down, or even totally surrendering something over to God. Releasing is another one of life's hidden weapons. A weapon that is necessary to utilize at one point or another.

As you know, my dad was a pastor of a church in Miami. Last year, he transferred pastoral duties over to the assistant pastor and his wife. It was cool with us because we felt God was taking our family to another level in ministry so it was no biggie. During that time, we would get random calls about what was going on down there and how things were now being handled and of course I was NOT happy. Being the 1st official member of the church, I took everything personal. Whether it was my battle or not, I felt personally offended when something happened with my parents or with the church. So when dad died, we had to go down to Miami rather frequently to make sure things were running according to the legacy dad left behind. Well, on Mother's day, we went to visit and took a life size portrait of my dad to put up in front of the church. We had to present it to the congregation and talk about him. Well, of course, I broke down in the pulpit and had to be escorted to the car. I didn't even eat. I could feel the negative vibes of the people and I began to go from sorrow to anger within seconds. I had to flee the building. I had come to the conclusion that I didn't want to come back to the church and didn't want to be bothered with any of it.

Well honey, you know our ways are not always God's. I was supposed to spend the weekend of September 10th with my boo for his birthday but that ended up being a FAIL (you know I was super pissed), so I ended up flying to Miami with my mom to preach on September 12th. Which also happened to be the 6 month mark of dad passing. Earlier during the week God gave me the word, "Release". Here I am thinking I'm giving a profound word for the other people in bible study and it was for me. God was telling me to release all the ought and ill feelings I had so He could use me. So we get to service that Sunday and we received the usual "We miss y'all.. Glad y'all came... We miss pastor.." Blah, blah, blah. But one person in particular had a lil' attitude with me. You know the old me would of shot her the bird right in service, but I had already released her and her ugly spirit before I got to the church. My mom grabbed the mic and began to praise God from a place of hurt and healing. One like never before. God told me, "GO SING". You know I was fighting it tooth and nail. Well, low and behold, I ended up RIGHT in the pulpit, singing 30 minutes straight about breakthrough and God turning it around. People began to run the aisles, began to cry out, began to get healed, began to praise God like never before. All because of my obedience to the spirit and total surrender. In the midst of my releasing the hurt and pain I've experienced, God began to release my gifts and a breakthrough on my behalf.

You see, the enemy wants you to be so caught up in frivolous moments and people that you miss your opportunity to be used as a vessel to bless others and even to bless yourself. If we sit back and find the moments when someone allegedly pissed us off, we will realized that it's not worth wasting another day fretting over. While we are so caught up being mad, they are going on with their lives.

I was watching Oprah the other day and Terry McMillan was talking about how she just had to get up one day and release all the bad things her ex-husband did to her. Oprah had to admit the same thing that a woman had pissed her off 20 years ago and she she saw her laughing it up on the street. She was like, "here I am mad this lady and she has completely moved on with her life. She probably doesn't even know I'm mad". And that's the truth.

The enemy tries to get you trapped in that moment of offense that you don't move forward while the other person is moving through life like nothing ever happened. I think about my ex who is getting married. He probably has no idea how I can still get pissed off about somethings from the past. Meanwhile, he's planning a wedding and mapping out his new life, while I'm praying daily not to slip into depression and despair. I had to let him and all my past issues go all long, long time ago. It's just not worth it to me.

The true power of release is just that, RELEASE! When you let things go, you activate something in heaven. How can you expect to receive anything when you are so full of other things. If you want God to bless you with that job or that man, you have to let go all those ill feelings that you have harbored against things of the past. The beauty of release is the total surrendering to God. He can move through you if you are totally willing to be used. Release all inhibitions will allow God to move mightily on your behalf. There are gifts in your that are merely waiting to be activated and used to change the world. You need only release all the ideals you once had and adapt to those of God.

I'll telling you what I know, the power of release is so incredible. You should try it today and get to what God really wants you to have.

Releasing so God can release,

~Mel

I'm not weak, I'm stronger ....

2010-10-01T08:51:00.000-07:00

Man, it's October already. I can not believe time has flown like this. It's almost like someone pressed fast forward on life and it began to move at the speed of light. I have looked back over this year and I KNOW I was supposed to be in some one's mental institute or somewhere being half the person I was destined to be. But, God saw different. Everything that was lodged against me to break me has only made me stronger.

I used to hear old folks say all the time, "What don't kill you will make you stronger," and I used to dismiss it. I always used to think they were speaking in old folk tales as usual and kept it moving. Ooooooh but when March 12, 2010 at 3:42 pm hit, my life would change forever. Losing my daddy was like losing a vital organ. I can't even say the name Michael without tears streaming down my face (yup, I'm crying as I type). People had no idea the things he shared with me up until he suffered that stroke. It was like God was showing him that his time was drawing near. He wanted me to know that I was to carry on his legacy. I look back at all those moments and he was preparing me for some time now. Never would I imagine all those years of being his personal shopper would result in picking his suits for his funeral and memorial services. I literally experienced numerous out of body experiences during this time. This was supposed to be the moment where I said, "Dig a second whole in the ground because I don't know how life will go on." But God saw different. The very man who raised me helped me get through burying him. All the lessons, all the memories, all the laughs, all the good times, they were enough for me to let him go work for me on the other side in Heaven. Day by day, I get strengthened, but it doesn't make his absence any easier to grasp.

It's funny, all the moments where I thought I would break, I got stronger. When I had to walk away from a program that I single handedly built because of the lack of integrity of the organization, I thought I would LOSE it. I really haven't been the same since. To get calls and messages from kids who still need our program breaks my heart. That's how I know I found my purpose. When I know I could of been making twice the amount working somewhere else, I chose to stay at a place where I knew I was needed. Because of my obedience, God covered me. When the organization crumbled, I was so far out of reach, it had zero effect on me.

That's how God would have it. The things that the enemy wants to use to destroy you are the things that God uses to strengthen you. As you go through life, God will allow certain things to happen to you and through you. Don't get so caught up in what the enemy is trying to say that you miss God's lesson and His voice. God has you covered even in your darkest moments. Nothing the enemy can come up with can trump what God can do for you. None of it matters.

The moral of the story is: Use your tears to get stronger! That's the bottom line. Take your moments to grieve, get out your frustrations, voice your concerns, then press your way. I promise you, I can be in the middle of praying and helping someone else and I can just burst out into tears. Not because I am still suffering, but because I am still human. I miss my daddy more and more as the days go by, but I am not going to let that keep me from making it to the next level. More than anything, I want to be an example of what God can do for you in the midst of the storm. So when I win the lottery, get this PhD, have a wonderful wedding, have this beautiful set of twins, and drive off the lot with a Porsche Cayenne, everyone will know it was GOD and Him alone.

Mark my words, my story has yet to be told. Even within the next 7 days, I will have a praise report that will land me on Oprah. I just had to put it all in writing to let you all know.

Now let the weak say I am strong!

Stronger with each struggle....

~Mel

Leave It On the Alter and Find Something Else To Do

2010-10-01T07:59:00.000-07:00

So this morning, I was preparing for my morning run, but of course I got sidetracked with cleaning my entire bathroom and straightening up the rest of my room. I was a little behind but I felt good about my morning work out. As I stepped out of my door, I found a pair of flip flops that I had been HUNTING for over the last 2 months. As it turns out, my mom dropped them off sometime during the morning. You know God revealed a lesson in something as small as this right? He showed me that as you're busying yourself with things on the inside, I am working them out on the the outside. Every thing you THOUGHT you needed will be right at the door of opportunity waiting on you!

-PAUSE- I will wait for the weight of that to hit you! Do you see what God revealed ? Let me restate it again (lol). God merely wants us to do what we can on our side while He works everything else out on our behalf. That is something else. (You know I'm over here crying already). God knows that we can't do it all. It was never His intent for us to walk this journey alone, that's why He sent Jesus. He knew we would get weak. He know we would want to throw in the towel. He knew we wouldn't want to be bothered. He knew we would get off track. He knew it all. He merely wants our hearts to be towards Him so He can do a great work for us. It's kind of like when you were little and your parents gave you an allowance each week. You wanted something that was WELL out of your budget, but you saved what you could. Your parents took what you had and added to it and you were able to get that special thing you wanted. That's how God is. He takes all your effort and faith bundled up and puts it towards your breakthrough. Even when it looks like you might not have enough, God adds to it so you can have all that your heart desires.

Let me go back to this flip-flop story. (stop laughing..listen...lol). These were my precious Haviana flip flops. I have been HUNTING for these things for like 2 months. I sent out text messages asking folks had they seen (or stolen) them. I turned every table and chair over in the house looking for them. I just kept coming up empty. So instead of fretting over them any longer,I released them into the atmosphere. (I know it seems silly, but follow me). Like these flip-flops, I have also fretted over sources of income, my relationship, what's next in my life, and the list goes on. God merely said, "If you've placed it on the alter, why do you keep coming back to get them?" I could do nothing but shake my head. It's true. I wake up in prayer and go to sleep in prayer about the SAME things. I know God heard me the first 50 million times, but in my mind, I'm thinking I will get a quicker answer if I keep badgering Him about it. BAM! Not true. lol. God answers things in HIS timing. More than ever I understand that now.

The moment I stopped looking for my flops, I found them. And when they were found, they were literally at my doorstep, in plain reach. There was no mistaking who they belonged to and who they were for. God revealed to me that this is how amybreakthrough will show up. It will be in plain sight and no mistaken identity. It will be DIRECTLY from Him to ME. -PAUSE- Do you see what God is saying? He is saying that He wants to send you a special delivery but you have to do some straightening up on your end. You see, all this time you thought it was something else holding up your breakthrough. It was really YOU. (me included..lol)

Now wait, let me clear a few things up now. Just because God doesn't want you to fret over a job doesn't mean you stop applying. Just because God doesn't want you to fret over a relationship, doesn't mean you stop combing your hair and looking good. Just because God doesn't want you to fret over your next level doesn't mean you stop pursuing your dreams. God wants you to do everything on your side to push towards your destiny and He will fill in all the empty spaces. All He wants you to do is give 110% to see if you will be ready when the breakthrough comes. You must have the capacity to receive and maintain the next level.

So the next time you want to work yourself up over something that only God can do, STOP! Just stop dead in your tracks. Have a good laugh about it and look up to God. 9 times out of 10 He is looking back down like, "Look at -insert your name here-, he/she has no idea what tomorrow will hold. I have a blessing that he/she will not have room to receive. I can't wait to bless his/her socks off". Can you imagine that? Can you see God working on a tailor made breakthrough JUST for you? Well, if you can't, erase those thoughts of doubt right now! God can and WILL do that just for you. No matter what it looks like. Give it to Him and leave it there. I know I am. I'm done doing work that doesn't belong to me.

Taking it to the alter and finding something else to do,

~Mel

Silence is Golden....

2010-10-01T07:19:00.001-07:00

Lately I've been very quiet. Not just on here , but in general. Haven't really been talking on the phone much. Haven't really been tweeting like I usually do. Haven't even updating my status on Facebook as I normally do. I just wanted to be alone to figure somethings out. I realized that not only is silence golden, but it's priceless all the same.

During my moments of silence, I have been having numerous moments of self-discovery. I ask myself repeatedly, "What am I here for? God why have you given me another day to make it right?" The answer is always the same, "You will see." Being my anxious little self, my mind goes off wondering. God always urges me to be still and know that HE has it all under control. This is NOT the easiest thing to practice. Especially when you're always used to having the answers readily available.

When is the best time for your cell phone to charge? When you're not on it right? When it's laying dormant right? When a car is overheated and needs to cool off what are you suppose to do, cut it off right? When you're computer is acting up, you need to 'defrag' it and let it reboot right? Well, I think that should apply to us too. When you are in the midst of searching and redefining who you are in life, it's best to stay quiet and let God work you over.

In my quiet moments, I have truly perfected the art of listening. I listen to my own thoughts and the messages seem clearer. I can listen to what people say and not only hear their words, but actually hear what they are implying and what they truly mean. Most importantly, I can hear God clearer than ever. In the last 30-35 days, I have seen doors open that have once been closed. I have talked to people that I have written off. I have seen things happen that seemed like figments of my imagination. I have had vivid dreams that have revealed things that apply to my real life. From being silent, I have been able to understand life that much more.

My guy and I are so alike it's crazy. A few weeks ago he seemed very despondent. I was like, "babe, talk to me," he was like, "I don't have anything to say, I just want to be silent." Of course the human side of me wanted to catch a flight to Chicago and figure out what was REALLY going on. But I could hear God merely whisper, "Let him have his moment(s), he will be a better man after I am done speaking to him." And it hit me like a ton of bricks! Silence is not a moment where EVERYTHING is quiet, just you are. You can hear God much clearer if you just shut up! ( hate to put it that way, but it's true) If you're quiet, you can communicate more effectively because your words will be more calculated. People will value more of what you say because they know every word has been well thought out.

To me, silence is God's operating room. His time to work somethings out on your behalf. A few weeks ago, my mom taught a message on the power of words and how we can speak things into existence and even speak the demise of things. Just by speaking. You see, silence can be like a hidden weapon. When the enemy frustrates you, the first thing he wants you to do is to speak against what God has promised. If you're looking for a job and no one calls you he wants you to say, "I'm never going to have a job by October. God has forgotten me". Or if your waiting to be married or secure a solid relationship and it seems like it's never going to happen he wants you to say, "I'm never going to be married. Always a bride's maid, never a bride." You see, the enemy knows how powerful you are, I just wish you did! The mere words out of your mouth can make or break you. You must master the art of silence when faced with things that are opposite of what God has promised. If you can't seem to find the strength to speak positively into your situation, then SHUT UP! ( I mean that in the nicest way... lol) I'm serious though. You have to find a way to either say positive things to get you out of it or just be quiet.

The art of operating is silence is not easy, but every now and then you must activate it. I have heard God much clearer and I have seen things happen on my behalf that I know only He could of done. Sometimes it's best to stay out of it and let God do His thing. Besides, you wants better for you than God. He knows all that you need and want, let Him work it out. Stay silent for a few and watch what He will do.

In silent prayer.....

~Mel

Beware of Tailor Made Distractions

2010-08-26T22:19:00.000-07:00

As my journey in God treads a deeper course, I find myself running into more and more distractions than ever before. Its like when I say, 'ok God, use me', its a green light for all kinds of tricks of the enemy to be deployed. I'm like, 'wait, I'm on a mission for you Jesus, can I get some back up?'. And I hear God say, 'Don't u think I see all that's going on? Don't u think I know all that WILL going on?'. And all I can do is laugh. God is all knowing, these distractions aren't foreign to him.

I'm a quintessential homebody for all of those who truly, truly know me. I love to be curled up in my pink wool robe, listening to some sweet neo soul, or simply watching The Notebook. Or even just cooking up a new recipe from the Food Network. I just love the comfort of being at home. Well, every now and then I like to get all dolled up to hang with the girls or my homeboys. Now, my 'dolled up' definitely isn't some cute little dainty dress or skirt. I definitely press the envelope with my attire with a little skin here and there. Just enough to let know folk know I'm not some hog. Lol. Apparently I don't give off the 'church mouse' vibe because honey they come on STRONG!

Just this weekend I went to a few day parties with my girls just to catch up and make sure I still "had it" in a sense. I swear I'm a man magnet (or maybe its just my ancestry that follows behind me in the form of my glutious maximus. Lol). I usually attract the clean cut, 9-5 dude. But lately, I've been getting the NFL player looking dudes and of course, one finds me in the middle of this party. He was SO adamant that we were supposed to be together. Blah, blah. Now, God knows a few months ago I would have been at his house cooking up a meal and playing right into his maddness. Thank God for JESUS! lol. I can see right through follishness. He defintiely thought he was saying all the right things, but I am so over the month long romance BS. It really isn't worth tarnishing the budding relationship I have now. It's funny that the moment I find a man that is pretty much what I need, all these new tailor made distractions emerge. Honey, that devil doesnt have anything else to do. Once upon a time I thought I wanted to be with a football player, a coach, or just an athlete over all, and clearly the enemy knows that. Little does he know, I am so OVER that type of man. I abandoned that idea years ago, but that definitely didn't diminish my taste in men. I still love me a nice set of arms and shoulders. -->*saying Lord's prayer for strength* lol

I say all of this to say that the enemy knows just what you want like God. The package will be made up just like you like it and empty on the inside. The moment you commit to the things of God, the enemy pulls out all stops to get you to get off track. He knows what kind of thing can trigger you back to your old ways. Whether it be through your sex addiction, substance abusing, shopping addiction, using profanity, stealing, you name it. The enemy wants to do everything in his power to keep you from do that which you have committed to doing.

I have had to make a conscious decision to protect all that God has instilled in me and the purpose that He has assigned my life. Because I value who God has made me to be, I have to be mindful of what I do and where I go. No longer should I be content in the ways of the world if I know I am to be used in the kingdom. Its ok to hang with your friends, but even they should see and feel the difference in you. I have never been a drinker so when my girls invite me somewhere and begin to mention drinks they are like, "Oh that's right, Ms. Thang doesn't drink". I have already set a standard that I have yet to go back on. I shouldn't have to keep telling people who I am or what I believe, my character should speak for itself. My actions depict those of a person who is on a quest to get closer to who God wants me to be, so I can merely show them better than I can tell them.

Be wise in your walk and mindful of your talk. If you know you are prone to certain behaviors or weak in certain areas, avoid falling into the traps. Don't go to certain places. Avoid certain people. Stay away from conversations all together. Whatever you feel will take you away from what God wants for you, just stay away from it. Don't give the enemy any room for error. I think it is important to know yourself better than anyone else. What works for some may not work for you. Protect what God has placed in you at all cost, it will be worth it in the end. The stronger you become, the easier it will be to avoid those tailor made distractions. You will merely laugh at them. Trust me, nothing is worth losing the treasure God has placed in you.

Know that the enemy is out to distract you and keep you from kingdom living. Be wise in your walk.

Using my 20/20 to spot those tailor made distractions,

~Mel

Give 'em Something To Talk About

2010-08-25T00:11:00.000-07:00

You never know who is rooting for you. Have you ever heard the saying, 'If God be for you, who could be against you?'. Well, I live by that lovely quote. I think about all the people who have essentially spoken against my future. But recently, I've gotten the most random messages from friends all over. 'Girl we're rooting for you', 'You make me want to believe', 'I don't say much, but I'm so happy for you". I realized that we all have silent cheerleaders.

Throughout life, the enemy wants you to think you're all alone and that no one wants to see you do well. That is hardly the case. God always sends someone as a confirmation that there are other people in the world just like you. They too are looking for a new career change. They too are searching for a love that is filled with genuine kindness and reciprocity. They too seek an intimate relationship with God that is unconditional and pure. You see, no matter what you're going through, somebody somewhere is dealing with the same issue.

Through my blog and twitter, I aim to be transparent enough to minister to someone and perhaps change perspectives. I have had to put my pride aside to allow God to minister through me. As a result, God has sent people to confirm that my efforts have not been in vain. One of my associates who I don't talk to that often said, "Girl who is this man I read about. Does he have any friends? I am so happy for you. That's what I'm looking for'. I was like, 'Huh? When did I tell you this?'. She was said, 'Girl, we all read your blog. We may not comment, but we read every one'. It's funny, that day I was wondering if people actually read this blog and how it effected them. God kept telling me to keep writing, someone was being healed.

That really hit me. Imagine all the people that may be sitting court side watching you wait for your breakthrough. Taking notes,somehow trying to determine your secret. Wanting to understand your mindset. Trying to determine how they are going to do the same. Its amazing how God can use your situation to instill hope and deliver others. When you are going through just remember that you're not fighting for just your breakthrough, but that of many others. God is going to make you a pioneer of the sorts and you will be a witness to how God's grace is sufficient.

As I go through life's journey and experience all that it has to offer, I'm not going to be hesitant in sharing my story or my glory because someone is ultimately going to be healed as a result. I pray that I get closer to my breakthrough, I am able to help someone get closer to theirs. No matter what I go through, I know God will get the glory, so I'm confident in my story.

Continuing to give them something to talk about,

~Mel

Don't You Dare Shut Up!

2010-08-24T01:05:00.000-07:00

This has been one heck of a year. I think of all these past 8months has encompassed and I'm simply overwhelmed. Job, house, dad dying,financial roller coasters, family breakdowns, you name it, I've been through it. I didn't know I was built Ford tough until I had to drive through such uneven terrain called life. Through every situation I have had to SPEAK my way out. I have literally had to go directly to the Word, recall what God did, and SPEAK it over my situation. Eventually, change came. I realized that the ultimate goal of the enemy is to make us SHUT UP! And honey, I have been yapping ever since. (lol)

When I was little, there was no bigger curse word than 'shut up'. I can vividly remember sneaking to say it to my little sister when my mom wasn't looking. Mo would say, "Oooooooh, she said shuuut uuuuup'. I would get a good talking to and possibly a time-out. Saying 'shut up' was a major no-no. Now, as an adult, it's still a curse word. With God granting us the power of life and death merely through our tongue, wouldn't you think it was detrimental to shut up? Well if you don't, the devil surely does. He wants to do everything in his power to keep our mouths shut. He knows that we can move mountains, raise people from their sick beds, turn job situations around, restore relationships, and even shift the tides of change, with just our words. All of this with speaking? Yes, all of that and more.

If you go back through the Word, every great leader has had to seek God's face to get the right words and all they had to do was SPEAK over their situation. The very first book of the bible is a prime example, "Let there be light". BAM! There it was...light! He didn't say 'Let thouest flipeth a switch', He merely spoke light into existence and there it was. That's just how powerful words are. God loved us so much, He equipped us with those very same abilities. The problem is, we see the outline of trouble and immediately shut up. Instead raising the volume on our confessions, we cut the mic off all together.

We CAN NOT do that. That's all a trick of the enemy. He knows that God has given us that power and He's so afraid of it. I can remember numerous times this year where I would do nothing but cry myself to sleep. I wouldn't say my nightly prayers, I wouldn't do my confessions, I didn't speak things into the atmosphere. I just went to sleep. I didn't care what happened. Honey, I was such a fool to believe that. My mom said, "No ma'am, don't you shut up! You're gonna have to speak us out of this. God hears you, you better speak it!!" The moment I did, the situation began to shift overnight. Because I went back to speaking. I wasn't shutting up.

Stop everything you're doing right now and write down 3 things that you need God to move on. Once you write them, visualize them being done. Then begin to SPEAK the desired outcome. Do this until the change comes. Now, this is no magic spell or secret, this is an age old practice that people have been doing since the bible days. If you want something to change, you have to change the way you battle them. That's the bottom line. God hears you and will move on your behalf, but you have to believe it 100%.

I urge you today to keep believing and to keep speaking your way out of your situation. Don't let the enemy shut you up. You have to power to move mountains. Try God today!

Continuing to speak my way out of my right now,

~Mel

Something New

2010-08-23T01:02:00.000-07:00

Lately I have been quite introspective. Thinking. Waiting. Wanting. Listening. In a rather still place. Trying to hear from God. Trying to have an encounter with Him. Wanting something new.

You can be in God and in 'church' all your life but still feel a little off course. You can be following His commandments, memorizing every scripture, and knowing every hymn, but still feel a little unfulfilled. Kind of like a glass ceiling in the work place but spiritually. You can see the top clearly, but something seems to be holding you back. My spiritual eye is still keen, but I want to hear Him speak directly. My soul seeks a deeper encounter with Him.

In order to get that moment with Him, I have to intensify my worship, praise,prayer,and giving. I need to send an SOS message to get His total attention. He hears me and sees me but I just want a distinct answer from Him. I won't rest until I do. I wont' be made whole until I know that God is right there with me. I am certainly not lost, I just want more.

My guy and I were talking recently and he talked of just wanting to hear from God. Funny thing is, I'm in the same place. Just yearning for a deeper level. I've been saved for many, many years, but I'm ready for something more. A promotion spiritually. I know there is more to come, just have to push towards it!

In my quest to find a deeper level, I have to do more. That's the bottom line. I can't keep doing the same thing thinking it will warrant new things. I must do something to utilize my gifts, I need to spend more time in the word, I need to work harder towards my purpose, and I need to touch more lives. The moment I turn the intensity up in my works, He will not deny me. I'm ready for the next level like never before and I won't stop until I get it.

I guess this entry is one of those where it is really an open letter. I KNOW I'm not the only one. lol. We all have those moments where we are like, "Ok God, what's next, what do I need to do to get closer to you?" I think it's all a part of the process of becoming greater. When you have a yearning for something, you run faster towards it , you dig deeper to find it, you thirst after it. You have a tunnel vision that is directed only towards your goal, that is to be closer to Him. That's what He wants us to do anyway. Just to be closer to Him.

I don't know who this helped today, but it sure ministered to me .

Seeking the next while I'm in my now...

~Mel

Your Testimony Holds The Key To Your Power

2010-08-22T11:25:00.000-07:00

I was in church today listening to a message that really didn't put much fire under me. The elder has much revelation but her message it didn't possess that 'umph' that compelled folks to run to the alter like usual. She went through her whole message and it felt like she was holding back. She went back to her seat and came back to reveal her testimony and the church began to rock with praise. Her testimony possessed the power to push everyone to the next level. Then BAM!..the message hit us all.

You see, God allows you to go through life to experience things to minister to others. Now I know you don't want to hear that because neither did I. Lol. But honestly, when I share my testimony with others, people are totally encouraged and transformed. I'm like' what's the big deal', but they are like 'don't you see what God did for you? I know He can do the same for me'. I'm always left speechless and/or in tears. Man! God can use even me to be a blessing? How? Not lil 5'3 me. But yes, He can and DOES every single day.

I look back over the year I have had and how God has pressed greatness out of me. Above and beyond I could ever think. More than I could have imagined. When I tell my story now, people are captivated and encouraged. Not by my doing, but by God. He knew He would ultimately get the glory.

Think about your favorite artist or celebrity. You are drawn by their talent, but you are connected by their testimony because you can identify with them. Whether its drug abuse, molestation, dark secrets, marital issues, loss of family member, you name it, you find your way somehow connected. One of my favorite singers right now is Jennifer Hudson. Her tremendous loss felt like my own. I grieved for her like she was my BFF or even my sister. To watch how God lifted her up in her darkest hour encourages me everyday. God shows me it could be worse and that if I hold on, it can get better. Nothing is above being over turned by God. He's capable of doing it all. Trust me.

I say all of this to say that your testimony holds the key to your power. You wonder why so many ministers are able to rock the church with merely the murmuring of a few words or how a gospel singer can grab the mic and have folk falling out all over the building, it's because of their testimony. When you are enduring life's trials, you are forced to be face to face with God. God wants you to rely solely on Him. He yearns to give you lief changing encounters. When you are at your lowest, God can raise you up. When you get back up, you will possess a power like never before. Your faith will be renewed and you will be able to instill hope into others. Trust and know that your right now is not your forever. For God's grace is sufficient, even through your life's hardest trials

Allow God to keep working through you to help others. You are merely a conduit for someone's breakthrough. At the same time, someone is manifesting a breakthrough just for you. Even as I type this and you read it, God is breaking down strongholds for the both of us. I am standing in the gap believing that God will do just what He promised. The story has yet to be told. Keep holding on. Please. Just see what God is going to do. Your testimony holds the key to not only your breakthrough and power, but might just ignite the flame in someone else. Let Him use you.

Allowing my tests to manifests into testimonies to reveal my true power!

~Mel

You're Only Human....

2010-08-21T01:54:00.000-07:00

Lately I've been bumping the song 'I'm only human' by Zo and it truly touches my soul. It talks of a relationship that is not perfect, filled with ups an downs, but they love each other in spite of. That song really speaks to me. It makes me realize that no matter how great my relationship is, its never going to be perfect. I kind of okay with that.

Just this past weekend I went to visit my "guy" and his family and I had such a wonderful time. Seeing someone in their natural element is truly insightful. You get to see who they really, really are. I had a chance to spend time with his mom, who has such a genuine heart towards God. Of course she told me about him, but the one thing that stood out was her saying 'He's not perfect, but he's great'. That stuck with me. He's willing and ready for God to use him. That's just what I need. When someone is 'perfect' it means there is no work left to be done right? There's no error, no room for growth, no variation. Just perfect. Who wants that? Lol.

In relationships we have to strive towards excellence and completion, not necessarily perfection. The reason God brings certain people in our lives is to simply help us become better. I think about the men that have come in my life and what I've taken away from each relationship, good and bad, and I can see what God was (and still is) doing. In my relationship now, its easy, no pressure. I let him have his space when he needs it and I push him when necessary. He does the same for me. Never overdoing anything or trying too hard. I guess because we possess the same goal of being "happy", we are done with forcing things. Coming from the relationships we've come from, it feels good to just be who we are. And that is just perfect for us.

When your goal is to be closer to God, all other things fall in line. You have to make a conscious decision to love someone in spite of. Whether they text you back immediately or always take your call. Whether they remember every little detail or know exactly what to say. You have to love a person for their soul and whole they truly are, flaws and all.

I aspire to experience the kind of love that is in constant pursuit of euphoria. When I say euphoria, I mean a place that is filled with balance, happiness, understanding and a sense of completion. A love that shatters common definitions of love. One that is tailor made for he and I. That's all I am concerned about. What works for us. That's the thing when you are 'human', you can be just who you are. God will send you someone that 'gets you' and understands your purpose.

In the past I have been guilty of being jealous, petty, easily angered, all that not so good stuff. I'm over that. I refuse to allow the enemy to rob me of what God has blessed me and who He has brought into my life. I am not going to let the past dictate my future and occupy my present. That's operating in confusion and honey, who has time or energy for that? lol

So in efforts to celebrate my ability to be human, I am not going to hold back. I'm going to live life to the fullest and give my all every chance I get. In the process, I might just fall madly in love. If not, at least I can say I tried my best. With him, I'm not going to stress it, push too hard, or make him move any faster. I will love him with an Agape love and perhaps it will transform into that good ol' Eros loving. Until then, I will keep being human.

Humanly loving all that I've been given,

~Mel

If He Did It, He Will Do It !

2010-08-20T02:27:00.000-07:00

In these day and times, it's so easy to look at where you are and feel like you will never get to where you want to be. It's easy to become overwhelmed and feel like life has raged a war against you. Trust me, been there, done that, designed and sold the t-shirts for it. lol. In the midst of my angst and frustration, I am always reminded of when God delivered me. If He pulled through for me so many other times, this time will be no different.

In our weekly bible study, each of must bring a list of 3 things God did for us the week before, no matter how big or small. Before we can ask for God to perform another miracle on our behalves, we must remember what He's done in the past. The power of putting things in writing is simply incredible. Each week I have more than 3 things that God has done for me. Whether it is as small as finding a parking space, getting the last seat on a flight, meeting a man that makes my soul smile, or $1000 being in my account. God is in the business of taking care of those He loves. So while I'm remembering what God has done, I can confidently believe God for what He will do.

Just last night I did the closing prayer. I never really know what to say up until it is time for me to pray. So in the midst of me praying, I begin to decree and declare a supernatural financial breakthrough for each of us. For money to be in our accounts by Friday. Now, I was merely speaking things into existence. I felt in my spirit that God was stirring something up. So as I came back upstairs to have some private time, I get a text from my mom saying "you are a true prophetess of God. I just checked my account and I have an unaccounted for amount of money that just popped up." You see, I CONFIDENTLY prayed a prayer filled with expectation, it got God's attention.

I immediately began to praise God. Not just because money was showing up, but because it was clear that God was listening. That He heard every word spoken and has seen every tear that has fallen. This past weekend I visited my "boo" and we went to church where a guest pastor asked everyone to sow a seed to get a breakthrough. I didn't have my check book so I just emptied out my purse. It was on my heart to sow $100, but I forgot to leave a check with him to give to the church. God told me to sow the seed and mail it off. So as I finished talking to mom, I wrote a check to mail off to the church. On the way to Fedex, I was updating my cousin on bible study and she said, "Girl, I forgot to tell you I'm putting $120 in your account on Friday." I just started shaking my head. Within 4 minutes, God had already replaced the seed I had sown. Then I woke up this morning and my godmother left a $50 check for me on the counter "just because". Man, I already in the overflow zone and it hasnt even been 24 hours yet.

I am in awe of God and all that He continues to do in my life and those all around me. I just keep seeing how He covers me with His favor, grace, and mercy, I am simply humbled. God is so incredible. I am not perfect and I don't do everything right, but I'm exactly who I need to be in God's eyes. That's the amazing thing. No matter how far you think you are away from where you need to be, you are getting closer and closer to it everyday. So each day that I live, I am always in prayer. No matter where I am, no matter what I am doing, no matter the issue. Nothing is too hard for God.

One of my favorite stories in the bible right now is where Hezekiah asked God to lengthen his years and turn back the sundial. Do you know how DOPE that is? That God would do that for one person. That He would literally change the course of time, days, the orbit of the sun! I read that every time I think my prayer request is too grand or too hard. I have to stand boldly before his throne knowing that God can and will do just what I need him to do.

So in your life, don't think that God hasn't heard your request or that His grace no longer covers you. He hears every word. Trust him. Hold on. Don't give up. If He did it then, He will do it now. It's only a matter of time.

Trusting and knowing that it WILL be done,

~Mel

Don't Stop Dreaming.....

2010-08-19T15:10:00.000-07:00

Well, I guess you all want to know what have I been up to huh? Well, if I had all day I would be able to tell you. lol. Buuuuuuuuuuuut, since I don't I will bring you up to speed for the most part. Since leaving my other "job" I have constantly been asking God, "What is it that you saw me doing"? Each time, God tells me its already before me. Everything I need in life, I already possess. So I keep pressing forward each day finding inspiration in the smallest things and find my way closer to what I think God wants me to be doing. In the midst of my journey I have been writing and just doing me. Somewhere along the way the right person was reading and it lead me on a journey that has simply made my heart overflow.

When my father first became ill, I felt like the world around me was crumbling, I simply didn't know how we were going to sustain a loss of someone so substantial. It was the most frightening journey that I have ever taken. Being the oldest of 3 girls, I was my dad's best friend. He was my confidant. He and I used to talk about everything. When he died, I didn't know how to put my words together like I used to. I am not an extremely verbal person when it comes to my most inner thoughts and feelings, so I took to writing. Whether it was an inspirational tweet, a riveting quote on facebook, or a thought provoking blog post, I found a way to get it all out. All while I was writing I was not only being healed, but I was ministering to a man 600 miles away. He too was on a quest to get closer to who God wanted him to be and my words soothed his journeying soul. Somehow along the way, our souls began to speak to one another. Our worlds collided one day in Atlanta and have been inseparable ever since. I, like Ruth, was found in the midst of doing what God asked, and have been blessed as a result.

I didn't write this post to be all lovey-dovey, although that's where I am right now.. lol. I am writing this to encourage you to keep dreaming. Never let go of your conception of happiness or what you think you deserve. You see, I have always had this "idea" of what I wanted in a man or what I thought he should look like and people always told me to snap out of it and be realistic in my approach. I never argued with them. I always went to God in prayer about the man I was to end up with. I prayed for a man that loved God, treated his mother right, respected & emulated his father, loved his siblings, had a solid career, an entrepreneurial mind set, a heart for the community, a great dresser, a smile that melts my soul, eyes that told me it would be ok, and a level of passion that matched mine. Not that unrealistic right? Right.. lol.. I continued to hope for this man that seemed like a figment of my imagination knowing someday I would encounter such a being. I knew that if I prayed enough and stayed on the right path, I would run eventually run into him.

I am here to tell you that my dreams are my right now. I crossed paths with my "him" and I have been so blessed. I have never met a man kinder, more hopeful for the future, more resilient, more open, more internally sound. This man has renewed my hope on so many levels that words cannot fully encompass that which I am experiencing. I am not one to reveal all that I truly feel but I would be remiss if I did not write an ode to the man who has helped me dream again. I have always been whimsical in my thoughts and aspirations for the future, but never would I have imagined he would find me miles and miles away. Believe me, we are not perfect, nor are our circumstances, but he has renewed my belief in finding a genuine soul. The more I get to know him, the more I am sure. Meeting his family, learning his history, understanding his past, makes me all that more aware that God is able to do just what he promised to do.

I think more than anything, I know that when I dream, I must be specific. I have to know what to look for when it finds me. The funny thing about God is that while He answers our prayers, He will still make sure our "answer" is saturated in purpose and with pure intentions. No matter what we think may be right for us, God always tailor makes our breakthrough. I am confident in knowing that is what He has given me in him.

It's almost indescribable. Its like believing in a rainbow and you finally see one up close and in person. You are merely speechless. Not only is the rainbow remarkable, but the fact that your belief has not been in vain. It's funny how the enemy makes you think you're crazy for holding on to what God promised. Like you are a fool for believing that you will someday get what you deserve. I am here to tell you that you need not stop believing. Hold on to what you want and to what God said he would do.

I don't know what road he and I will take in the future or what is in store, but I know what my heart feels....full. To know that God has me in the palm of His hands in the midst of my life's storm is the greatest feeling in the world. During one of the worst times in my life, God was able to send me a tailor made man for my circumstances and my journey. Don't get me wrong, I am not making this man to be a super hero, because those certainly aren't my intentions. I know he's not perfect and that things won't always be rosey. I just know that God has blessed me immensely by sending this man in my life. I will do everything in my power to be a blessing to him as he has been to me. Words cannot express the way he has transformed my belief. For that, I am forever grateful.

I leave you with this, "If you stop believing, who will you be disconnecting from? Whose life will you be altering? What part of the universe will lack because you have chosen to give up? What soul will be empty without you?" You can be the missing link to some one's greatness. All it takes is a moment to change some one's life. Some of us will be so fortunate to find someone to make us whole for a lifetime. God can do it, just keep believing.

Loving every minute of this dream because it's now my reality,

~Mel

Moving in Confidence

2010-08-19T09:10:00.001-07:00

Yeah, I've been on another "break" I know, I know.... lol... But I always come back stronger so journey with me for a moment will you....

Over the past month, I have experienced SO much. From financial battles & triumphs, family issues, relationship growth, travels, miracles, you name it! In all that I've been through, I have seen God's hand like never before.

Financially, this has been the most liberating and testing time of my life. I have had to trust God every step of the way while moving in confidence and in faith. When I left my job, I had no real plan ahead, I just knew I had to move in obedience and I had to move swiftly. Never would I have known that my father would pass shortly after that. Or that I would have to help my mother keep both households together in 2 states. Or that I would go on over 15 trips in a 5 month period. Or that I would be the spiritual backbone for my family. Or that I would find a way to financially support myself and not have a traditional 9-5. I have had to stand confidently in what God told me to do.

Just recently I reached my 6 month mark of unemployment and you know I was about to jump off a 1 story building.. lol. I was like "WHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAT!!? God what am I going to do?"I had to calm myself down immediately. But I kept hearing God say,"Trust me". I had an erie calm come over me. I called the main office and asked why it had been suspended and they told me that the state's resources had been exhausted until Congress decided otherwise. So for 3 weeks I lived as though I had money coming in, I chose not to focus on the unknown. Instead of being depressed and living like someone who didn't believe God, I got to work in the spirit realm. I literally had to be picked up off the floor from praying and crying. As I began to go boldly before the throne, declaring that God give me a 24 hour turnaround, I felt a shift in the atmosphere. Breakthrough had occurred. When I woke up the next morning, I had ALL my back pay of money and a little extra in my account.

You see, as my back was up against the wall, I didn't fret, I didn't curse God, I didn't get upset. I prayed and cried. Then cried and prayed. I knew God was up to something, I just had to press my way out of it. He literally showed up in the midnight hour and delivered me.

For the past month, my mother, my sisters, Godmother, cousin and I have been having weekly bible study. With my parents being pastors we have lived and breathed church, but God said what we did in the past is not all that we will do. There is still work to be done. So my mom got in her spirit that she was supposed to start a women's group amongst us and then open it up to others. The moment she was obedient to this task, God began to break strongholds and fight battles that we have long been struggling with.

We have had to stand confidently in what God has promised us. Confidence is not fearing the unknown, it's looking it right in the face and knowing that God is more than able. Confidence is knowing that He will do just what He said he would do. Confidence is knowing that he will do it, helps us remember that He did do it, and understand that He will do it.

I think over the past month, I have gotten even closer to God. Not just because I needed "stuff" but because I needed the comfort in knowing that everything will be ok. Knowing that someone had my back and loved me unconditionally. I am so strengthened to know that my story has yet to be told.

I leave this scripture with you from Hebrews 10:35-36- "So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what He promised."

(*insert shout here* This is SUCH a powerful word!)

I am confident that the best is yet to come and I'm waiting for it.

Confidently speaking,

~Mel

They Miss You When You're Gone....

2010-07-09T05:41:00.000-07:00

So last night, like the rest of America, I was sitting around waiting to see where LeBron James was going. Being the educated sports aficionado I am (yeah right...lol), I had done my research and heard it was pretty much a done deal for him to go to Miami. But, I still tuned in and participated in the hype with the rest of country. Within moments he made one city overjoyed with hope, love, and anticipation, while his hometown yelled in outraged, burned his jerseys and cursed him out. I was like, "WOW, the man gave y'all 7 years, wasn't that enough?". He had gained an instant group of fans and haters all within one statement, "I'm going with The Miami Heat".

Isn't that just like in relationships or on a job where you are ready to take it to the next level? Where you want something more? Where you are simply not content? You give a man years and years of your life, only to end up fruitless and hopeless. Or on a job where you give all of your talent and hard work, only for them to give your promotion to someone else. The moment you threaten to leave, they start to scramble to find ways to keep you. Like the thought of you being with someone else or another company makes them sick. I find it hilarious.

When I look back over my past relationships (one in particular), I think about the things I endured and the issues I looked over, I was so unfulfilled. At one point, I decided to walk away. When I tell you the flowers came flooding in, dinners were cooked, calls wouldn't stop. As soon as he thought he couldn't have me anymore, he got sick. We played this game for a few years. Through other relationships, we always seemed to have some sort of tie. Through phone number changes, city changes, job changes, we always found ways to stay connected. The moment I said I was no longer interested in having any contact, he was not happy. Over time, he began to see what an asset I was to his life, but it was too late. I saw way too many other offers out there. I was hot stuff! lol. A lot like Cleveland and LeBron James. Now that he is gone, his importance is far more realized.

The funny thing about moving on is that you are able to explore other options and further define who you are. When you look back at where you began, you begin to understand why God allowed certain things and why He has ended others. Sometimes we find ourselves in relationships or jobs where we are not appreciated and are often taken for granted. We know we deserve better, but don't take the steps to find something better. I urge you today to be like LeBron, remember the good times, but don't be afraid to step out and make new ones with a new team. A new team could be a new city, a new job, a new life, a new relationship, you name it. You deserve to be treated at your worth.

Sometimes is takes the right combination to bring out the best in you. It may take a major step of faith on your behalf. You cannot sit back and believe something will happen without actually moving in the direction of it. If you believe God is telling you to make a career change, don't busy yourself with all of the details, keep praying for the right connection and the rest will fall into place. If you believe God for that husband/wife, don't get caught up in what you experienced in the past or even small imperfections, trust God for the right person to be placed in your path. When you totally surrender to God, your past will be just that, a thing of the past. You will be driving away into your destiny, looking at all the "nay-sayers" in the rear view mirrors.

Be like LeBron, throw on your shades, suit up for the game called life, and be ready to give your all. They will miss you when you're gone, but imagine all the new things that are ahead. They can all be yours if you merely believe. You deserve it!

They miss me everyday as I keep walking further away....

-Mel

Don't Forget to Remember

2010-07-08T20:13:00.000-07:00

Well, today is July 8, 2010, which would have been my father's 54th birthday. Needless to say that today was a little rough, initially, but I got through it. I think the comfort in knowing that my father was such a good man helps me daily. Knowing that he lived his life helping others and living life to the fullest, is pushing me to do the same. Days like this force me to remember and that's something that I vow never to forget to do.

So many times we go through life living in fast forward. Living for the day, not remembering where we've come from, what God has delivered us from and who we once were. We forget to remember. We forget those moments that have shaped us, those defining moments that were instrumental to who we have become, those moments that are forever in our hearts and minds.

Initially, I wanted to spend the day crying about missing my daddy and all the things I wanted to do, but God just wouldn't let me. I felt him all day. I could hear dad saying it was going to be ok and that I had all I needed to move forward in life. That's the thing about memories, they are more than moments in time, they are moments that create who we are today. When we tap into those moments from the past, those good moments, it's like an energy recharge. Wonderful feelings come rushing back in.

I know that I have to release my dad spiritually to the Heavens, but I will forever have him in my heart. All the teachings about being a dynamic woman of God, a wonderful wife, and an individual will forever resonate in my heart and mind. Days like today make me realize my memories are so rich that I have everything I need for the future. When I cry, it is not out of sadness, but out of celebration. Celebrating the memories that I was blessed with, as well the hope I have for the future.

I won't forget to remember all that I've had because I know it will prepare me for all that I will have :O)

Never forgetting to remember,

-Mel

Here is a video of my dad last year saying Happy Birthday to himself. Speechless every time I watch it.....

I Can See Better In The Dark

2010-07-07T08:56:00.000-07:00

Since getting back from my travels, I have been trying to get the house back in some sort of order. I've cleaned up from top to bottom. In the kitchen, everything is made from real wood and marble, so I have to use a separate set of cleaners. As soon as I thought I was done scrubbing, I sat down at the breakfast table, only to find a hideous water mark. I cut on all the lights and wiped it down and was on my way. Then my mom tells me, "cut the lights OFF, and you will be able to see better." I was like, "huh? that makes no sense." But I did and I was able to see all that I needed to see in order to clean the table properly. A natural light came in the room and my eyes began to adjust. It's crazy, but I could actually see better in the dark.

Now, at first you might be like, "seeing better in the dark, Melissa where are you going with this?", but trust me , it makes all the sense in the world. In the natural, we cut the lights off and we are initially blinded, everything is blacked out, but then within moments, our eyes adjust and we begin to see as if the lights were on slightly. It's like God turns on night vision for us. The same applies to life's darkest moments. When we initially can't see what's next or how to get out of a situation, but somehow God gives us the ability to see.

I look back over my life's darkest situations and I know it was God that got me through, just no other way. I always go back to the recent loss of my dad and how I didn't think I would be able to function ever again. Somehow, my vision became clearer during the process. I got closer to seeing my destiny, I saw who was truly in my corner, and I could actually see where God wanted me to be. It's like I received a supernatural gift of sight in the spirit. In my darkest periods of life, God allowed my spiritual eye to have keen vision and understanding. It was not only for me to know what He wanted for me, but to see it.

You see, God allows dark moments in our lives not to destroy us, but to strengthen us. Think back at all the moments in your life where you felt all alone and hopeless, who did you have to pull on? Who was your only hope? How were you able to "see" your way out? God right? Yes, it was Him. That's the thing, God has already seen your low,dark moments but He has already seen you in victory, triumphing over your life's adversities. Sounds like someone that has the inside tip huh? Someone you truly need to keep in your corner.

As you go through life experiencing ups and downs, don't lose hope and feel like you're in the dark, trust God to see your way out and wait for Him to send you some supernatural help. Not only can He do it, but He WILL. We need only trust in Him. Know that even in your darkest moments, you will be able to see the greatest. It's all about perspective and trusting God. That's all we can do.

Seeing in the midst of darkness,

-Mel

Be You... Who Else Will Be?

2010-07-06T09:47:00.000-07:00

Yeah, I know I have been a little "incognegro" for the past few days, forgive me, I have been travelling quite extensively lately. It's a blessing though. I just came back from a girls weekend in New Orleans for The Essence Music Festival. Boy, what a trip! I learned so much about myself and others that I swear I will have an entire book written. lol. Out of all the things I learned, I learned that if I am just myself, that should be enough. Even if it seems like a lot for others.

Anytime you put 4 different women in their late 20s in one room, you are bound to have some personality clashes, disagreements, and "intense" conversations. And honey, we truly had all of the above and THEN some. lol. We were able to get through most of our discussions without feelings being hurt, but each of us stood strong in our opinions. The one incident that stood out to me was when I was getting dressed. Anyone who knows me knows that I LOVE eyeshadow and lipstick, bright colors, funky shoes, and TIGHTS.. lol. If I could pursue a career of make-up artistry & styling, I would probably do it for free. But anyway, I was getting dressed and my girl was like, "are you going to wear ALL of those colors and that lipstick?" I turned around like, "Yeah, what's the problem?" She was like, "Oh nothing girl, I just know I would look like a drag queen or a show girl if I did it, but it's cool for you." You know I got a lil' attitude right? I had to pull my response together so I wouldn't sound like I was offended. I was initially taken aback, but I realized that everything isn't for everybody.

In life, people aren't always going to agree with what you do and who you are, but that should never stop you from being exactly who God ordained you to be. Now, many of my friends think I am a little "over the top" with my dress & style, my humor, and my approach, but it works for me. It has gotten me national exposure on television, radio, newspapers, magazines, and even the Internet. Just by being me. Never second guessing what I say or do. Never thinking twice about why I wear what I wear or even when I wear it. It feels good to be "different". It's really all I know.

My whole life, my parents have encouraged individuality. I can remember growing up and having a pair of hot pink cowgirl boots. They were the flyest shoes to me. (Now mind you, I was only 3 years old..lol.) I would wear them everywhere. To the store, to church, even with my uniform to pre-school. My mom said I loved those shoes, so she let me wear them. My mom didn't think I was being a brat, but instead developing my style, my personality, who I was to become. To this day, I will rock a funky pair of kicks, whether they match my outfit or not, just because.

If I ever stopped being me, then who will? Who will be the fabulous "rainbow brite" that stands out in a crowd and is not afraid to rock orange lipstick? (yeah, I definitely wore some this weekend. lol) Who cares if other people don't understand it. Who cares if people don't know how to process who you are? It's a reason for everything you do and all that you are. When you being just you and are out in the world, it will attract the right person/people in your life. Just being you will open the right doors, will have you in the right place, and have you walk into your destiny. Never water down who you are to appease anyone.

Being who you are goes beyond style and what you decide to wear. It goes deeper to how you pray, how you forgive, how you bless others, how you hold on to your faith. All of that. You have to develop a formula that works for you. One that pushes you closer to your destiny and closer to God. That's the ultimate goal. To become who you are destined to be. Never stop holding on to what God has placed in you, no matter what others may think. You are you for a reason and nothing else really matters. As long as people can see the light shinning in you that God has placed there, you're job has been done.

Standing strong in who I am,

-Mel

Be Ready When It Comes

2010-06-30T10:30:00.000-07:00

Many of my girlfriends and I have been on this journey of self awareness, life definition, and finding that "one". With this journey it has taken great faith, supplication, and belief. We have had to deal with a lot of counterfeits, experienced many disappointments, and been on an emotional roller coaster. Through it all, we have held on to what God promised and never looked back. The funny thing is, the tides are changing. The things we've prayed and cried for are coming to pass, but are we really ready?

My girl and I were talking about the dating scene recently and thinking about all the men we've dated and the ones that we are "thinking" about being with now. Man, God really might be answering every prayer. I mean, we've gone from relationships where we've carried the load, gone to sleep crying, paid for anything they asked for, and given 150% where they have given only 50%. We have been THROUGH it with the men in our past. Now, we are faced with a new breed of men that open doors, send flowers just because, email notes to say "I'm thinking about you", and are ready to scream their affections from the mountain tops. This breed of men is ready to love you just like God promised in the bible. But are we ready?

Have you been praying and crying so long for something that when it gets to you and you don't see it? Have you been making so many dream boards and books that you forgot what your dreams look like? Have you been so busy hating the things in your past that you have lost hope for the things in the future? Well, if you're afraid to admit it, I certainly am not. I have been guilty of letting the "right" things pass me by because I am so consumed by what I used to experience. It's naturally human to operate in hurt, but that is not what God wants for us. He wants us to believe beyond our current situations to what He has promised.

With God you have to know that He has your best interest at heart. Whether it looks or feels like it in this very moment, He has a greater plan for you. He knows exactly who you are supposed to be with, exactly where you need to live, all the places you should go, and exactly what you should experience. God makes no mistakes. Now, this is BIG for me to say all of this because I question a lot of the things that I and my family have gone through. Still with no clear answers, I know God is greater than the moment I am in now. I cannot stop believing.

I know that the man of my dreams is on the horizon. I have seen glimpses of him recently and I am overjoyed. But instead of rushing into anything, I am in a state of praise and continual prayer. The same way God brought great people in my life, He will do the same in the future. In this season, I am operating in wisdom and understanding. Overall, I am operating in patience. I know that nothing with God comes without prayer. So as I pray and expect things to happen, I am confident that God has everything I need right on the horizon.

Confidently praying for the future,

-Mel

Someday may never come.....

2010-06-29T10:14:00.000-07:00

I really didn't have much of a "theme" for today, but more of a talking point. I woke up this morning thinking about what I dreamt and all I could remember was the smell of my dad's cologne. In my dream, my dad was telling me that he missed me and that he wanted to share how to continue the business. By the time I woke up, it was all a blur. I just laid in bed and thought about all the moments we once shared and how he constantly wanted to make everything we did a "teaching" moment. It's like everything he taught me I am now in the midst of living out. Everything I've learned is everything I am.

In life, we collect experiences, capture images, and record conversations and they stay in our minds. They eventually shape our beliefs, our understandings, and our opinions. What we do becomes who we are. Everything that we go through is pivotal to who are. I think about all the people I've met, dated, loved, befriended, disliked, had issues with, and learned from, and it seems that I have taken a little bit of each of them with me. Each time I've walked away from a situation, I made sure that it was a "teaching" moment. That is what daddy taught me. It's important that you go through life as a student because eventually you will become a teacher.

This morning I texted a good friend of mine about my dream and he got excited for me. He said my dream was merely a reflection of what an incredible woman my dad raised. I was so touched. It's amazing how someone can see such greatness in you that you are often blind to. The most profound thing he shared was, "someday is another word for never". #message.... It's the truth. If I keep saying that I will "someday" carry on my dad's legacy, then I may never get to doing it. We always hope that "someday" finds its way to us, but many times it doesn't.

I just got off the phone with my mentor of almost 20 years and she was in tears. She told me that she was in Atlanta and wanted to get with me. I asked why she was in town, since she was from Miami, she said that her son-in-law had suddenly passed. He daughter and son-in-law were celebrating their 20th anniversary on Sunday and were preparing to go out on the town. He went to the couch to lay down for a sec while she got dressed. As she was in the shower, she heard him yell out her name. She ignored it the first time, but them heard it again. By the time she came in the living room, she found him face down on the floor. He had died of a massive heart attack on their anniversary. He was only 39 years old. They had been sweethearts. The doctors report said he had an enlarged heart and it decided to explode on that day. This was nothing short of heartbreaking.

I promise this was the saddest story I had heard in a very, very long time. It almost made me more at peace with my dad's story. At least I got 2 weeks to say good bye to him everyday instead of coming home to see him face down on the floor.

In life, you may not get another chance to say I love you, or good morning, or I miss you, you have to say it time you feel it. The next moment is not promised and we don't have forever. Say it right now.

Someday may never come, so relish in the day you have right now.

Hoping that my days make a difference.....

-Mel

Just Because I Don't Like It, Doesn't Mean I Can't ...

2010-06-28T09:06:00.001-07:00

Well, I finally had the chance to take a breather with my family and decided to head to Vegas. My baby sis turned 16 and we wanted to do something different. So for about 3 weeks we played around with the hotel packages and flights until we got a decent rate. Seemed like we were NEVER going to find something that fit our likes and our budget. About 2 weeks before the trip, my mom and middle sis stayed up until 3 am and found the ideal package for us and we were on our way to Vegas baby! We get here, we are ecstatic, we love the atmosphere, we deal with the heat, we get to our hotel room and BAM!......we hate it! lol. Of course the pictures online promised this grandiose layout with great amenities and accommodations, but they weren't any of the sort. But guess what, I said, "I may not like it, but I am grateful." #message

You see in life, we build up these illusions of grandeur of what we want certain things to be whether it be in relationships, a vacation, a job, a car, you name it. We often put a lot of expectation in things then when it doesn't measure up, we are left in disarray. In our minds things should be one way but often fall short. It's funny how the visions in our heads don't materialize in our lives. It shouldn't stop us from dreaming and expecting, but it should instill a better sense of reality and a greater ability to be grateful for what we've been given.

I look around at this room like, "PUKE", but then I remember what it took to get here. The sacrifice, the things we've been through this year, the late nights doing research about vacation packages, all of that. The fact that so many people want to be in this very position, whether it's the "perfect" room or not. The fact that we made it is a miracle all in it's self.

That's the way life is though. We create these images in our heads of what marriage and/or relationship should be and they end up being far from that. That may not be a bad thing though. What works for one couple, may not work for you. Allow God to mold your "perfect" situation and stop trying to throw your own spin on it. Even when it comes to your mate. There are definitely some specifics that you want him/her to have, but don't find your self nit picking your potential other to the point where you talk yourself out of what God has for you. I know I am guilty of it, even as we speak. Whether it be a physical flaw, one character trait, something in their past, or one thing that they may have said. Learn to look at the bigger picture.

One person's jagged edges can fit perfectly into your puzzle pieces. Their imperfections can magnify your perfections. The areas where you are most weak, they can be strong in.They can be that person that can make you appreciate what you do have instead of the few things that you may lack.

I think the place I am in now is a pretty decent one. Yes, I miss my dad, but I am grateful to have had one to instill such greatness in me. Yes, I wish I was still working with youth day to day, but I am grateful to have gifts and talents to sustain me during this season. Yes, I wish this room was greater, but I am glad to be in an ideal place on the strip to experience Vegas at it's best. We all have to come to a point where we find the greatness in every gray area in our lives. Eventually, those areas will seem brighter as well.

It's all about perspective.

Looking ahead and not behind with a spirit of gratefulness.......

-Mel

Battle of the Ex's: We're Not Close Anymore... Are We?

2010-06-26T07:52:00.000-07:00

You see I have been on this relationship kick lately. lol. Clearly this has been the topic of discussion for me and many of my girl and guy friends.

Ok, this whole "ex" thing is driving me crazy. With the circle of friends that I am in and was in college, a lot of ex boyfriends and girlfriends have been thrown back into the pool of availability. I have recently, accidentally dipped into this pool. Totally oblivious to the "lineage" of the current boo and a chick I was once cool with in school.

WHO CARES?????? lol. I mean, are we REALLY obligated to never "talk" to each other's ex's when we haven't spoken in literally 5+ years? No right? I didn't think so. With all the use of twitter and facebook, people are acquainted that probably would not otherwise meet or speak. With that being said, people meet people that have no idea know people that are from someone's past.

This has literally happened to me twice. Like, recently. So I am now faced with having to not speak to some chick in my past. Not that we've spoken in the past 5 years, but still, in hopes of not seeming like a low-life, sneaky person, I have to have the uncomfortable conversation of, "Hey, I'm with your ex now, hope it's cool. Even it's not, I'm still kicking it with him. And yes, it's getting serious." I mean, do I owe them that? We were once cool, but haven't spoke in YEARS. Even with all these methods of staying in touch, we chose not to.

I guess I am posing this question (rhetorically) because it is happening to so many people I know (and me obviously...lol). We are able to portray parts of us online that may not have otherwise been noticeable in school or in passing. So now we have the opportunity to connect with people miles & miles away. I guess that's when technology becomes a blessing and a curse huh?

If you just so happen to fall for an ex of a former friend, do what you feel in your heart. Prayerfully it will work itself out. Well, the thing about it is, if God has it ordained for you to be with a certain person, it really doesn't matter how it happens or who it is. He has someone set aside for you. God does not operate in confusion, so all it requires is prayer and an adult conversation. There is never any need to stoop to the level of a person who is not able to handle things maturely.

Besides... all things are fair in love & war...

May the best woman end up with the best man......

-Mel

Don't Let Your Ex Mess Up Your Next

2010-06-25T02:33:00.000-07:00

Mmmmm mmmmm...mmmmm... I'm shaking my head right now because I am in a heavy BlackBerry messenger conversation with my big (spiritual) sis. In true fashion of the enemy, I start the day off really excited and optimistic about life and then I get a text from her, "girl, have you seen the video?" I knew in my spirit it was my ex getting engaged. I just KNEW it. She was like, "yep... you want to see it?" I bit the bullet, told her to send the link and I watched it. *pulse racing.... eyes bulging* I watch it, then I'm good. Didn't feel the way I thought. I knew it was coming, just a matter of when.

Rewind about 10 years ago when I first met him where I just knew he would be the one. We dated officially a little more than a year and spent the rest dating others, but "loving" one another. In a true unhealthy fashion of course. We would still be with other people but always found a home in one another. Such a mess. I know. Nothing worst that carrying a torch for a love that has no desire to be lit. Whatever. Long story short, I watch a video today of him proposing to someone else. I had a complete out of body experience I swear I did. It was like I was watching a complete stranger. Like God had removed the intense emotions that I intended to exert. I showed the video to my BFF, mom, and lil sis, everyone was like, "are you ok?" YUP! I'm good. Lol..

My big sis was like, "girl we will pray for him". *record scraaaaaaaaaaaatch" No ma'am, I'm not praying for him. lol. In true big sis fashion, she urged me to be bigger than my emotions, bigger than the years I had thrown in the ring, bigger than the memories, the pain and hurt. Honey, that is a TALL order. Then she said, "don't let your ex mess up your next". #message! There it is. I had to get over that hump (again) and see that God was merely preparing me. (Yet again...)

God wants us to be big enough to let go of the past so we can grab hold on to the newness of the future. How can you carry something if both of your hands are full? How can your heart begin to cultivate new love if you insist on holding on to the old hurt and pain of a past love. The best way for a plant to grow is to cut it. About a month ago, our landscaper cut down 3 of our gorgeous hedges in front of the house. They weren't as green as they could be, but I thought they were fine. I came outside to give the (old) man some water and he was like, "yeah, had to cut your hedges there down." I was like, "Um, I didn't ask you to do that, why did you cut them down so low, they look like pom poms." He said, "oh don't worry about it, it was time. They will be back greener, stronger, and taller." You know I was rolling all types of eyes at him. lol. I was like yeah RIGHT! But honey, I'm a believer. Not only were they back in no time, they were even more beautiful than before.

The message here for you today is: IT'S TIME. It's time to let go and see what the future holds. Like the hedges, the love God has promised you will be greater than before. The love that has been set aside for you will be exactly what you need and desire. The love that you will experience will completely overshadow the past hurts and pains you had. You have to be willing to walk away from it all and start brand new.

As much as it makes me sick to write this, I have to pray that God blesses him in the future. Pray for my strength and transformation. As motivational and spiritual as I can be, THIS has derailed me time and time again. This one thing. I have to let it go and give it up. There is NO other way for me to be blessed. The reason I will get an immediate return on this particular prayer is because God knows the level of humility I had to exhibit. Now the Melissa that everyone knew waaaaaaaaay back when (last week...lol) would be less than sweet and go completely off, BUT since I'm expecting a major breakthrough, I can't afford anymore set backs. I just can't afford to do it. Not at this stage in the game.

So, in efforts to prepare for my next (who I know is reading this), I'm not allowing the past to overshadow my future. I know that the one that is promised for me will far exceed my expectations, but more than anything, be exactly what I need. I can't wait to tell you all the good news. Believe me... it wont be long

Moving from the ex to the next....

-Mel

*cue "On To The Next" by Jay-Z..... lol

Why Can't One Be Enough

2010-06-24T01:30:00.000-07:00

The beautiful thing about marriage is the joy of taking a journey with ONE person that means the world to you. You've waited all your life this person, they are your everything, and you have found a home in them. Right? Well, that is what it was supposed to be, but it seems as though some people are not content with the "good thing" they have been given.

I met a nice guy out a few weeks back. We laughed, kicked it, had a blast. You know I checked that left hand to see a ring, there wasn't one. I was like, "heeeeeeeeeeeey boo..." lol. We stayed at the sports bar until the wee hours of the morning. Talked about everything from politics, religion, money, sports, and marriage. -pause- Marriage. Something in my spirit told me he was married, so I kept insisting that he tell me the truth, and YES, he was. I just about threw up on him. I was like, "if you're married, WHY are you out at a sports bar at 2 am kicking it with a table full of single ladies." He merely says, "Me and my wife have an understanding". Whhhhhhhhhhhhat? An understanding? When was that ever ok? He went on to say that they had an open marriage and that she was "cool" with him doing his thing because she did his. When did they get to the point where seeing other people was ok? When did he/she not become enough?

Those questions sadden me? As a woman dating with purpose, I know that eventually I will be married to my better half and it's scary to think a marriage could evolve to that. At what point does the conversation get stale? When does the fire go out? When does the laughter stop? When does the fun just dissipate? When does the desire dwindle? I mean, really? How is it okay for you to be in the process of asking someone to marry you and you lay on the phone for hours with your first love? I just don't quite comprehend why one would feel comfortable with still carrying a torch for one, while lighting the torch for another.

I guess I could ask 1,000 open ended questions all day and we would end up with a book written. When I took these concerns to my mom and some other married folk, the only response was, "work on you". BAM! #message! lol. That's it. Who cares what is ok in other marriages. You need only be concerned with one, your own. Look at the blueprint for being a wife (and seeking the right one) in the Word. The kind of wife I read about in Proverbs 31 is NOT an easy assignment, but a necessary one. The love that is boasted about in the bible is one that is all inclusive. Don't get me wrong, it's not supposed to be perfect, but purposed filled. Tailored to fit the needs of an individual. That's all I can look to, what MINE is supposed to be like with hopes to be a reflection to others that may need a better representation.

Don't marry for convenience, marry for purpose. Marry for love. Not for the moment. Marry because you can see yourself carrying out your destiny with your mate. Not for what may look good in wedding photos. Marry because you can see your children modeling their marriage after yours. Not because you think it's "time" or "because it's been forever". Don't feel pressured by society, by life, by age, or by circumstances. I have talked to so many younger married couples and they have literally begged and pleaded for me not to rush into marriage. I'm like, "I thought this was the ultimate goal?" And believe me, it is, but you have to make sure it is right.

I could go all day on this topic, you see it's heavy on my mind, but I won't. I have to be concerned with the assignments that I have been given and do the things that I have been called to do. In the meantime, he will be doing the same and then, we will meet somewhere in the middle. I know then, that we will be more than enough for one another. I'm sure of it.

More than enough, and then some.....

-Mel

I've been Hit, But Not Leaving the Ring

2010-06-23T07:20:00.000-07:00

I've been knocked down so many times this year, but I refuse to leave the ring. Leave a job where I was content- POW! At war with inner self- BAM! My love life becomes so tumultuous I should be on a lifetime movie or a Tyler Perry play- POW! Dad Dies......-flat line-... KABOOM! There are other things that only God knows about, but man, this has been a heck of a year. I just refuse to throw in the towel, l refuse to leave the ring. And for that, I am a champion, whether I win every battle or not.

I sat in the bed this morning with tears in my eyes, wondering why God continues to allow me to endure such hardships and trials and why it seemed like there was always a battle. I was like God, "when will the playing field be level? when will the struggle be over? When God?" And I could literally feel God smiling. Like he was saying, "If only you could see what I see in your future. If only you could see what the end is going to be." Every experience that I've triumphed over, I have become stronger. I have become a different person, better than before.

When I was little, I used to try to imagine what it would be like to lose a parent and I would immediately think I would just crumble, that I wouldn't survive it. But you know what, my daddy left such a legacy in me, that I can't cry out of sadness, just out of missing one of my best friends. I know that what he has instilled in me is so great, that even my children will shine with his same light.

You see, when you are built for battle and equipped for victory, nothing or no one can get in the way. Not even yourself. Even when I get in the way of who I'm supposed to be, God quickly does some rearranging. I sit back like, "how did I get here? where do I go from here? God what are you saying." And within moments, I am made whole. It's amazing.

Even with tears in my eyes right now, I am overjoyed at things to come. I woke up this morning with such a spirit of expectancy, even with all that I have experienced over these past few weeks and there was a knock at the door. Fed Ex delivered a package from a new friend. In this package was the most beautiful painting I have seen. He wanted to send a thank you for merely being a blessing to his life. All I could do was look up to the heavens and give God a high 5.

When you allow yourself to see yourself already out of a situation, you will gradually transition from the one that you are in. Plllllllllllllllease believe me that is easier said than done. I am definitely a witness to that. This year has literally been a blurr. I go to sleep in prayer and wake up in it. Praying for a breakthrough and hoping for something different. The truth is, if you stay in a state of constant expectation, you will see that your prayers are being answered in small ways daily. You need only hold on to what God has told you.

As I stay in this "ring" called life and fight this good fight, I know that I am already victorious regardless of what the score is looking like. I am merely in awe of what God is doing with my life. And this is only the beginning.

Staying in the ring and expecting more.....

-Mel

Trust Me, He's a Better Man With Me

2010-06-22T07:34:00.000-07:00

Sometimes we have to acknowledge that our ex's are different and maybe even be better with someone else. This is a sensitive subject for a lot of women, me included. Recently, my coward of an ex sent me the text, "I'm Engaged". And my whole world froze........ PAUSE.........

Why? Why would I care? Why would I hesitate? Why would I have an immediate attitude? Because I prepared him to be the man he is today? Or because I gave him a better part of my young adult heart? Or that she now has a better version of who he was? Yes, all of the above. But most imporantly, I didn't really want him like that anymore. I prayed and cried about that man so many times that God's phone went on mute as soon as He heard me utter his name. lol.

The sad thing is that we don't know how to let go and acknowledge that sometimes we are better with someone else. For instance, a man I met recently immediately saw the greatness in me and was asking my ring size, but he was recently in a long term relationship where he was contstantly arguing and not getting any closer to his purpose in life. Or in other relationships where one person drinks and the other is a little more of a casual drinker. The other person acts as a barometer for the one that is a party animal. They merely help mello them out. That same party animal can find a fellow party animal and operate in a chaotic relationship that is so far from what God wants from them. Sometimes different is a good thing.

You see, I know I am a stronger woman for this next man and I know how I need to be loved. My ex obviously didnt have the desire to do that. Notice I said desire, not ability. We each have the ability to be who we need to be for who we need to be it for. It's all about desire. When you want someone or something bad enough, you will do what needs to be done to make it work.

As I get closer to being with "him", I know what I want, what I need, and what I need to do. It's funny how I think about the woman I was with each of the men in my past and it's amazing how I've evoloved each time. In some of my memories, I don't even recognize myself. I was so far from purpose that I looked crazy... lol.. Thank God for mercy and grace. Surely they have followed me all the days of my life.

So, in preparing for a future with someone, let go who you once were and who you once were with. They were built to make someone better just as you were built to make someone else better. In life, it's all about growth. Become better and expect better. Believe me, it makes all the difference.

Moving farther from memories of him, closer to visions of me.....

-Mel

When A Man is Ready....

2010-06-21T06:45:00.000-07:00

Lately I've been running into some really great catches. Men with great careers, great level of intellect, 401ks & savings, sharp dress codes, handsome faces, and a love for God that is undeniable. They all keep asking me, where are all the good women? That's baffling to me. All reports say that it's a 20:1 ratio for women to men (that may be a little exaggerated, forgive me). That can't be possible right? Maybe not.

When a man knows what he wants, he just knows. He's not willing to compromise, budge, or take anything less. The crazy thing is, they spend a substantial amount of time with one woman and after a while decide that she simply is "not the one". But they can turn around and meet a random woman and fall in love instantly. It's like they just know.

In the past few months I've made it my personal quest to pick the minds of great men. What they want, what they need, what their futures look like to them. All of them say the same thing, "they want the right woman at their side." Most of my guy friends may or may not come from a home with a father in it, but they ALL have come from a home with a mother in it. They have witnessed what a real woman should look like and they know what she should encompass. While they are not looking for a carbon copy of their mother, they all want their woman to have many of her same qualities.

As many women who are itching to be married, not all of them are taking the time to adequately prepare to become one. It's like they are so consumed with the ring, the ceremony, and the title, they neglect all the foundational elements. All of my girlfriends can cook, clean, iron, pray like elders in the church, know how to "put it down" behind closed doors, and know how to submit biblically. Then I meet other women and strike up casual conversations about life and the future. These other women rarely cook, go to church to just meet men, and drink like fish. They always end up saying, "Girl, I met a really nice guy, he's trying to wife me, but I am not going to slow down to fit his lame standards." Huh? Isn't that crazy?

It's funny, when a man is ready to settle down, it's a WRAP! Their whole lives begin to revolve around finding the right woman and doing it like they do in those old black and white movies. Sad thing is, they end up falling for women who on the surface want to be a wife, but internally want to be the quintessential single girl with a diamond ring. That just isn't going to work.

A man that is ready is READY! He's willing to go the extra mile. He's willing to do things that he ordinarily wouldn't do when he was casually dating. He wants everything he does in dating to prepare him for marriage. He tailors his whole lifestyle to reflect that of a man that is preparing for a family and a lifelong union.

As women, we must begin to act as though this man is on his way. Whether we are dating someone seriously or not, we need to behave as someone's "good thing". We can pray until our knees bleed, but if we do not begin to walk into the steps of a virtuous woman, we cannot be mad if this man has not found us. Trust me, there is a breed of men out there that know what they want and it might just be in you. If you are busy doing what God has asked of you, your man might just be in the wings watching you.

Every move you make today should be towards the woman that you aspire to be.

Walking upright in virtuous steps.....

- Mel

Tribute to Big Poppa

2010-06-20T07:09:00.000-07:00

(I can't really write this post without falling out on the ground, so bear with me. )

I wanted to take a moment to say I miss my daddy. Not for all the reasons that people may think. Well, maybe so. Yes I miss him being my prayer partner, my Dave Chappel/ Paul Mooney partner, my Tiny & Toya watcher, my late night riding homie, my fried fish confidant, my voice of reason, my laughing partner, my smoothie partner, my tennis/basketball/gym/walk around the neighborhood partner, my man of God. I think what I miss the most is his spirit to press forward. His spirit of holding on. His spirit to see the good in people. His ability to see straight through to the heart of a man.

I miss that so much as I get closer to becoming someone's wife. Someone's virtuous woman. Someone's "good thang". Someone's mother. As I become all that God has destined me to be. I just wish he could of seen where I am. Even in the past 4 months, I have become someone totally different. Nowhere near the same. The strength that I possess, I don't even know where it came from (well, I know it's from God). The ability I have now to see things that are to come, I wish I could talk to him about. I just wish I could say 2 or 3 more things to him. Ask him a few more questions. Have like one more deep conversation and walk away with a wealth of knowledge.

I will never understand God's timing, His reasoning, His way of thinking, I can only ask for a way to press forward. I pray that I someday am thought of as much as daddy is.

I look back over the 27 years I had with him and I can do nothing but cry. Tears of laughter, memories, prayers, and breakthroughs. I have had some great times with dad. He confided in me like I was one of his homies. To never have him again feels like I've lost an organ. I miss him more than words can ever encompass. I pray that God heals this pain and allows me to still be a blessing to others.

It's crazy, as soon as dad passed, I received a tsunami of proposals and interest from men that I have never imagined. I pray daily for dad to send some sort of sign that he has approved the man I decide to settle down with. I think that's the biggest thing right now. Not ever having him walk me down the aisle or helping me write my vows. Goodness, I just have to pray now for the strength.

Through my veil of tears, I see daddy smiling and saying, "I'm proud of you baby girl, go out there and kill 'em".

And that's the plan... to do it just like he was standing right behind me cheering me on, instead he's above.

Pray for me y'all. Today is going to be rough. ( Yup, my face is covered in tears)

-Mitch's Girl

Just Go With It (Part 2)

2010-06-19T09:48:00.000-07:00

Yeah, I've been ghost, so you know I have A LOT to say.... So recently I 've been in one of those "gray area" type of relationships where you're more than friends, but less than together. Its been great, but difficult because there is so much left out in the open, so many things that you really have no right to question, and areas that I don't particularly want to be open about. But, let me tell you the power of putting it ALL on the table.

Recently I was at my little sister's high school event and there were a few fraternity (that shall remain nameless..lol) members there that were cool. Of course the one that wants to be a pastor found his way to me and asked me out. I'm like, "Um, I'm kinda sorta seeing someone, sorry." He was like, "Is that your man? Are you all exclusive? Is he the one?" I really didn't even know how to answer that. I was like, you're right, dinner won't hurt. So we went out, he was cool, no big deal. On the ride home, I HAD to call the boo. I just could not act like it was all good and not tell him. Man, I called him to tell him everything and he was real cool about it. He was like, "Babe, I know you're loyal, it's cool. Do your thing." He even revealed his mindset on our whole situation.

You see, the moment I decided to "just go with it", things just even themselves out. Facing the music wasn't as bad as it seemed. I actually felt more liberated by the truth than by hiding it and running from the inevitable. Many times we allow the enemy to place things in our minds to distract us, to cast doubt, and to create internal confusion. It is all by design. The less stable we are, the less effective we are. It can start as something as small as second guessing yourself to doubting who you are to completely not knowing how to make the right decisions all together.

Don't let small things fester in your mind and take your eyes off set forth course....

Figuring out this course & staying on it....

-Mel

Just Go With It (Part 1)

2010-06-19T09:23:00.000-07:00

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know I'm back on that "ghost mode" again, but let me tell you, LIFE HAS BEEN CRAZY!!! Last time we talked, my dad had just passed and my life was in a full tornado. I can't even begin to explain the myriad of emotions I've been battling daily. It's been so overwhelming.

I have come to tell you that God is STILL in the blessing business, despite what things make look like around. It is not easy to get back up and dust yourself off, but there is great reward in doing so. I don't even know where to begin. Well, right before dad died, he transferred his favor & anointing on me in a double portion. I didn't understand its purpose until now. My life as of now has been a direct reflection of God's favor and all that daddy possessed when he was here.

Recently, a good girlfriend of mine called to ask me if I was taking any PR/Marketing clients. I was like, "Yeah, I guess, I really need something in my life right now." So, from that very moment, my life has been in fast forward. I was thinking this was some random person who needed a little help with a campaign, but turns out it was the TOP revenue generator for Ardyss International (The Body Magic producers). She just so happened to be one of the premiere platinum presidents that is running it! From that one phone call, I accepted the contract and immediately began traveling around the country. She asked me what I was making with my old job and said, " Honey I can match that any day and I am going to make you a very rich woman." I immediately began crying out to the Lord. It's amazing how God can elevate you when you merely elevate your level of thinking and expectation. Wait, it gets better. Not only was she willing to match my salary, but she asked if I had time for TWO more clients that are willing to pay the same. GO JESUS!!!!! Honey, you know they had to carry me out of this lady's office... lol.

I ended up meeting with the second client and discussed what he needed done. I went back to my room, prayed on it, and then within 30 minutes, I had completely revamped his program. I emailed it to him and he hit the FAN! He said I was the missing link that God sent to him. I was able to assemble a marketing design team here in Atlanta and bring his entire campaign to life in the matter of 3-4 days. Not only that, the campaign has already had 2,000 people sign up for it and his revenue has almost tripled. Man, this is amazing.

I say all of this to say that God is MORE than able to do all you can ever ask or think. But you have to ASK the right things while you THINK the right things. You have to believe that there is a way out. You have to understand that God is more than able. You have to understand that if God did it once, He is well equipped to handle it this time.

One of my (new) favorite scriptures has been revealed to me recently, it says in Psalms 84:11, that "For the Lord God is a sun and shield; The LORD gives grace and glory; No good thing does He withhold from those who walk uprightly." The only part of this equation that is required of you is that you walk upright. Meaning keep living in God's will, do what is asked of you, and the rest shall be given unto you. It's all a matter of time.

Keep holding on and believing. God can do it. I'm a living witness! In spite of all I've been through, I've kept pressing and it has made all the difference.

I'm humbled ....

-Mel

Get It Right the 1st Time....

2010-04-13T09:48:00.000-07:00

Have you ever heard the same thing, from a million different sources? Like, you're up one morning watching TV and you see a commercial for cutting your hair and you're like, "Honey, my hair looks fine, I'm not cutting my hair." Then you go to church and the message is about "cutting things loose in order to grow." Then your momma asks you, "Girl, when are you going to cut your hair." And theeeeeeeeeen, you get to the hair dresser and she says to you," Ms. Thang, we are gonna have to cut your hair, whether you want to or not." lol.

That's like with God. He gives us multiple signs that something should be done in certain areas in our lives and we many times ignore it or put it off. At the final point, we have no choice but to change. I used the hair example as something simple and humorous, but God approaches us the same way with things more serious such as leaving a job, changing the nature of our relationships (with friends or significant others), the places we frequent, even down to the way we spend our money. The thing about God is, He meets us right where we are, but it's all a learning process.

Don't let God show you the same things over and over. Each time, the message will intensify and you will lose more and more power to submit. You will soon have no choice but to get it right. You must began to see what God is revealing to you the first time. Without having to suffer the repercussions of disobedience.

In life, we often times know what's good for us and what we shouldn't be doing, but we do it anyway. It is in this time that we hear God's voice and disregard it. It is in this time that we are most susceptible to reproach. God is not a God of punishment, but of learning. He not only wants us to learn from our mistakes or missteps, but to reach out and share our stories with others. It's funny how even in our wrongdoings, God still has us covered. He still watches over us. He still grants us grace. He still loves us.

In efforts not to lose valuable moments with God, get it right the first time. It will add days to your life and jewels in your crown. It will just make things flow so much easier. Your breakthrough is actually closer in reach when you do things according to his will and his instruction.

Living in direction.....

Mel

Gone too soon.... On whose watch?

2010-04-12T09:27:00.000-07:00

Disclaimer: Yeah, I know I am on this death/life talk a lot, but this is what happens when someone so critical to you leaves the earth. This is my way of healing, and plus, it's my blog, I can write about what I want.... so anyhoo, here is it...

I was talking to some of dad's friends the other day and they are still so very broke up. Saying daddy was "gone too soon", that he didn't deserve to die, and that they didn't know how they were going to be able to move on without him. I was like, "That was MY daddy, and I'm not saying any of those things, why are yall so broken?" So many things came to mind during these conversations. Did daddy get a glimpse of heaven and decide not to come back? Did he talk to God prior? Did he want to leave earth for paradise? Did he know?

All these questions have been answered through dreams, conversations with God and reading the word. You see, we are so caught up with our earthly assignments that we forget that we are merely on loan from heaven. Our eternal destinations. While we are all puzzled about the timing of dad's earthly departure, his expiration date had come up. It was merely his time to go back to his maker. It is the craziest thing, but its the only solace that I find in daddy being gone. He gets to go to a place that we can merely dream of. Imagine a place you envision as paradise times 1 million? Wouldn't that be incredible? Well, I think daddy saw that and threw up the "deuces" to us earthly folk.

I have been in a state of worship lately and in that time, I can literally feel the presence of my father. In the midst of my hands lifted up, I can feel,smell, and almost reach out and touch my dad. Yeah, it sounds weird, but its true. That's how I know he made it in. In the midst of praising God, I can feel my dad's spirit, which is what he exists as now. "To be absent from the body is to be in the presence of the Lord. " I used to hear people say that all the time, but honey, it' s real. God is so good. I can only imagine the great work daddy is doing up there. God must have some MAJOR stuff going up there he had to call home one of his generals to take up a new mantle.

That is why I can't be totally mad about him leaving to go be with God. My timing and God's timing are totally different. Where I watch the clock, God makes the clock tick. While I am flipping through a calendar, God allows the days and months to come and go. To gain understanding of why people leave earth too soon is really a way for God to urge us to get closer to him. In seeking answers, we merely need to seek his face.

The reason I cry is because I will forever miss the presence of my daddy. I can't hide that fact or that pain. But I know, in God's timing, will come healing and understanding. In the meantime, I will continue to press forward and be the woman I was ordained and set aside to be.

I miss you daddy, but I know you are in heaven sending some "hook-ups" my way.

In love and understanding,

Mel

My Father's Business

2010-04-11T08:56:00.001-07:00

So, these past few weeks have been tough to say the least, but time has revealed that there is a great work that needs to be done in the earth. I have had the opportunity to have my dad the longest out of all his daughters and I have truly been blessed as a result. In my 27 years, I have witnessed my father dream without measure. He would think of something and immediately be able to execute it. Above all his dreams, talents, projects, and ventures, he just wanted to be remembered. To be celebrated. It came to me as I was going through all of his tapes, his jerseys, his designs on his computer, and all of his stuff he left behind. Goodness. How will I be able to carry his legacy on? How can I assure that the world never forgets my daddy? It is so much. God began to speak and this is what He said..... "He may be gone in body, but he left some great works to be done in the earth and YOU have to do them."

-pause-

"Me.... God, you can't be for real. I can't do all the things THE Michael Mitchell did. He was a genius."...

I could literally hear God laughing out loud, weirdest thing. You see, so many times we get caught up in the abilities and success of a person, without giving true regard to the person who gave them the ability to do all these things. I kept hearing Philippians 4:13 resonate throughout my mind, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me". Every time I looked at one of dad's many inventions or innovations, I was in awe. All the things he was able to accomplish was simply a result of having an intimate relationship with God. Not because he went to Harvard, not because he trained at Julliard, not because he went to MIT, but because he took the time to be before the Lord.

You see, as we are afforded a new mornings daily, and God's mercies are renewed, we should make it our business to give God the glory and ask for ALL that we need. Whether it be a parking space at the mall, to a cancer diagnosis being turned around, to getting approval on a new house or scholarship, or even the finances to survive during a so-called recession. God can do all things because he's BEEN doing all things. God is not a man that He should lie. ( And Lord knows there are a bunch of lying men... that's another post... lol)

Tomorrow will make 1 full month since my father went home to the ultimate paradise. Where there is no pain, no lies, no guilt, no disappointment. Where my grandmother and my great grandparents are, his best friends that left too soon, and even people that he dreamed to one day meet. Man, one full month without Michael Mitchell on the earth. You couldn't have told me on January 1, 2010, that I would only have 3 months to soak up all the daddy I could. I would of told you that you were a bold face lie. lol. But it seems as though daddy knew. 2 weeks before his stroke, he transferred his anointing to me ....DOUBLE. It was so random that it took me off guard. He rubbed both of my hands and prayed over me. He kept stressing to me the importance of time and precious moments. He gave me all of his passwords, names of his best friends, favorite songs, and how to run all of his businesses. Yea, he knew.

So, in these next critical days in my life, I must continue to carry on my father's business. His business of changing lives, loving God's children, being creative & innovative, making "out of the box" jersey & t-shirt designs, and doing the works of the Lord. My dad has prepared me to be heir to his throne as a baby. He sowed countless hours in prayer and special moments in me so I could spiritually move forward with all that he has left behind. I will now: act as President of his companies, be my mother's full time backbone, be a great parental support to my little sisters, and definitely step up my intimate relationship with God.

For you see, it's not all about the earthly education and training that prepares you for your destiny, but instead, it comes from being set aside and spending countless hours before the Lord in prayer and praise. At 27, I will be able to stand amongst giants in the body because I know that is who my father prayed for me to be.

Fast forward 1 year from now, who knows what God would have done. As I continue to carry out my father's business by doing the heavenly Father's business, I know that I am walking in purpose....

In steadfast prayer,

Mel

You Can't Take It All With You: Rest in Piece...

2010-03-28T08:12:00.000-07:00

Well, it seems as if I am getting more and more revelations as I sleep. Honestly, I think its my dad working in cohorts with God. Those two are NOT letting me sleep... lol. Guess that's a good thing, I have an insider's tip on life now more than ever.

As I was laying partially awake, I kept hearing "rest in peace". I was like, yeah, rest in peace daddy. Then I heard, "no, not PEACE, but PIECE". Rest in PIECE. -pause- Piece. Let me reveal what God has told me....

Our lives rest upon the legacy that we choose to leave in the earth. Whether we are allotted the seventy plus seven years God promised, or if God decides to call us home a little earlier. We have to maximize the time we've been given. When God began to reveal to me "rest in piece", he told me that we are only to leave a "piece" of ourselves to be placed in the ground, the rest should be left throughout the world, the people we meet, the projects we complete, and the works we've done.

In 1 Timothy 4:14 it says, "Do not neglect your gift which was given you through a prophetic message when the body of elders laid hands on you." Now that gift (or gifts) that has been placed in you is for all of those around you. God has given a portion that is to bless others. What's the use of possessing an angelic voice if all you do is sing in the shower. Should you not sing in a choir? Visit nursing homes & hospitals to sing? To write music to change lives? You see, when you have a specific gift, there is a specific need for the Kingdom that only YOU can meet.

I look back on my father's life and marvel at all he was able to accomplish, all the people he was able to meet, and all the dreams he was able to live out. It's amazing. He was able to reach the drug addict on the corner, all the way to the rich man's widow. There wasn't a soul he didn't feel he couldn't reach. He was able to write over 500 songs, create jerseys the world has never seen, and see things in the spirit that only God could reveal. It was because he chose to not bury his talents in the ground. He chose to surrender. Totally. He knew that when the March 12, 2010 (his death) of his life would come, he would hear job well done my son.

Dad did not use the excuses of having a non-existent father, being the product of a single mother struggling, being mistreated or misunderstood, or even feeling lonely. He knew that all his brain possessed, the world needed. He knew that when his trumpet was sounded to come back home, God would have done a complete work in him.

Two weeks before my dad suffered his massive stroke, he pulled me to the side and said he wanted to pray for me. I was like, "Dad, I'm headed to a photoshoot, what's up." He kept saying, "we don't have a lot of time baby girl, I need to impart some things to you." As we sat at the breakfast table, I saw something behind his eyes, the earthly life he lived was coming to an end. At that moment, I didn't know what I was beginning to witness, but God was increasing his spiritual man, while decreasing his earthly man. Dad did something strange, he said, "I want to anoint you before you leave. I want to decree and declare a double portion of my anointing. All that God has given me spiritually, I want you to have double that." I was at a loss for words. I didn't understand it, but now I do. Dad knew. In that very moment, he knew that his clock was ticking and it was only a matter of time before he would go home to be with his heavenly Father. He knew he couldn't take that anointing to the ground with him, it would be of no use. He knew more souls needed to be saved. He knew more music needed to be made. He knew more jerseys needed to be designed. He knew more speeches needed to be given. He knew.

You see, when we all close our eyes and rest in "piece" we don't need to take anything with us. None of our ideas, our innovations, our songs, our business plans, our anointing, and our giftings. There are things that God has placed in us that are meant for earth. These things are meant to bless people and bring them to the kingdom. It is not a coincidence that Dad was able to impart his anointing on me in his final days. It is no coincidence that you are reading this right now. God is a God of RIGHT NOW! He wants us to make a change right now and he wants us to begin to live right now. No longer is it ok to sit on our talents, ideas, and giftings anymore. We must make use of them right now.

When you lay down each night and ask for forgiveness of your sins, ask Him what you are to leave in the earth. Ask God to show you what He saw you doing. Begin to envision yourself changing lives one person at a time. Make it your business to be a blessing to someone, from a baby in the nursery, to a mega millionaire, to a difficult client, to a loved one that you have been estranged from, or even your boss that you know doesn't care for you much. You will be amazed at what power love possesses. Leave pieces of you all along the way, so when you rest in peace, you are merely resting in "piece", because your spirit will resonate all throughout the world.

I leave you with this quote:

"Hide not your talents, they for use were made. What's a sun-dial in the shade?"

- Benjamin Franklin

Living in peace by leaving pieces all along the way...

-Mel

Rest in Peace Big Poppa: Daddy Died So That I May Live

2010-03-27T15:53:00.000-07:00

Well, I guess everyone has been wondering where I have been and what's been up. Well, long story short, my father passed on March 12, 2010 at 3:42 pm. My life has been changed forever. I lost my best friend, my teacher, my pastor, my prayer partner, and my daddy. Forever. Words cannot express the amount of emotions that I have experienced during this time. From sadness to despair to depression to frustration and even anger. I've asked God 1,000 times why. I even asked dad why. No answer came. All I can do is keep living.

So, dad's death has taught me 3 things.....

- Reflect

- Move Forward

- To live....

Journey with me for a moment.

In reflecting, Ive realized so many things: What I once had and what I know how to do. What Ive learned. What Ive remembered. What I now possess. What I must perfect.

I now look back on all my dad has taught me and realize that Ive somehow captured it all. I can vividly remember the talks we've had, the late night drives we've taken and the lessons he has taught me. In remembering who my dad was, I know who I must become. Attending his memorial services, hearing what people had to say about him, and reading all that was written, I was in the presence of greatness for 27 years. For that, I praise the most High. I am eternally grateful.

As I look back over my own life, I have reevaluated what I spend time on and with who. As we race against this clock called life, we cannot spend precious moments on trivial people and things. We must make conscious decisions to be who God has called us to be. No longer is it ok to waste time on things that don't bring us closer to our destiny and to God. When your number is called, what do you want to be caught doing? Reflect on that.

Funny how it takes death for us to live......

Secondly, I've learned that you must move on... From people, things, hurts, pains, places of confusion, all of that. Time is not given to be wasted. I look back on what is considered to be Daddy's last days and all I can remember him saying is, "Baby girl, don't let those people rent space in your head, you're too valuable to the kingdom for that." That makes so much sense. Many times our breakthroughs come from letting go. How can God fill our hands with anything new when we are still holding on to the old stuff?

Death hasn't served as an epihpany for me, but merely as a reminder.........

We can't keep expecting a breakthrough when we refuse to let things go. Since about January, my dad would pick up the phone and call random people in his phone book. He would call them to encourage them, speak into their lives, pray with them, and get things right. The moment he did that, his speaking calendar began to fill up, people began to sow into his life, he began to feel better than he had in years. All because he chose to surrender to God's will and bless others. Letting things go gave him freedom. Gave him life. I'm trying to do the same. Trying.

Just because I want to transform, doesn't mean it will happen over night. Change is a process that I must actively pursue and participate in.

I look at the people that did daddy wrong. (I've even confronted a few... so what... lol). Lied to him. Mistreated him. Gave him broken promises. You name it. And I have to manage to let it all go. The funeral was my true test. I think I probably got a B-. I'm still a work in progress. I have to let it go. I know, I know. For daddy's sake and for my own breakthrough. I have to be honest, this is tough. Somewhere along the way, I have to leave it right there along the way. Just not worth carrying. The weight of carrying on a legacy is far more than enough on its own. So I must keep moving. You only add value to a negative person/situation/memory by holding on to it. It's almost like they won if you do. But if you release it, guess what? You WIN!

Lastly, daddy died so that we, his girls, could live. He showed us that within the years you've been given, you have to end each day on zero. Which means you've given 1000% to the day. No matter what was thrown dad's way, he always gave God the glory. He knew that at the end of the day, God would have the final say. Dad found a way to make every experience a teaching point. He believed what you didn't have in money/influence, God would double in favor. And he lived his life that way every day. He didn't just talk about being saved, he WAS saved. He did it. He didn't just teach us how to make a marriage work, he showed us. He didn't just teach us how to live out our dreams, he showed us by doing it himself. You see, dad lived to the point where each day had its own story. He showed us what living was. So even in his death, he's forcing us to live. When you get a glimpse of that invisible clock on the wall and you begin to hear the faint "tick-tock", you know that this thing called life is no longer game. At least not a game that you should plan on losing.

I think, all in all, I will never, ever forget my very best friend. My daddy. All that's he's taught me, all that he's shown me, all the prayers he's prayed over me, the dreams he had for me, his encouraging smile, and his legacy that I must press forward to carry. Most of all, I will cherish all that he has taught me just by living. Even the last day I talked to him he asked me if I had enough faith to believe God for a massive miracle. I said yes, and he told me that it's already been done, God was just waiting on me. That was the last time we would ever speak. On February 26, 2010 at 2:38 pm, my dad suffered a major stroke, and was never the Michael Anthony Mitchell I knew. He came back for a moment at the hospital, looked in my eyes, and I saw his spirit go back towards the heavens. Right then I knew that was it. My daddy had handed over his mantle and it was time to be a big girl. I will never be the same. Man **pause** I am still living as if I will wake up and my life would be different. That daddy would still be here. Im in total disbelief that I won't hear my name being hollered across the house. Or that I will never get an encouraging text from him. Or that I will never get a huge bear hug. Or that I won't have my best friend to walk me down the aisle. Wheeew, I just can't believe it.

But, reality is what it is and daddy would want me to rise up like a Spartan and continue carrying on the legacy he's already made. my mantle feels heavy, but he knew I would be able to carry it. Now I have two fathers looking down on me.

Lights! Camera! Action! Time to truly live, because daddy died. Time to do the things he has instructed and the things he desired to do. All I can do is live.....

-Mel

Time is of the essence.....

2010-03-07T16:08:00.000-08:00

Well, I have definitely been a little ghost lately, I know... but so much going on. Last Friday, my life changed forever. My father had a MAJOR stroke. Like, major. We were at the house drinking smoothies and 30 minutes later, I got a call from him, breathing heavy and my heart dropped. I had to call 911 remotely and get them to the house. They had to break in through the basement to rush him to the hospital. According to doctors, he shouldn't have survived from the house, but he did. I found the pajamas he had on and the pressure reading from the paramedics. It said his pressure was 192/136! Lord, that was beyond the level of survival. But he did.

The miracles that we have seen are far beyond our belief and understanding. The doctors thought he would have little to no movement and let me tell you about MY DADDY, he was moving upon command and trying to focus with his eyes. On Saturday, it just did not look good. We stayed at the hospital through the night believing God, praying, crying, and holding things together. One of the local pastors came and prayed over him. His frat brothers came from all over. Some of the church members that had relocated to Atlanta came too. I mean, we felt like we were in the final hours. As the doctors were delivering bad news after bad news, I began to cry. Then I left the room and went to the chapel with my little sisters to pray. I prayed like I was certified world travelling evangelist. I prayed so hard that people were peeking through the chapel windows to see what was going on. When I left out of there, I was so strengthened. I heard God's voice just as clear, "Go sing to your father, he will come back to you".

Let me tell you, my sisters and I went in that room and began to sing "breakthrough" to him over and over and felt the presence of the Holy Ghost fill the room. It was to the point where all of dad's close friends were in tears. They were so touched by that moment that they had to leave the room to compose themselves. We knew we had to go before the throne with a boldness and a confidence like never before, and we did. On Sunday morning, we got an early morning call that daddy had opened his eyes and was responding to command. Lord, we rushed to the hospital immediately. Dad was coming back. All because we weren't giving up on him.

When I asked if he missed us he began to cry. When I played Kanye West, he tried to tap his left foot. So, we know that God is more than able. Monday night, all the visitors had begun to go home and it was just mom and the girls (me and my lil sisters & god mom). So, I said, "Mom, I think we need to corporately pray for dad." She agreed. I went to a corner in the hospital and began to go before the Lord in fervent prayer. When I came out from beyond the veil, I immediately when in the room with daddy and began to pray for him. His eyes began to flutter. I ran out and got the rest of the crew and we began to pray like never before. My mom anointed each one of our hands with oil and then we all laid hands on a different part of his body and prayed silently. My mom (who is also a dynamic woman of God and pastor) began to pray and command the angels to lift him up. As she was commanding him to rise, my father's ENTIRE body began to lift up. The force of his body bucking knocked each one of us against the walls around us. It was something out of a movie. The nurses came running in to see what actually was going on. They said what was going on with him was simply beyond medicine.

I am sitting in the hospital waiting room now, still holding on to what God showed me and promised. I will be keeping you all updated periodically if I am up to writing. Just been so exhausted from this whole experience, but trusting God for the strength.

-Mel

Good People... Good Living...

2010-02-22T16:28:00.000-08:00

I just wanted to take a moment to reflect on how blessed I am for the people in my life. From my parents, my little sisters, my BFFs, my "boo", my new found friends, and even down to the industry folks that I've become acquainted with. God has truly placed some wonderful people in my path that are getting me closer to who I am truly supposed to be.

I look back on my childhood and how my parents have molded me to who I have become by keeping me saturated in the Word, surrounded by positive people, and giving me an example of what marriage should fundamentally be about. While life has never been perfect, it has been perfectly suited for me. For who I was to become. God doesn't make mistakes, nor does He allow things that you cannot handle. I just wanted to take a moment to thank Him for the best parents for me. I don't think I would fit in anywhere else. lol..

My little sisters have motivated me to be the best I can be. And when I felt like I wasn't, they always reminded me that I was their hero and could do no wrong. That has meant the world to me.

My BFFs have inspired me through their victories and trials. Its so crazy how I'm not the "girlfriend" type, where I'm not interested in having a whole bunch of friends, but have ended up with some true ride or die chicks as my "girls". God has even used them to get messages to me that I refused to receive from anywhere else. Crazy how God connects you to people.

Ahhhhhh... *pause* the boo.... another reason why I've been kinda, sorta ghost. lol. He's the best. And of course not in Atlanta :O( Not to tell ALL my business. I know he's heaven sent. Everything I thought I couldn't find, he is. Everything I wanted to hear, he says. Everything I think I'm not, he knows I am. It's so amazing.... this man... I don't know if he's my forever or my right now, but there is simply no other place I'd rather be, than in this very moment. (ok, let me stop before I tell all my lil business)

Even down to my new friends, people from college that I'm cool with now, and business associates. I am so grateful for their roles in my life. The laughter, the memories, the game nites, the random road trips, the special events, the list goes on.

I'm saying all this to say that we must surround ourselves with like minded people and like purpose people. As I look back over my life, more time was spent with people that took me away from my purpose than those that pushed me closer to it. As I continuously did spring cleaning, I realized the hand full of folks left in my life were all I needed and as life progressed, God placed new people in my life.

It's like making your acceptance speech for an Oscar and looking out in the audience and seeing the only people that matter, the ones who have help mold you, the ones that have pushed you towards your intended goal, the ones that loved you through all your ups and downs. I'm having one of those moments now. I am SO grateful for all the people in my life, that I merely tear up at the thought of any one of them.

Never miss an opportunity to tell those in your life that you love them and that you appreciate them. Be grateful for those in your life and continuously sow into their lives. Make an effort to call them often just to say, "hey". Trust me, it makes all the difference in the world.

Ok, that's all ... I am so full right now...

~Mel

Get out there and live.....

2010-02-22T16:12:00.000-08:00

So, yes, I have been a little ghost lately. I know, I know... the boo called me last night and totally told me I need to get it together. (nothing like a man that motivates you.. honey, that's another post.. lol). But, anyway, I have been LIVING, do you hear me? When 2010 hit, I told my mom I believe God was about to have me traveling a great deal so I needed some new luggage. Thinking nothing of it, I was living life as usual, by going to Target. lol. I walk in, and all the luggage I could ever need was dirt cheap. Well, that was only the beginning. In a previous post I told you about the money that came in the mail right? Well, the very next day, I got a call about going to Mardi Gras. And you know I went! Had the time of my life.

I say all of that to say that you can't expect life to wait on you, you have to get MOVING. Start living NOW, and the rest will come together. Place what you want in the atmosphere and watch it start coming to you. Start believing against all doubts that this is indeed your season and watch the doors that will start opening. Start seeing yourself in the places you want to be and watch trips open up with your name on them.

So, speaking of trips. While I was in New Orleans having a sober good time, I got 3 calls for 3 more trips. One to Essence, one to Vegas, and one to New York. And guess what? I'm going to all 3. I tell you, God is something else. I am not going to ponder how they will all come together or whether I should go, I am going to continue to watch God put all these puzzle pieces together. I merely placed the word "travel" into the atmosphere and it began to activate so much in my life. I am so grateful .

Last year this time, I was trying to figure out what God wanted me to do, where He wanted me to go and questioning my place in life. The moment I let go all of those questions, doubts, and fears, the floodgates of heaven began to open up. In the meantime, I have been sowing into the life of others. Whether it be love, my time, a listening ear, money, or even just a smile. I have allowed God to use me and He has begun to reward me tremendously. And it's only the beginning.

I urge you today to take down your guard and inner prohibitions and began to dream. Regardless of money, time, and the people involved. God will put all that together. Just put what you want "out there" and watch them begin to come to pass. I am certainly seeing God move mightily....

~Mel

If the birds are cool, so am I .....

2010-02-10T00:51:00.000-08:00

Matthew 6:25

For this reason I say to you, do not be worried about your life,

as to what you will eat or what you will drink; nor for your body,

as to what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing?

"Look at the birds of the air, that they do not sow, nor reap nor gather into barns,

and yet your heavenly Father feeds them.

Are you not worth much more than they?

And who of you by being worried can add a single hour to to his life?

This happens to be one of my favorite scriptures. Well, one of hundreds. lol. But really. Read it again. It makes so much sense. It's like God is saying, "Snap out of it! I got this!" And truth to the matter He does.

So many times, we find ourselves wrecking our brains over financial solutions, a job, our bills, what you are going to eat, where we are going to live, and the list goes on. Going back to the Lord's word, He has commanded us to NOT worry. Go back to the scripture, "Look at the birds". I actually did that one day. They live their lives so carefree. Now, indeed we cannot not equate a bird's life to that of a human,but in perspective to surviving and living day to day by faith, we surely can.

If God can take care of a bird, can He not do that for you? Did God not grant us dominion over all animals and things in His kingdom? So if a bird is "straight" (ok), why wouldn't His good and faithful servant be?

God allows us to go through life relying upon Him and trusting him in every aspect and that is by design. He wants us to know that no matter what need we have, we have already been provided for. He says it plain, "worrying cannot add a single hour to our life", we only lose those moments. Time is such a precious commodity these days that we dare not value each one.

I look at my own life and Im amazed at the moments when I took my hands off the wheel and let God have total control. I got to my intended destination almost immediately. Man, the God we serve is something else. We get so caught up in the way we want things done and the methods we're accustomed to that we dont see how he's working it out and sometimes its already done.

At this point in my life, I have not only gotten from behind the wheel, I have moved to the very

back seat of the car of my life. I have let God have the whole front of the car.. lol. I have seen God move more miraculously on my behalf than ever before and its all because I have surrendered. I look at my accounts, my desires, my needs, and I have more than I have had in a very long time. God is too good.

In essence, don't stress. Don't worry. Don't be dismayed. He is working it out. Even as I type and as you read. Stand strong on the belief that if the birds are cool, so are you. Fly freely knowing that you can soar above anything that enemy may throw your way.

Flying above worries, pains, and disappointments,

~Mel

Giving your way to victory

2010-02-09T22:57:00.000-08:00

Well, many of you all that have been following me know about what I do with the grants and how I have pretty much been SOLELY walking by faith. Looks like I have some more praise reports to give. So, at the beginning of the year, I usually participate with the church and some of my closest friends in the Daniel's fast, where I give up meat, sweet drinks, junk food, etc. (look through older post for the full explanation). But in addition to that, I usually give my First Fruit offering.

This is where believers give an offering in addition to their tithes. For instance, if you make $1,000 in your first check of the year, you would give the whole thing or commit to doing so. You can break it up in installments or find a way to equal that amount, and pay your tithes of $100.

Here is a little background about it without giving you a FULL sermon.. lol. I got some notes from the lovely Pastor Paula White:

"Whatever you do with first fruit governs the rest and sets the pattern or
promise to come for the rest of whatever you establish. Whenever something is a
first, God lays claim to it because God sees the first thing as representing
what comes after . The principle is = God sees according to how the first things
are treated. When you honor God in obedience by presenting to Him all first
things, His presence covers and blesses the rest, sanctifies it… The law of
first things is the “giving over” (or devotion) as required, of first born,
first fruit… all things. They are an act of worship (or offering) in faith and
they prove the position in which the giver holds God and is held by God… All
privileges are released through receiving and believing His word. The law of
first things first has a fundamental impact on your life. First fruits is a
promise to come"

Following are all the scriptural references to "First Fruit".

That thou shalt take of the first of all the fruit of the earth, which thou shalt bring of thy land that the LORD thy God giveth thee, and shalt put [it] in a basket, and shalt go unto the place which the LORD thy God shall choose to place his name there. (Deuteronomy 26:2)

For the earth bringeth forth fruit of herself; first the blade, then the ear, after that the full corn in the ear. (Mark 4:28)

Thou shalt not delay [to offer] the first of thy ripe fruits, and of thy liquors: the firstborn of thy sons shalt thou give unto me. (Exodus 22:29)

For if the firstfruit be holy, the lump is also holy: and if the root be holy, so are the branches. (Romans 11:16)

So having knowledge of what "First Fruit" is and of what doors it may open, I knew that I had to give my way into the next dimension. My dream board and list of "wants" are so extensive, that I need God to move quickly on my behalf. With that being the case, I knew that I must sow a seed into the kingdom in order to be blessed. When I did, the floodgates of heaven's prosperity have truly opened.

Being that my father plays dual roles as my spiritual father and my biological father, I often have to make the distinction between the two. On this particular day, I heard it clear, "Sow unto the man of God". I'm like, "God, give the money to Dad?". He said, "No, give it to Apostle Mitchell". So I did. When I came to my father with my seed, he immediately began to praise God. He placed it in a bowl and said as the seed was placed into the earthly realm, God was going to recognize it as going in to the spiritual ground. He prayed a prayer of release, favor, and uncommon turn around . I literally felt a release in the atmosphere. He made me touch and agree with my mother that we would never live in lack again and that God was about to move in a mighty way on our behalf. Let me tell you, he did. Immediately.

As we were done praying, my mom was going through her monthly routine of paying bills and budgeting for the month. She went to pay the taxes for the house and they had already been paid and there was a zero balance. Come to find out, the taxes (that was well in the thousands) had been taken care of and she did not have to worry about them. Now, this was a DIRECT effect of the first fruit offering. My mom had been waiting to see if they had been paid and kept saying, "Lord I am going to trust you." Even when things got low and didn't look like they were going to come together, she held on to that belief.

For me, I saw God move in a mighty way. I had been trying to look for luggage for months because I kept hearing God saying I was going to be traveling soon. So one random day in a Target that I rarely go into, I found Swiss Gear luggage for 24.99 and 39.99. Marked done from 109.99 and 159.99. Did you hear me? Luggage that would have totaled almost $300 for under $100? It gets better. I went out with one of my guy friends to dinner and he was down most of the night about his finances, so God told me to treat him (which is CLEARLY a sacrifice because I too am on a budget). So I was obedient. The whole night, the restaurant service was super slow. So, I didn't act a fool and complain, I simply summoned the manager. Before I could complain, she said, you know what, I am going to take care of your bill, just pay for the fries and have a good evening. I almost fell out of my chair. My boy just began to shake his head in disbelief. God moved in even that small way. Then, this morning, I got a call from one of my cousins from church that I hadn't spoken to in a while. She said God told her to send me some money and she was calling for my address. I started not to even answer the phone. But honey, I did, and God moved.

I am just at a lost for words with God's favor. Not even because I gave money, but because He has entrusted me with such gifts and saw my true heart. Because my heart was pure in giving and never wavering, God blessed me accordingly. I am just so encouraged. As soon as I start to fret over something, I feel an immediate calm come over me, I cant do a thing but praise. He has been so, so good.

Today, I challenge you to sow your first fruits. Whether it be into a church and/or a man(or woman) of God. One thing I've learned is that you can't beat God in giving. At all. He makes it His priority to make sure we are taken care of. All our wants, needs, and desires are fulfilled in His will and way. We need only be obedient when we hear His voice and read His words.

I can't tell you enough how good God is. I only shared a few testimonies, but we would be here all day if I went down the entire list. I am still in awe. The luggage, the dinner, the phone call, I know it is just the beginning. I know many of you all are like me, constantly sowing, believing God, doing what you think/know is right, and feel like he has forgotten, He hasn't.

If you truly want to get His attention, do something to capture Him. Like me, my finances is an area where I can truly use some overflow, so to sow my first set of money from 2010, was heavy. But let me tell you, when I start doing God's math, my calculator went haywire. I can never be as good to Him as He is to me. Same with you. Sow your seed in your place of need today and watch God bless your roots, branches, and fruits.

Sowing today for my tomorrow,

~Mel

Moving Forward, No Matter What

2010-02-09T00:17:00.000-08:00

No matter what you have faced today, declare that you will move forward. This is not saying that you will not face adversity, pain, an argument, or a disagreement. This is merely saying that no matter what comes your way, you are going to make a commitment to yourself to not dwell in those moments. It is in the moment of adversity that God can rise you up stronger than before. There is nothing that you cannot face with God on your side.

Know that life will not be perfect, but God has a perfect will for our lives. In saying that, I am merely stressing the importance of relying on God. We must seek Him daily to be renewed in strength and in understanding. The same God that delivered you before, will do it again.

We should practice moving forward in even the smallest things so it will become habit, a way of life, then our character. You will truly feel triumphant when you look at the journey God has brought you along. It is awesome to see God's hand over our lives.

Don't ever think that a situation you are facing is bigger than the God in you. He has placed all the abilities you will need to overcome the mountains that you must climb. Keep moving swiftly towards the promises that He has laid before you.

Pressing ahead, moving forward, not looking back,

~Mel

Moving Forward Quotes:

If we are to go forward, we must go back and rediscover those precious values - that all reality hinges on moral foundations and that all reality has spiritual control. Martin Luther King, Jr.

I hope to stand firm enough to not go backward, and yet not go forward fast enough to wreck the country's cause. Abraham Lincoln

It is for us to pray not for tasks equal to our powers, but for powers equal to our tasks, to go forward with a great desire forever beating at the door of our hearts as we travel toward our distant goal. Helen Keller

If everyone is moving forward together, then success takes care of itself. Henry Ford

Song of the Day: Moving Forward by Israel Houghton

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